To be terrified of registering with GP

[theratpack]

Sorry this is REALLY long:
during booking visit i ticked the box history of mental health problems ( as do 1 in 4 of us at some point in our lives). I naively believed it wouldn't be a problem, and if i needed support i would get kind, compassionate support.

Later i find out that after spending 10 mins with useless midwife at booking visit, she has activated a child protection alert. Suffered LOTS of horrible experiences due to alert ( one incident involved midwife after birth of dd thinking my child was to to be taken into care).

Was placed under extreme scrutiny for months. Because of my own detective work i find out about the alert. Fast forward almost a year, after writing to the trust for answers, they have admitted that the alert should NEVER have been added. The midwife who did so has been given extra training etc. They have apologised, but two midwives that treated me APPALLINGLY after birth of DD are denying their mistakes. One nurse inparticulr is either very unwell or down right NASTY ( think the latter)she is completely denying treating me the way she did.

The trust have, since my complaint, dug deep to find out all they can to justify many ways in which i was treated, such as, saying because i was abused as a child then that will affect my ability to parent my child etc etc. This has all being added to my GP records.

My dh and i have almost been torn apart by all this. Cannot afford a solicitor.

We have since moved out of the area completely but i am now terrified of registering with a GP and having any contact what so ever with a health visitor. I have lost all faith. I have nothing to hide but am sooo frightened and really traumatised.

It seems that as a criminal you are Innocent until proven guilty but as a mother you are guilty until proven innocent.

Thankyou if you got this far. Sorry for bad grammar etc hard to concentrate with dd.

Hope it makes sense.

I was treated for serious mental health problems in my teens, many, many years before falling pregnant with dd1. It was on my health records but it was so long ago it never occurred to me to tell anyone associated with my pregnancy. Anyway I was almost full term when my health visitor phoned me saying she had read my medical records and was very alarmed about my mental health history, why hadn't I told anyone and I would need careful monitoring. I was very upset and started to cry, which I think made her think i could be even more unbalanced than she clearly thought I was.

The phone call was very unsettling, to the extent that I was really worried that my as yet unborn baby would be taken into care. MyDH and I even discussed the idea of divorcing so that he could have custody of the baby if it came to it.

I was also annoyed that the HV had been able to read my medical records without my consent

Luckily the matter was never raised again and I was given a different health visitor (nothing to do with this, I don't think) but it made me very anxious for the next year or so.

Do you really want to pursue this complaint/legal action? It will be beyond stressful.

As I read it, there were two issues - the CP alert and the treatment of you by one nurse. The main one, the one that really matters, is the CP alert and that has already been investigated and found to have been unjustified, they've apologised and you will have some written record of that, if the CP alert is ever mentioned you have the PROOF that it was unjustified and a mistake.

The nurse, as someone else has said its going to be your word against hers, sadly. She was ONE person and really doesnt deserve any space in your head. She is clearly crap at her job and you will not be the only one to have suffered. Hopefully you raising what she said will have alerted her managers to her behaviour - even if it cant be proved.

I really think you should just register with a gp - nothing bad is going to happen, all this talk of forged birth certificates etc is disproportionate. Get some counselling too. Good luck.

You will probably also find that your new gp will be very sympathetic about what has happened to you. Most gps these days are very clued up about mental illness. When you register chose a surgery where there are several drs and say that you want to register with the kindest, gentlest and most understanding one. They won't think that is weird as lots of women only want female drs etc.

Dh wants more children, ds wants a sibling. I've told dh to divorce me so he meet someone so he can have more children with someone else and ds can have a sibling and not be an only child.

That is just too sad for words.
Go and have your new baby at the Portland.
I know of a family who were getting all sorts of hassel from the state school her child was at, the woman could do nothing right and had all sorts of home visits which other people did get for the same "crime" anyway she's moved her child to private school and hasn't had a peek since, the LEA didn't even check the child had actually moved to another school.

other people didn't get sorry

The thing that i've discovered Samay is that if you never register with them, ie the NHS hospital never informs the GP and HV of the birth, you are never on their radar.
Perfect example was when my children all started out at a rubbish private school and then I moved them briefly to a state school to give that a try, the LEA had no idea that children lived in our house and we'd missed out on a number of health checks, free books that sort of thing. The systems do not talk to each other so if you went private for the birth, stayed private for his health care, the first the NHS would know about the baby would be when he/she arrived for state school and you'd just list the private paed as his GP.
If you privately educate all the way through you could be under the radar until 18, which is quite scary actually.

"It only takes one person to think you are hiding somethig for a whole can of worms to cascade open"

It's a classic witchcraft accusation. If you admit and repent, you may be forgiven. If you deny the charge, that's proof it's true.

Unless you're incredibly lucky with witnesses, etc, the accusation is never falsifiable.

Unfortunately the new GP will see your medical history. In general when you register with a GP your notes will be "summarised" onto the practice computer system by an admin person. Whenever you go and see a GP / nurse / midwife at the practice your history will be there for them to see on the computer screen.

This has caused me so many problems as I have been given a mental health diagnosis in the past which has since been discredited. But because it is there in my old notes some admin person has put them on the computer as a current diagnosis.

