or is the nursery?

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Got a call today from my DD's nursery to say she had fallen asleep and could I come and get her as they hoped to take the other children out for a walk - whilst I didn't want to inconvenience the other children it was also quite inconvenient for me to cut short my plans to dash there.

It's a small and usually sweet nursery and not one that usually facilitates naps, but when I had asked before what would happen in this situation and if for example, she was tired and looking at a book in the reading corner and fell asleep would it be ok? I had been given the impression that yes, that would be ok.

She's not quite two, so still quite little, and had had a bad night's sleep, hence she fell asleep whilst reading a book with one of the nursery workers.

I asked them to try and wake her after ten minutes and then I would come if she wouldn't, and rang back 10 minutes later. They weren't keen on trying because she was "snoring and really asleep."

I got there ten minutes later to see her being woken by another child who simply stroked her cheek a couple of times, so felt a bit annoyed that this was all it took and that they still seemed keen for her to go home, despite me having to pay for the session.

Anyway (I'm getting there!) what really upset me is that she had been left lying face down on hard, and fairly cold floor.
I feel that it's uncomfortable, unhygienic (she only recently recovered from croup too) and that she was vulnerable to being trodden on. If any child in my care fell asleep on the floor I would move them to a comfortable spot (she had a picket fence-enclosed beanbag area that was two feet behind her), or at the very least slipped a cushion under their face??

When I calmly asked this, I was shrugged off and told that they don't facilitate naps and that they "didn't know how long she would be there for". I asked how long it had been and the lady said half an hour!

I rang the manager (who was there at the time) this afternoon after checking with my DH that I wasn't being precious, he for once (!) said no and that I should clear it up). I asked her several times that if this situation ever arose again, would they put her somewhere safe and comfortable until I got there? She gave me a variety of evasive non-answers like "we don't facilitate naps", when children fall asleep during a session they need their mum" , "the other children tried to wake her for ages and in the end we called them away", until the fourth time I asked and she just said "hmmm, yess, yess, anyway". I just felt flabbergasted and said see you next time.

I'm not sure if they're being wishy-washy or taking the piss!

I feel I've been uber-polite about it so far, even though I feel like flouncing but it's a small world round here,and I've been really trying to fit in to this new area and feel unsure of my next move. I like her carers but can't compute that they also think this is acceptable...

WWYD? I have to go out but will gratefully read your replies when I can throughout the evening.

WHAAAAT?!? Is this for real? A nursery taking 2yo who can't cope with naps?! Surely this is a wind-up thread.

If it's not then it is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard about a nursery and I would suggest that unless you want lots of phone calls to collect, you find a different nursery or childminder, one that can cope with normal day to day events such as naps

Whatever next "my nursery rang and asked if I could come and change my child's nappy as they had done a poo and they don't facilitate the removal of nappies?"

I used to work in Ofsted's Early Years Compliance and Investigation section - the bit that dealt with complaints and concerns about childminders and nurseries. I echo the many calls to contact Ofsted about this; 0300 1231231, or enquiries - at -ofsted.gov.uk. On the face of it they seem to be breaching the EYFS requirements, and at the very least Ofsted would want to write to them and get their side of the story!

As others have said, there are requirements for childcare providers to have somewhere for children to sleep. I also can't imagine why a childcare professional would feel it necessary to call a parent in because their child was having a nap?! It's very bizarre. EYFS is "child-led", and there is sometimes confusion because this means that generally speaking nursery workers and childminders shouldn't be waking children up from naps or preventing them from sleeping - i.e. if a parent asks them not to let a child sleep and the child is exhausted and keeps nodding off, they shouldn't force the child to stay awake or only let them doze for ten minutes if they really need a longer sleep. Clutching at straws they might have then not wanted to wake her up themselves, but they should adapt to her need to sleep, not just call you in.

I find it very bizarre that somewhere that takes under twos wouldn't have space to nap and let all the children have quiet time or sleep if needs be - little ones of that age can't always be expected to go all day. They sound quite bonkers!

Sorry but the UTTER bastards! I would have wanted to freak out if I had seen my DD asleep like that!

It's how you found her that disturbs me most..though the calling you in is bad enough!

Kids of 5 fall asleep in schoolffs and their techers can deal with them!

Report them to Ofsted and get her out of there. Dont warn them either...nor pay them anything.

Poor DD.

YANBU

It sounds like they are set-up for the 3+ age group but are taking children much younger than that for some reason. You would think they would at least have a pushchair they could put her in.

I would change nurseries tbh.

Ps. DON'T go feeling bad...from the reactions on here you can be assured this is bad ...not what paents expect or usually get.

This sounds totally crazy to me - YADNBU!! My 18 mo old is at nursery once a week whilst I go to work - it would be absolutely unthinkable for them to call me to pick him up just 'cos he'd gone to sleep, and I think it's unthinkable to look after toddlers without "facilitating naps"

Look for another nursery immediately, and make it absolutely clear to your present nursery why you're doing so!

Get a new nursery

report this one to ofsted

So do the children attend this nursery for an entire day? (or just morning or afternoon sessions) I can't get my head around not allowing naps, for under-2s. And they really mean it when they say they 'don't facilitate' naps, if they can't even move a sleeping toddler to somewhere safer and more comfortable!

