Poll: Prefer to be called Christian name or Mrs by children

[Mrsredoneslast]

By request.
Do you prefer to be called by your christian name or by your "title"..Mrs, Ms etc...by children (acquiantances's children/ dc's school friends etc)

So which

A)christian name

or

B) "title"
?

A, although I usually get x's mum

Depends on the child - children of close friends can and do call me Auntie French but I will expect DS's friends (and those of any future potential siblings of his) to address me as Mrs LimeBlossom, until I decide otherwise and invite them to call me French.

I would happily say "I'd prefer you call me Mrs LimeBlossom" to any friend's child or child's friend if I felt it was more appropriate. And I will be teaching DS and siblings to address grown ups as Mr and Mrs until they are told otherwise, for me it is important to make the distinction between peers and elders. Btw I am 'only' 34 and was brought up that way myself.

If my friends want to do differently that's their business!

A

very definitely - that is my name
(although will answer to little-acorns-Mum)

At my DCs school I call the all of the teachers by their frist names too. They do the same to me. Except in front of the children.

I don't understand why calling someone "Mrs whatever" implies respect. I think it is more respectful to call someone what they personally want to be called, whether that is "Mrs.XXX", "Auntie Whatever" or just plain "Whatever"

"I don't understand why calling someone "Mrs whatever" implies respect."

Because it used to and it still does to a great many people. DD's teacher used to call me Mrs Bunbaker, but as we are both on the PTA committee and I asked him to call me by my first name he is quite happy to do so.

B, by young children, unless I have said otherwise. Normally I would say 'Call me Shodan' quite early on though since it saves being called 'err'. Teenagers I say it straightaway.

My children are told to address adults as Mr or Mrs Whatever until told otherwise too.

My mother, otoh, tried to make DH call her Mrs Shodan'sMother until we got married, whereupon she changed it to Mother-in-law. He got round it by avoiding situations where he had to address her at all, then I told her not to be silly and that he would call her by her forename.

I agree that it is showing respect to call a person what they wish to be called.

An absolute pet hate of mine

HATE children calling me my first name.

That is fine breathing, as long as you take note that some people (e.g. me) HATE children calling me Mrs, Ms or Auntie. You can control what they call you, but not what they are asked to call other people.

I cant control it. People should have the courtesy to tell their children to use Mrs unless instructed otherwise rather than jumping in and telling them to call me by my first name.

I think that you misunderstood, you can control what they call you, insist on Mrs Breathing. What you can't control is expecting other people to let your DCs call them Mrs when they want a first name.

I think in formal situations like doctors / school / professional settings B) would be appropriate to use in front of and by children but I think it would be naffing ridonkulous for my BFF's kids to call me Ms. Schwarzkopf.

Then again I have a stooopid surname which is more inclined to make the kids laugh (2 syllables, first is a rustic noun, second is a synomym for penis) and I prefer my first name. Who wouldn't? Tondelayo is a FAB name.

Rather than children, I would prefer B) to be used by colleagues and professional associates. I think it's the workplace that is a little too informal these days rather than children's relationships with adults.

Its nice to have been given the option. Particularly with children of acquaintances rather than friends. Its awful when some random parent of a child from ds' class tells her child to call me my name. I always ask my children to say "mrs...." but if they then insist on their first name, its fine.
They have been given the option.

A - anything other than DS's Mum though is great.

There are some acquaintances from school particularly who I don't their surnames.

B.

Because of what Hecate said.

A.

Until I read this thread it had genuinely never occurred to me that a child would/should ever call me Ms. Rosa.

I'm trying to picture any of DD's friends saying it and it's just not computing.

Kids who know me call me by my forename. DD's nursery friend's who don't know me just call me LittleRosa's Mum. Suits me fine.

I prefer to be called by my first name but am secretly impressed by children who call me Ms X or at least ask my DDs what they should call me.

I insist that my own children call adults Mrs/Mr X until they're invited to do otherwise though. I have a couple of close friends who are "Aunty X and Uncle Y" to my daughters. These are people I have known since before the children were born and to whom I'm particularly close and is a mark of affectionate respect. I don't care if I'm considered old fashioned or old. I am old!

The one thing I can't abide being called is "DDsname's mum". I'd rather be defined by what I do or "the woman from number 999" or even "DarlingDogs owner" than "so-and-so's mum".

B

Auntie Sulky to wee ones who I am close to and Sulky to others.

agree with not using the Mrs, but where do folks stand on using 'aunty' when addressing friends who aren't actual relatives?

I don't know! my DC are only 6 and 2...so it's not really come up! i tend to be "Little Wimple's Mummy" when they want me!

I suppose I would be A.

A - Freetime. Normally by preference, in reality its usually DSmum.
B - Work. Its a requirement, as in a school.

Absolutely hate to be addressed as "Aunty" cause I'm no-ones aunt. Also can't stand anyone being introduced to DS as "Aunty" cause they are not apart from his real one of course - are you listening MIL!!!

I hate being called Auntie and ironically enough my nephews do not call me that but plain Tondelayo. OTOH a surprising number of my otherwise well educated and immaculately mannered friends insist on the Auntie thing.

I prefer (c) '[DD's] Mummy' tbh!

And I am torn between finding being called by my first name by a reception age child cute or precocious!

But I certainly don't want to be called Mrs UCM.