Bit of an old thread but I'm gonna jump in here anyway.
I cannot believe some of yours attitudes and comments to the OP. She didn't say she was never going to talk to her kids just that she wasn't happy with it being taught in schools - everytime someone brings this up on mumsnet everyone assumes that if you don't include your kids in sex ed you are not going to tell them anything or are a religous nutjob as someone put.
Another comment that comes up a lot is "it will be age appropriate" - by whose definition? who knows better than a parent what is age appropriate for their child, the government, a teacher, I don't think so. In the UK it seems to be that Channel 4 have decided what is appropriate and that includes telling 5 yr olds it's nice to rub your clitoris & 7 year olds how to have sex in several positions and telling them how exciting and fun it is.
Someone quoted early sex ed reduces sexual activity, where are you getting this from? - there have been no studies yet in the UK into the effects of early sex education - lots of studies of effects of sex education on teens and guess what - it doesn't work and in some areas increased pregnancies. The Teenage Pregnancy Strategy cost £300 million lasted 10 years,achieved nothing and has now been disbanded.
As to The Netherlands - yes they teach sex ed but it differs from school to school and again there is no evidence that it has a bearing on their low rates. They have a strong family culture, sexual activity is seen to be shameful oh and don't forget they don't hand out flats and benefits to teenage mums.
It's the attitudes in this country are wrong not lack of education and it's parents that influence attitude more than anything.
You all seem to want your kids to be well informed yet are ill informed yourself about the materials being used in schools, how unsuccessfull the pregnancy strategy has been, or how attitudes in the Netherlands differ from here.
As for kids needing to know everything - when are we gonna take a step back and remember they are KIDS and we are the adults, they fight with you over homework, don't understand discipline and generally behave with the maturity they have - just cos you give them knowledge it does not mean they use that knowledge wisely. Would you give your 10 yr old a million pounds and expect them to spend it wisely?
There are loads of kids having sex and getting pregnant - True, there are also equally a lot of kids not having sex, aware of it via playground talk yes but really interested in it at 9, 10 , 11 . No - Normalising and encouraging young kids to think about, talk about, and watch explicit videos about sex will only lower their inhibitions eventually.
When the time comes I'll teach my kids about puberty & allow my kids to learn about puberty at school (if it's done in an appropriate way)cos that is growing up and will happen to them, anything above and beyond that I won't because ultimately I am responsible for my childs welfare, not the school, and I will be the one to pick up the pieces if he gets it into is head that having sex at 13 is perfectly acceptable as long as you use a condom. Until such time there is strong conclusive evidence that we are not sexualising our children and the conception and std rates are going down I'm afraid the gov, schools and C4 can take their explicit videos and stick them where the sun doesnt shine.