To think swinging is URRGH!?

[TurkeyBurgerThing]

There is are two couples on This Morning just now talking about their love for swinging. They're just your normal looking every day couples. One couple own a swinging hotel and they do to clubs.

I find this really sleazy and just plain weird. She's saying that it's really common amongst primary school teachers too!!

Eeeew I bet they'll be swapping after the show.

AIBU to think this is a very strange thing to do and be so open about?

led.. I also get offended when because I am married and share body fluids only with my DH, I am somehow repressed and "vanilla"

"vanilla" is an insulting term

just because you are in a monogamous relationship, doesn't mean you can't be adventurous

I just don't feel the need to flaunt it

exhibitionists do my tree in

attention-seeking...much ?

drunkendaisy-"what happens when you are like 55 and your dh finds a young swinger who loves it up the wrong-un?" I actually snorted coffee out of my nose lmao at this. Please mn make it quote of the week!!.

fair enough, fb

these threads often go the same way though, I think that is why some of us are going for the irreverent angle

you should do what makes you happy, as long as you are not coerced or emotionally-blackmailed into fulfilling some cock's wet dream

if you are 110% sure you are not, good luck to you

as far as I know, there is no legislation to protect swingers against discrimination

whereas there is for same-sex couples

perhaps there should be ?

a Swinger's Charter, perchance ?

fb...you should petiion The Coalition

petition

and I believe you

And of course swingers think they are attractive.....as Anyfucker says, they are exhibitionists so they think the whole world wants to gape up their slashed hamster or get their hands on their spaniels ears.

They are deluded into thinking the whole world wants to fuck them because they are so delicious. Funny how these places are always dimly lit....sorry seductively lit they aren't tub thumping under a set of strip lights are they?

Exhibitionists all have imagined beauty disorder...Just as Hugh Heffner is deluded into thinking those bunnies want to fuck him for his horny body.

Ledk .I wonder if doggers are morte asthetically pleasing

I perused the dogging site that was linked to the other wek on MN with B/F and we did comment that all the women were (un)dressed in typical long boots fishnet/suspender combos and the men ..... welll lets just say they all looked like refugees that you see trying to sneak onto lorries at Calais

Hmmm as I said fb you seem to be vetting your potential shag buddies, but Anyfucker, correct me if I'm wrong there have been a few peeps on here who have contracted something unexpected and nasty from a swingers club?

Plus the more peole writhing around, the more chance of someone misinterpreting and slipping you one up the wrong un? That's heat happened to a buddy of mine - remember Ifancykevinelevin?

fbwife to be fair your points have been very respectfull and as i said i dont really have a prob with it all as doesnt affect me It was another poster who declared we were vanilla which didnt help your cause.

old raver i thought as much.Dont you just love it when saggy old birds put on some primark underwear and some shiney knee high boots,draw on some eyebrows and bobs your uncle; a stunner!

fbwife, I think you have been a very good sport answering questions etc. BTW, have you ever been to any clubs like the ones linked to? Do they get busy?

"Peering - we did but he scarpered. I thought he was just adjusting his trousers but alas no, he was having a sly shufty shock

Went in my friend's hair gross.

I almost made my own faux pas by trying to help the poor unfortunate lady who was hogtied in the women's bathroom. It was not a woman and she didn't want to be untied, oops... "

at Brian

I am and so very that my eyebrow has disappeared into my hairline at some of these comments - really so rude and judgy. I don't swing, have never swung and have never been even remotely tempted to do so - although I did like a good fetish club, in years gone by. But I don't presume to judge others about what turns them on, and why. Why would you, unless it affects you directly? God forbid anyone judge any of your parenting skills, yet it's fine to dictate what others should do in bed??

Sheesh!

oh, I like fb too

but I don't fancy her

just making that clear

well, I dunno, 'cos I never met her

I might do

but anyhoo, there is no way my DH is giving her one, so that's it really

and her DH wears white socks and grey shoes so that's it for me

led, I think you mean stunna not stunner

Erm cough cough. As much as I hate bringing this up again dh and I tried swinging 2 years ago and caught gonorrhoea . It was just one time and we were both fully protected. Turns out it is easier to catch than you would think. Anyway we tried it but decided not to bother again then we started getting symptoms but didn't think anything of it as they were minimal. I ended up with an infection in my womb which was horrendously painful and made me very ill. We had to be treated twice each as we had caught a resistant strain. My tubes may have been badly damaged by the infection - will never know as our family is complete. Either way it was horrible and humiliating. I would never judge other people on how they want to conduct their sex lives but whenever this topic comes up I share my story - as much as I hate to - as a warning. Be bloody careful!

As for the emotional stuff that did not affect us but I can see how it could cause problems in a relationship. Maybe some things should stay as a fantasy...... Depends what you can handle really. You might be surprised how upsetting you might find the whole thing.

nikki, I remember you

but thought it would be very bad form to name you

nikki shit luck there,dont think of getting that when protected do you?

if I remember correctly nikki, wasn't the female in this equation very rough with you, to the point of hurting you and making you cry ?

doesn't sound like much fun to me

Hi nikki I remember you too from another thread, and I do think it is important to highlight the risks so it is great that you do come on in all honesty. And your story was a strange one if I remember didn't it get a bit nasty? Or was that someone else?

If we were explaining the risks of sky diving or bungee jumping no one would be miffed, but because this is about some one's sex life it seems to raise the hackles.

But if you put your sex life in the personal domain and in great detail then folks will comment and be critical.

And actually no one is criticizing the choice of sex life, more the way these clubs look and feel and smell. To the majority it is a massive turn off, having sexy dancing and "pleatherette" oh how I chortled at that one! Sateen red shiny knickers and peephole bras.

It is like enforced romance on valentines day is to me. I think it is the most unromantic night ever, couples forced into italian bistros with wicker chianti bottles hanging everywhere pretending it is romance whilst bickering through gritted teeth.

Gosh, how very predictable. I have always found one of the key identifiers of a mundane is how obsessed they are with the superiority of their own unimaginative sex lives over everyone else's. Generally, you know, people who are secure and content with the sort of sex they have, are not bothered about what other people like to do - there's a difference between knowing what you like and sticking to it and being forever on the sniff for people who are different so you can rant on about how wrong and wierd and unattractive they are.

Two points no one else has addressed much yet:
WHy get or stay married if you are going to swing? Well, as is sometimes discussed on here, marriage is a good way to protect your own and each other's rights WRT property, children, being each other's next of kin etc. And there is actually no legal requirement for married people to be sexually exclusive (the superstitious requirements are another matter but those are not compulsory).

And the decor in clubs: I suppose some of you have always conducted your social lives in the Ritz or the Hilton or the naice waine bar that used to be a bank, but most music-orientated nightclubs tend to be a bit grubby and have unaesthetic decor. I have been to a few swingers clubs that were actually very nice indeed in terms of fixtures and fittings - and some which were less so but still gave me a good night out.

yes, sgb, how very predictable

here you are, yapping about "mundanes"

you are completely oblivious to the fact that the judgement goes both ways, aren't you ?

binfull i always think that on valentines day,all a bit forced and obligatory.

Oh god. This is what I will be forever known for on mn isn't it? . I can't ever attend a meet up just in case I know one of you in rl! Anyway yes someone did get a bit rough with me. She was just like that and she was very apologetic but it was enough to put me right off as she made me bleed internally and I suddenly realised what a risk I was taking with my health.

Anyway as I said I refuse to judge others for doing this and think it is fine to experiment sexually with your partner. I got unlucky maybe but it happens every now and then.

I am normal by the way. Not some mad sex crazed freak