Could they not have popped her in a buggy if the entire staff were going to be out on this walk?

Ofsted, definitely.

UN. BE. LIEVABLE.

OP YADefNBU.

My DSs nursery has a standard nap time for over 12mo's - straight after lunch in a quiet room with small mattresses and blankets. HOWEVER, if a child looks tired at ANY time of the day, they either take them to the baby room cots (for the smaller toddlers) or let them have a rest in a quiet corner, on a bean bag or in a pushchair.

Also, whether they are going for a walk or not is not your problem. You pay them to look after your child, asleep or not. I would be FURIOUS if I was asked to pick my child up because he went to sleep. It really just beggars belief.

Phone ofsted, find a new nursery.

Jeez, our school will 'facilitate naps' if a school age child falls asleep, never mind a two year old! I don't like the sound of them at all. Not really Every Child Matters, is it? Grr. :(

Utterly ridiculous and unacceptable. Find a new nursery.

DS is 2 years 3 months and naps every single day. He'll nap up to 3.5 hours if we let him (usually keep it to 1.5-2 hours in order to keep a good nighttime sleep routine, too). How can a nursery with kids near 2 not facilitate naps?!

I would find a new nursery or a cm.

YADNBU I am stunned that any nursery wouldn't facilitate naps for under 2's!! My DS is 3.3 and is in the preschool room at nursery and they still facilitate naps for those who want to. Needless to say DS doesn't and is always shattered by the end of the day

I would definitely talk to OFSTED and look for an alternative nursery for your DD. Leaving her face down on a cold, hard floor is terrible poor mite.

YANBU!!!!

what kind of nursery would call a parent home from work or from whatever they were doing because their child had fallen asleep and was messing up the rest of the plans for the day?!??!

it is outrageous and an absolute imposition on you .

i would be looking for another childcare setting and reporting to OFSTED

I'm How bloody dare they treat your DC with such little care!
And the 'children need their mothers comment' very odd sounds almost like a 'hobby' business than an actual business.

OP I hope you're not too upset. It must be hard hearing the anger on your DDs behalf.

I think it was the description of how you found her that got people so mad...I am sure DD has no idea that she was neglected like that...my brother once fell asleep in a plate of susages and mash and was left there by my sister (then 13) for half an hour! he woke up cheerful as ever...I know it's not the pint that DD hopefully wasn't upset by it...but just so you don't feel bad about it all.

YANBU that is so sad that they left her like that.
DS1 is nearly 5 and just totally dropping naps now, he is at a pre-school nursery attatched to a primary and it only there for just over 2 hours a day and the teachers have mentioned kids crashing out on the cushions in the story corner so even they can facilitate naps if need be.

DS2's nursery isn't that big and there's nowhere a child could really nap so they keep 2 spare small buggies folded up - then if a child falls asleep and their own buggy's not there they can just curl up with a blanket in a buggy in a quiet corner. Then if they're asleep and need to move as the kids are changing places in the space it's OK.

They're being wishy washy and lazy and YANBU.

Bless you, Wimple :) very thoughtful post. x

OMG thats awful, when my children went to nursery they ensured all the kids had naps after lunch. They catered for babies from three months to four years.

That is terrible, to entrust your child in to someone else's care is actually a big deal and you expect them to look after your child. Making sure a child is warm and comfortable is surly a basic requirement?

This is unsatisfactory child care in my opinion and the manager would not instill any confidence in me. Sadly, I agree with everyone else and would remove my child from this facility (or offer to help out for a session or 2 to get an inside look!) and I would certainly contact OFSTED - that's what they are there for.

Craziness - there is no way my two year old could get through a day without falling asleep. Even my 4yo's preschool insists that the children lie down for a rest after lunch.

Hi everyone, am back from my evening class and have read all your comments. Thanks for posting, really appreciate each and every one although might not get round to replying to them all!

Wimple I must say I was feeling very sad again going through all the comments, but your sausages and mash made me smile!

The nursery is very small (one room with two parts - activity table where they also eat lunch, and a quieter reading section in the back) and the kids are usually older 2.5-4 in the main, but it's a small village nursery and also montessori (so it's supposed to be a big family apparently). She's the youngest by a few months but copes very well with it.
There is a morning session (she normally does this twice a week), an afternoon session and the all day option which we are just trying.
Although the manager seems quite passive-aggressive as a lot of you say, she is not usually there (was today, filling in) and the carers themselves are very nice to DD, although I have noticed they don't take the initiative in situations a lot.

Because they are nice to her and because she enjoys it, I suppose this is why this has shocked me so much. How can such seemingly nice people believe this is acceptable??
The other children were at the tables-end of the room when I got there, and DD was on the floor by the reading area, so it's not as though she'd have prevented anyone sitting down with a book as they weren't using the area.

She is registered with another nursery, a pre-school I was going to use nearer to her school age time, but she can't attend until she's 2 which is a month away. Sadly I can't find a daycare type nursery that has a nap time built in. When I was in a city they were commonplace, yet in the countryside it feels like you're expected to be sat at home waiting for the call?!

A lot of your comments struck a chord with me and I will be using them in my next talk with the manager. I feel no matter whether my LO stays or not, I need to make a difference to how they treats others.