Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

To feel sad for these kids?

140 replies

EvilTwins · 13/02/2011 17:50

I'm a drama teacher, and am about to put on this year's school play. We've got 35 kids involved, and they have been working their socks off - we've even been in school today. Without exception, they are having a great time, and are putting an incredible effort in. However, over the last week or so, I have had to realise how many of them get absolutely no support from home with stuff like this - parents not willing to drop their kids at school for the evening performances because they "don't want to have to hang around and wait for them", parents who aren't going to come and watch their children perform, and aren't giving them any praise or encouragement at home. It upsets them, and I think it's really sad. I went to pick up 4 girls from home this morning - one mother doesn't drive (no problem with that), but the others had to "go out" so it was a case of me picking them up, or them not being able to come. I don't mind doing the lifts - I just think it's a shame that their parents are so disinterested in something their DCs are a) enthusiastic about, b) really good at, and c) working really hard on.

OP posts:

lospolloshermanos · 14/02/2011 14:45

it is very sad some parents are just lazt and uninterested and their kids will pick up the tab, I want to shake them sometimes

namechange100 · 14/02/2011 15:01

I think there are some parents who may be genuinely too busy to fit this temporary series of activities in with other regular activities.

There are two mums in my DS reception class who don't appear to support extra activites or events that aren't part of the normal school week. Their DC's don't ever come to parties when invited or have costumes on for mufti days etc, the DH of one stopped and asked me advice about some forthcomming events once - So yes i think there are lazy parents out there.

Shallishanti · 14/02/2011 17:53

why this assumption that teenagers lie?
ime, they can be very uncommunicative (at home) but if you conduct operations on the basis of assuming they lie all the time, you will not have good relationships....OK they may exaggerate, but that's easily spotted

and just because some yp have histories that are far worse than the ones OP describes, does not mean it's not sad and demoralising for these particular kids.

Drama can be so valuable, develops so many skills, it's not just about performing...so sad if people think 'they did all that at primary' as one poster suggested

jonicomelately · 14/02/2011 18:00

DP's parents were like this. They preferred to watch TV.

OP you are lovely. These parents are useless twats.

princessparty · 14/02/2011 18:08

I think it's funny so many of assume that kids should be on public transport on Sundays.I assume you all live in towns and cities where there actually is some?

activate · 14/02/2011 19:04

yes (smug)

Annpan88 · 14/02/2011 19:08

I think OP was concerned about the affect she had seen this to have on some on her students, not just assuming that every parent who doesn't bend over backwards doesn't care but showing a concern from what has been expressed to her by the kids and maybe just needed to express this and why not on mumsnet? People talk about all sorts of randomness and just want to get things of their chest sometimes

specialsmasher · 14/02/2011 19:13

What a depressingly tetchy thread!

Glad the disinterested / uninterested thing got sorted out satisfactorily though!

I think AIBU is my least favourite part of Mumsnet. Seems like a prerequisite is to be rude if you disagree. I think the OP was remarkably cool & level-headed not to be very defensive very quickly.

Probably a mistake to venture into AIBU with any comment on parents from a teacher...

diabolo · 14/02/2011 19:17

princessparty - you're so right. Where I live there is one bus on a Sunday morning and one pm, and that's about to get cut.

Some people on here seem to have VERY different views about this subject, but I'm with the OP. I see it every day at the "deprived" school I work in. But it's not just limited to inner-city / poor / chav etc etc whatever other stereotypes people want to label these parents with.

They'd be uninterested whatever their social status - they're just knobs and imagine what these kids could achieve if they had more interest / support.

jenga079 · 14/02/2011 19:24

Wow OP, I can't believe the stick you got. How dare you give up your own time, unpaid, to support people's teenage children in doing something they feel passionately about?

Good luck with the show. It sounds like it will be brilliant.

smugmumofboys · 14/02/2011 19:40

yanbu. I'm also a teacher and have seen this attitude before.

And am rather at all those claiming that the students should be able to make it in under their own steam. We are in a semi-rural area and the vast majority of our students get a school bus. Public transport is almost non-existent at the weekend.

altinkum · 14/02/2011 19:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

EvilTwins · 14/02/2011 19:52

Thanks for the supportive posts. I guess it only goes to show that sometimes, teachers can't do anything right.

We had a great dress rehearsal today, and the kids are buzzing about opening night tomorrow.

I'll be letting them know how proud I am of them.

OP posts:

deste · 14/02/2011 20:22

Good luck for tomorrow, my own DD is about to train as a drama teacher and I'm sure she will be as dedicated as you are.

GrimmaTheNome · 14/02/2011 20:40

Good luck with the show, Evil!

YANBU to feel sad that these kids have parents who aren't interested ... I'm a bit stunned really, by that itself and some of the negative comments this thread garnered.

But I don't feel too sad for this particular bunch as they seem to have a drama teacher who goes the extra mile for them - an inspirational teacher can make a huge difference in any childs life.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6