to think new posters shouldn't be ridiculed?

[spikeycow]

I'm not being unreasonable in any way, I'm just getting sick of new posters who aren't sure of the way the land lies getting ripped into by threads full of frothing "I'm better than you because I can spell" up their arse Mumsnetters. Being able to spell or not means nothing. Do people really think they are superior over someone just because they can spell better? Newsflash: you aint.
Now froth away, I'm not wrong so don't give a shit

See - have been around for a while now and still don't know how to use strike outs/bold etc properly!! Obviously still haven't researched Mumsnet properly!

Some things are scary. I have seen people flame posters when they have actually misread or misinterpreted their post. They just get straight on their soap box and go for the jugular without due consideration. These people are the mothers of the future generation - that is very very scary at times.
Fortunately I have seen great tenderness and understanding when posters are having a dreadful time and that is what makes Mumsnet a great place.
It can also be a great laugh which is all that is needed for many of us a lot of the time.

YNABU

Twats a plenty on mumsnet

I can see it as "scary" yes sometimes. There are many people who post online because they don't have a proper support system at home friends and fmaily etc so the people online become their friends.. and unlike with real friends they can be as abusive as they like from the comfort of their own home.

Also as many don't start using mumsnet untill they are new mums, pregnant or TTC they are also likely to be quite emotional.

On one of my first threads I was labelled thick for having a cockney accent. Apparently if you don't speak Queens English you'll get nowhere in life and be judged forever. Someone was having a tantrum because a nursery worker dropped her aitches in front of the children. It didn't really put me off because it's so funny

You're only thick if your actually from Essex and put it on.. God that winds me up. married to a bit of a mockney

How do people hear your accent in forum like this?

she must have said she speaks with a cockney accent

Yes I said I was cockney because people were whinging about cockney accents. God forbid their child might hear one

I wouldn't know if someone is new to MN though. I don't ever look people up and see what else they have posted etc so I wouldn't be especially careful what I say to a new MNer IYSWIM. I don't feel anyone really should be ridiculed for spelling etc but that's MN, sometimes going for the jugular, sometimes nasty backbiting and piling on top of one person.

Sometimes it is very funny, often it is quite helpful. I think it is just the way it is tbh. People periodically post that they don't like this kind of thing but it continues nonetheless IME

Well I'm new to MN waves

So far no-one's taken the pee out of my spelling and grammar...though it's reasonably ok anyway. I do think it's one of the most aggressive forums I've ever seen though Lmao!! Having said that, I suppose it depends on the thread and the level of feeling towards the subject.

Probably not for the faint hearted or 'thin skinned' but I have to say some people who I've seen getting a good flaming, appear to post every minute detail of a problem and then get the hump when the opinions posted don't suit them.

My advice is don't ask if you're being unreasonable if you really don't want to know the answer

YANBU I'm a newbee and I have been lurking for a while. I would love to just jump in and post but after seeing how some posters are I have been wary. I shouldn't be but I am.

I am new too :D i havnt actually done my own post in here but have replied on a couple - it is a scary forum but after spending a few days reading it i think i can hack it - and if i cant ill switch my laptop off

The thread you're talking about disgusted me. People were so GLEEFUL about jumping in and having a go at her. I could almost see them rubbing their hands together. Horrible.

YANBU

There is a difference between robust discussion and just being unpleasant, but there are some who don't seem to be able to make the distinction.

Derailing threads so they become about your point rather than what the OP wanted help with or to discuss. Picking up on spelling and grammar when it doesn't help the context of the discussion or just generally being patronising to new posters are all de rigeur for some.

Shame really as the site can be fantastic. If it wasn't then we wouldn't be here.

It never occured to me to lurk when I first started using MN. I just posted.
If I'd held back and lurked for a bit it would have scared me too.
There are some bitches on here but I just avoid their threads. I name change quite a lot too so that helps if I get in a spat with one .

the derailed threads are usually the ones I like best, they tend to be the fun ones

See I'm the total opposite lol. I would never change my name if I got in a spat with someone. I have quite strong opinions and I don't see the point in not posting them really since that's what forums are all about. I can quite easily have a clash of opinions with someone on one subject, and totally agree with them on another one...there's no need for personal nastiness, life's too short

I've been here for 2ish months now and MN isn't as bad as the media portrays it. I've been amazed at some of the opinions (you must be XYZ if you vote tory or labour or whatever) and so touched by the support shown to people in difficulty. I've howled with laughter more than once too!

I like it here. Must say I haven't seen too much of the "new MNers are scum" type comments though!

YANBU - Being new to MN it has completely put me off posting on AIBU.

I have had some great support on Primary Edducation though and I do love to watch a good old bun fight

I'm new to Mumsnet and have been suspiciously questioned on the surrogacy thread because I haven't declared myself and given background to who I am. Some regular posters seem to be very wary of new posters who dont stick to baby names or telly addicts for a probationary period.

you don't have to be new to be suspuciously questioned though lol!
There was a spate of trolls for a while I remember, not so long ago. Someone who had never posted before coming on and posting something contentious or upsetting etc and it turned out to be directed by a group on another website - sort of enemy invasion or something like that. I never really understood it.

Everyone is new to MN sometime and you have to decide how you want to tackle it. Never occured to me to lurk for a while and get the feel of the place, being a natural blabbermouth - but I can see why people might do that. Or just stick to a few "safer" topics - arts and crafts for instance or something fairly non-controversial-

People are name-changing all the time though and you don't know who is who anyway most of the time so I really don't see how you can have a policy on how to treat newbies IYSWIM.

you can also look for a niche, some regular chat thread with a theme to it that fits you in some way and keep bumping into the same people on it. Off-hand I can't think of an example ....

will have a look

things like one child families, multicultural families, pets, language/bilingualism, book of the month, etc sort of thing where the same people keep posting and you get to know them a bit.