I have asked the GP to get this inaccurate diagnosis removed, but was told they couldn't remove it (even though it's wrong!), they could only but a note on the computer saying that I have asked for it to be removed!! So frustrating!

I have opted out of having my records added to the new NHS data spine for this reason.

Thanks Samay. I really appreciate you helping me when you are having to deal with so much yourself. I have phoned the surgery back and told them not to forward my notes on. My thinking behind that is that i need some counselling to work things out and i also need to continue with my complaint. After all that, then maybe i will be happy to re register. I am worried now tho that they will send some sort of alert to dd new GP surgery. Im not on any medication, cpa or anything like that, so really, they shoulnt.

Altinkum: If that's the case re the child protection alert, then why is that not explained to the parents? Also, I would really like to look at some policy's and protocols regarding this? I hate the fact that we were not involved in any of it, no decisions were made with our knowledge or consent. How can they do that? We have no history of drugs, violence etc. We are "normal" happily married and fully functional members of society. After a bit of a battle tho, they have noW said the alert should not have been added, so is it standard procedure? I'm confused.

The consequences of that alert and experiences after have been LIFE CHANGING for us. i just don't understand, it makes no sense to me what so ever. Its makes me so sad to think that if you suffer abuse as a child then not only do you have to live with having had that happen to you, but, you also face being labelled a potential abuser to your child in the future. It really is a life sentence .

Also, what seriously worries me, is that some people who scrutinised me as a parent, the only pre requisite was that they had a CRB check!!!! I attend a local baby group at the children's centre and handed in my " membership" card, which i have since found out had the child protection alert come up when scanned. We were never told about this! I enquired to the local council when i put 2 and 2 together. I asked what sort of training do the staff have who have access to this info. The guy, pro udly declared " oh, they must have an enhanced crb check".

It is nothing short of scandalous what is happening!

we opted out also and that was another battle!

MISSFIT, That is what they initially said to me re the child protection alert. They said that it shoul not have been added but they where unable to remove it they said they could just put a note next to it .

I wrote a letter asking to see there policy's, pre action protocols etc and it was then removed.

I would challenge them tbh.

I don't see why your records being forwarded on would be a problem tough. You've done nothing to be ashamed of and there is no reason to think that your new doctor will be anything like the horrible nurse and stupid midwife.

This is not uncommon. Talk to MIND or RETHINK they will have heard it all before. They both have advice lines.

monkeyflippers that's the point: theratpack herself hasn't done anything to be ashamed of, but her record says she has/might.

A paper- or e-identity can gain a life separate from the flesh and blood person it's supposed to be about.

A simple example: your post is nicked, someone uses it to commit identity theft. They apply for credit cards, loans, maybe use it when caught driving uninsured, etc etc. An e-identity of monkeyflippers builds up, and its not pretty. Monkeyflippers then applies for a mortgage - bad credit rating. Monkeyflippers applies for a job -fails CRB check.

Monkeyflippers has done nothing wrong, but e-monkeyflippers follows her around. Each separate database and incident has to be separately challenged by real monkeyflippers, and many database holders will, as above, claim they are unable to make any correction. Even if they believe her, which they won't (because she would say that, wouldn't she?).

Contaminated data is one of the known mega-pitfalls of the database state. An incorrect record can be for life, not just for Christmas.

Samay and theratpack, I'm sorry, I'm not being very upbeat and encouraging here. I so hope things will work out for you both, in spite of all the shit, and that when you take the huge risk of trusting people again you will not be disappointed. Wishing strength and unMNy hugs to the real samay and theratpack, large as life and breathing god's good air whatever those e-imposters are up to!

sorry this is so long butI do know how you feel, but even though I have suffered at the hands of multi-agancies you still need to register to protect your self - what we need is a organisation to stand up for us as it seems politians and departments only speak to organisations.

You do need support talk to the practice manager before registering or the senior GP - ours was started because I had PND after losing my DS who suffered with a genetical disorder 13th cromesome was a triple told I was over nerotic during his pregnancy as I told GP and midwife there was some thing wrong.

If you dont know why request your medical and ss records under the Data Protection Act it will cost but they can not with hold them bcause of the fredom of information Act. then ring Mind and ask if they have an advocate in your area to assist you. hope it goes well pls let me know.

should meanson that you are in for the long haul but you have to remain strong even if you dont feel it - we need to stand together

They might get involved but in my experence of them they would not even though I know exactle which part of the act to use - sorry to be hard you do have to be within a time limit and this is the scare part it is a year from finding out the inaccurate information and 3yrs for medical negligence

Hi Skatingmum.
Thankyou.

Im so so sorry you lost your DS.

I feel alot stronger this week. I have spoken to an organisation called AIMS this week. They are WOUNDERFUL! and are supporting mothers all over the country who have been/ are going through simular situations.
Your right, we do need to stand together!!!!

MIND unfortunalty have, in my opinion been pretty crap.

I am determined to see this through. I WILL NOT GIVE UP. There has not been a single day in the last 18 months that i have not thought about this.

www.aims.org.uk/