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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

not to answer the door or phone if I dont feel like it

156 replies

thefruitwhisperer · 17/02/2011 12:18

Sometimes I cant be fucked. I do however always call the person back when I can be bothered to talk, normally within an hour or so.

DP thinks Im an abomination.

OP posts:
crazypanda · 17/02/2011 13:14

good for you moomoo,well at least you are being sociable now.

fruitshootsandheaves · 17/02/2011 13:15

I don't answer the phone if it is a withheld or international number as I know it will be someone trying to sell me something.

My large kitchen window looks out at the front door so people can see I am in when they walk up to it before i see them! I had some Jehovah's call this morning, I had a guilty mouthful of biscuits but I did answer the door spat some biscuit crumbs at them when I said good morning, politely took their leaflet, nodded a lot, then ran away!

Mammie81 · 17/02/2011 13:18

People tend to regret knocking on our door. The labour candidate woman turned up to canvas and my Mum told her to get the fuck off our drive.

MooMooFarm · 17/02/2011 13:19

fruitshoots you know, you have summed up what used to annoy me in our old house - which is that people assume if they can see you are at home, you have a duty to answer the door to them. Well you bloody well don't.

Just cos your car's in the drive, doesn't mean you're not in the bath/on the phone/ having a bonk/ sitting on your arse and don't want to get up! And just because you were 'spotted' at your kitchen window, doesn't mean you are in any position to answer the door! I mean, for all they knew, you could have had anything going on below waist-level couldn't you? Assuming your windows stop at waist level, that is!

Why am I getting so wound up about this?

bootilicious · 17/02/2011 13:20

Another one who doesn't answer the phone or door.

I reckon I have a choice, a knock on the door (or ringing phone) is a request, not a demand, I can choose whether I want to answer, and take the consequences (unwelcome intrusion) if I do.

And yes I am anti-social :)

crazypanda · 17/02/2011 13:20

that was nice of you,it maybe that you were the first person that had answered the door to them today,your good deed for the day!.

hmmSleep · 17/02/2011 13:21

I never answer the phone, dh doesn't either, we both just sit there staring at it like it's a bomb about to go off and wait for the answer machine to kick in. We are very antisocial busy.

littlewish · 17/02/2011 13:22

I've not answered the door 2 mins ago as it was the window cleaner and I gave all my money to Dh, DS1 and DS2 this morning! Blush I'm not going to go upstairs and tip out the money boxes and "borrow" any either, he'll be back later and I'll have been to get cashback at Asda! Grin £2.50 per fortnight, is that reasonable btw?

KenDoddsDadsDog · 17/02/2011 13:22

YANBU I do the same. Can't be arsed.

TrillianAstra · 17/02/2011 13:24

YANBU.

I am not at your beck and call. (whrre "you" is whoever is outside my house or ringing my phone)

littlewish · 17/02/2011 13:24

I don't answer the phone if I don't have too either! It's always MIL telling me stuff like shes changed the bed or pegged the washing out Confused. I let the kids answer and deal with her. Blush

Lucy85 · 17/02/2011 13:24

Stephen Fry says a ringing telephone is like someone jumping up and down on your desk shouting 'talk to me NOW talk to me NOW!' I prefer texting.

crazypanda · 17/02/2011 13:25

hmmsleep,i like your style!Smile

lololizzy · 17/02/2011 13:27

yanbu. I didn't even have a mobile phone for about a year (or a landline) a few yrs back, and didn't miss it at all. Liked the peace, in fact. If there really was an emergency, people knew they could reach me at work. Or email.
I still don't answer it much..but it's not ideal not having a phone if you drive..in case of breakdown, obviously.

Lucifera · 17/02/2011 13:30

Ah, I always answer door and phone. If it's the door I think it just might be a friend or nice neighbour (of course it's usually a charity fundraiser or worse), and if phone I can't not answer in case it's some emergency. Also I'd much rather answer it than pick up an answerphone message.

fruitshootsandheaves · 17/02/2011 13:31

Sometimes it's easier to just say "hello, not interested, goodbye" than it is to try to ignore people at the door.
My windows do stop at waist height but maybe I should answer the door with nothing on my lower half next time, I'm sure that would get rid of most people a lot quicker! Grin

messylittlemonkey · 17/02/2011 13:31

YANBU. Especially with the phone.

My mum always leaps on her phone as soon as it rings, owuld never occur to her that you don't HAVE to answer it. She thinks I'm strange if I don't answer the phone.

crazypanda · 17/02/2011 13:32

to think years ago before we had phones,people managed without,they had no choice,sometimes they are obviously a blessing,but sometimes they can also be a curse.

FindingStuffToChuckOut · 17/02/2011 13:32

YANBU

Sinkingfeeling · 17/02/2011 13:34

YANBU - my Mum regards it as a crime against humanity if I don't answer the phone (she's in another country so can't get worried about the door!). I simply see it as exercising my right not to speak to or see anyone if I don't want to.

ShatnersBassoon · 17/02/2011 13:34

YANBU. I think most people ignore the phone sometimes. I often turn the ringer off when I want an undisturbed evening.

BendyBob · 17/02/2011 13:35

I don't either. It's usually someone flogging something or one of dc's trillions of annoying friends banging on the door.

boyscomingoutofmyears · 17/02/2011 13:38

I never answer the phone in the evenings, with the exception of Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays at 8 pm as this is when my mother calls. I have spent years ingnoring the phone at these times but have found that the following happens.

Step 1- she calls the landline, if no answer
Step 2- she calls my mobile, if no answer
Step 3- she calls DH's mobile, if no answer
Step 4- she repeats the cycle, if still no answer
Step 5- she comes over Angry

This happened when I was in labour so I eventually had to answer my phone and have a 45 minute conversation about her new wardrobes and the weather while contracting. I couldn't actually tell her I was in labour as she would have then called every hour for an update...or worse she would have come over!

Sorry, rant over.....and breathe!

crazypanda · 17/02/2011 13:39

double glazing,don't want to upset anyone who is a salesperson or related etc...,but a lot of the time spent answering the door is to said parties.

TrillianAstra · 17/02/2011 13:41

I like my mobile phone. It tells me who is calling, offers me a 'be quiet now' button, and notes down who called and when so I can call them back if and when I desire.

My parents are well trained to call once, send a text if they have something to say, and leave it.

DP's family ring, leave a voicemail, ring some more, wait a bit and ring again. We get it. You want to talk to DP. Well guess what, he doesn't want to (or can't). So just wait.