To be terrified of registering with GP

[theratpack]

Sorry this is REALLY long:
during booking visit i ticked the box history of mental health problems ( as do 1 in 4 of us at some point in our lives). I naively believed it wouldn't be a problem, and if i needed support i would get kind, compassionate support.

Later i find out that after spending 10 mins with useless midwife at booking visit, she has activated a child protection alert. Suffered LOTS of horrible experiences due to alert ( one incident involved midwife after birth of dd thinking my child was to to be taken into care).

Was placed under extreme scrutiny for months. Because of my own detective work i find out about the alert. Fast forward almost a year, after writing to the trust for answers, they have admitted that the alert should NEVER have been added. The midwife who did so has been given extra training etc. They have apologised, but two midwives that treated me APPALLINGLY after birth of DD are denying their mistakes. One nurse inparticulr is either very unwell or down right NASTY ( think the latter)she is completely denying treating me the way she did.

The trust have, since my complaint, dug deep to find out all they can to justify many ways in which i was treated, such as, saying because i was abused as a child then that will affect my ability to parent my child etc etc. This has all being added to my GP records.

My dh and i have almost been torn apart by all this. Cannot afford a solicitor.

We have since moved out of the area completely but i am now terrified of registering with a GP and having any contact what so ever with a health visitor. I have lost all faith. I have nothing to hide but am sooo frightened and really traumatised.

It seems that as a criminal you are Innocent until proven guilty but as a mother you are guilty until proven innocent.

Thankyou if you got this far. Sorry for bad grammar etc hard to concentrate with dd.

Hope it makes sense.

I just want to add my tuppence as a GP.

Your experience sounds awful and I hope it does not prevent you from establishing a trusting relationship with a new GP. Many GPs are parents, many GPs have suffered mental health problems themselves, all GPs are human.

I agree with the suggestion above about arranging a meeting with the practice manager to discuss your concerns. This will give you a feel for the practice and they may suggest which of the GPs has most experience of/interest in mental health issues.

When you register it may be worth making a double appointment to discuss things with the GP. As mentioned above, your notes will not have arrived by then so you will get a chance to tell your side of the story.

Also, if you don't like the new practice (for whatever reason) you can change to a new one.

Talk to your MP about having this investigated - and re your notes you are entitled to look at them request them and see what they say

I agree that a new GP could react in the same manner when they see the file and not believe the OP. But I think its worth giving a GP a chance. They would hopefully be more professional and take the OP as they find them, new start/clean slate and all that. Maybe I'm too trusting in people but I'd like to think this would be what could happen.

I think i have 2 options. Stand and fight, register with GP, explain situation and hope they have common sense and good judgement ( a big ask in my experience). Continue complaints procedure with the ombudsman etc. ( can i still sue if/when the ombudsman finds SERIOUS fault??).

or

de register or register in altered name without giving previous address. This option will give a fresh start. But i am so concerned, angry and many other emotions, that i sort of want to fight. But, as Vivalebeaver states, the court would no doubt favour the defendant.

A year or so ago, before all this happened i would have said to someone, fight it. But, given the power and level of discrimination, lack of good judgement etc etc that i have experienced from the particular NHS trust, I'm not so sure. Its all very David and Goliath.

Very good luck, whichever you decide. Soooo recognise everything you're saying.

The problem with option 2 is that if it were to come to light that you are avoiding disclosure it may cause a breakdown of trust with your new GP. Trust is hugely important in the GP-patient relationship, arguably more so than with (short term) in-patient scenarios.

Do you have any friends/family who could recommend a GP?

Am not a legal expert but I would think you are entitled to take legal action if the ombudsman finds fault.

Personally, I would be keen to go with option one as it offers you closure. I fully accept that my opinion is biased by my professional interest though.

My brother isn't registered with a GP for similar reasons. He still gets NHS healthcare from walk in centres, a GP surgery where you don't have to register, and secondary care (hospitals) if need be. Lots of people (ie. homeless, asylum seekers) aren't registered with a GP surgery but still receive NHS health care so it isn't usually a problem unless you have a chronic health problem that needs continuing care.

The thing is you don't have to decide straight away. You can de-register from your current surgery for a bit and not re-register until you're ready or you feel you need to. Of course you must register your child as they will need vaccinations and check ups.

I remember your original post about this, and really did feel for you. Sadly, I've had a similar experience, both of completely unnecessary child protection measures and of my subsequent complaint backfiring into more allegations and threats being made against me. So honestly, I understand your fear of registering with a GP now.

However, of all the professionals who could get involved with you now, GPs are probably the least likely to pursue child protection... they are trained to feel autonomous and slightly superior to social workers. Other professionals tend to defer to GPs too, so a confident and sympathetic GP with a firm understanding of how people can recover mental health issues could be your best advocate here. If you're in touch with any mental health groups in your new area, you might be able to ascertain anecdotally which might be a good GP practice to register with.

Looking at it the other way, unfortunately, if you were to decide not to register with a GP but then needed urgent medical care for your children, an A&E doctor might ask you to explain why you hadn't registered them with one. Obviously you're not legally obliged to do so, but you might be leaving yourself open to allegations of neglecting your children's health. So really, I think you will be safer with still registering with a GP, scary as it is...

I dont think the NHS would just create you a new file, i just registered with new GP and had to provide my NHS number

Ooops recover from mental health issues...

I think you need an advocate - someone who will go with you to all medical appointments, mainly as support but also so you have a witness if necessary. I'm in Sydney so unfortunately can't volunteer for the job, but there MUST be an organisation around who could help you. Hospitals often have "patient advocates" who are used to people who have had bad experiences with medical issues.

It might take a few phonecalls and you may get some people puzzled at what you are looking for, but maybe you could try your local hospital as a starting point and someone there could point you in the right direction. Otherwise I could contact Citizens Advice who would know of local voluntary organisations who would be willing to support you. Good luck.

Sounds really horrible for you xx
As someone who works in a child protection team i would say you have nothing to worry about as long as you haven't left an area where your child was on a child protection plan, or had an active worker, your new GP won't make a referral just because of history. Like others have said, meet with the GP and explain your side of what happened, Gp's are generally supportive not judgemental xxx

Breastmilk, is there anything to suggest the OP currently has mental health issues (other than those now caused by the NHS, of course)?

She only states she ticked the box for mental health "history".

Oh, maybe I misunderstood and you're saying the GP should understand that OP has recovered from historic problems.

I'm so sorry that you've had this horrible experience - I really feel for you because I have a history of serious mental health problems and have both Bi-polar and BPD on my health records, again, with a history of childhood abuse.

I too went through pregnancies terrified of putting a foot wrong becuase I was terrified of having my children taken away, but in reality, the majority of healthcare professionals and social workers don't believe this is in anyone's best interests if the family can be supported at home. A care plan was put in place for me 'just in case' as I was high risk for post-natal problem, but when it was apparant that I was okay, it was just quietly shelved.

Firstly, I think you are incredibly brave, but I agree with other posters that long term it won't help, and in the case of any future problems would probably go against you if you don't register your family, as it would likely be seen as acting against your child's interests.

Secondly, my personal experience has been that the longer I have been stable, the better my 'record' gets iyswim. Obviously I don't know your personal circumstances, or the nature of your MH issues, but if you are ok at the moment, and can present a GP record that backs you up with evidence of a long period of stability, this will help immensely in batting away any accusations of incapability in the future.

For me, the longer I was stable, the better my GP was able to distance the MH issues from my ongoing day to day life, to the point where now it is regarded as something firmly in my past.

The other thing to bear in mind is that most GP's will happily support you and your family through any episodes of MH, as long as you are upfront and ask for help.

I'm so sorry that this incompetent bunch and this wicked woman have done so much damage, but please believe me when I tell you that there are many many smart compassionate HC professionals and GPs who won't discriminate, but will bend over backwards to do their best by you.

Lastly have you had any counselling to deal with this, as it sounds like you really need somewhere to get some emotional support and to have somewhere to safely 'put' all these feelings. You can do this privately with no GP contact - I don't have details on me now, but can post some links if you are interested?

Again, I'm so sorry and really feel for you.

theratpack, please be mindful of the fact that using a slightly different name might not prevent your details from being associated with a previous registration. In general terms, and I'm sure you can understand why, the NHS doesn't want you to assume a new identity and some effort will be put into finding your old details (not least because we don't want two PCTs paying two practices to look after you, so at a minimum de-register from the old one first - by phoning your old PCT as samay says). You can de-register simply 'at patient choice'.

OTOH you have had a devastating experience at the hand of NHS professionals. Enough to put anyone off for life. So priority one is to register your dd so she isn't missed for any relevant screening and vax programmes (obv if you don't want the vaccinations that's a different issue and you are entitled to your opinions on that). But you're unlikely never to need a GP for the rest of your life, so the issue will probably have to be tackled at some point. Doesn't have to be now, however. If you have no immediate health needs you could wait til dd is over 5 and out of the purview of HVs.

It feels like you may need counselling for the experiences you've been through. Ironically accessing a GP would be the simplest way to achieve that but it might be better to pay and stay within your comfort zone? You should be mindful of the cervical screening programme, though, I'm sure you want to be in that. If you're recently screened you have some time to decide what to do.

Do GPs actually read old notes? I'm surprised! I thought they just shoved them in a drawer and only had a quick shufti to check for past history if you visited and said ouch my athletes foot/depression/tonsillitis/whatever has returned. I'd just join a local surgery without any fanfare whatsoever and access any health care you need as necessary.

It's possible that PALS (patient advice and liaison service) link here: www.pals.nhs.uk/ would be able to help. They are set up specifically to deal with complaints for any aspect of nhs service.

Very sorry to hear your story - I hope you find justice for yourself and your family.

I wonder if the GP would even look at the old notes, every time I go to see mine it's as if he's never laid eyes on me before and with 4 children we aren't strangers to them.

you are perfectly entitled to use your maiden name and change your childrens names if you wish. people do this all the time, because they meet a new partner, get divorced, whatever

i cant see why this should make your Gp not " trust" you

lots of people lose their cards and do not know their NHS number. people move to the UK from abroad all the time and have no notes

Sorry - my only point was that this may not prevent the previous details from being found, not that the OP was not entitled to use her maiden name (as I do) or some combination thereof.

What a living nightmare
I think you need counselling of some sort for this.
I also think you should get your old notes from previous gps firstand check them and amend if neccesary.
Then you should scout around and interview the best gp practice to suit you and your needs.
Make a double appointment at a few practices and then see.

Good luck

Thankyou all for your contributions and your support x

I really do need counselling to help deal with this, as well as advocacy to help me pursue my complaint and clear our names.

Its so hard to know where to go. Especially when all my trust has gone.

I have phoned old GP surgery and the person i spoke too has said they are automatically sending mine and dh notes to surgery that we have registered dd at. She told me they do his automatically as they like to keep families all together????

Also, just to clarify. DD is not part of any cp plan and we dont have an active worker.

Could you give rough location here, or post on MN local (with namechange if you want)?

Someone might be able to recommend a local GP who has been good with them - mine is lovely, and I'd recommend her in a second, if you're in the S. Birmingham area! I think getting an understanding GP will be half the battle.