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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Calling all drivers AIBU

58 replies

reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:27

Am not a driver myself so genuinely do not know if IABU.My exh is due to pick DD up for her Christmas stay on Friday but DD may be in the final of a competition on Monday we won't find out till Friday pm if she is or not.He was intending on driving down with his wife on Friday. He is now saying that they can't come on Saturday morning (as suggested if DD doesn't make the final) as he would have to do the 7 hour round journey as this is too long a drive not to share? ( he is a driving instructor by trade)and she will have to wait till Monday.AIBU to think he could drive on his own without being a danger?

OP posts:
Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:31

Sorry should have stated as his wife is working the weekend.

OP posts:
MerrilyDefective · 15/12/2010 20:31

If she's in the final,will he be staying to watch?
Surely if she is in the final on Monday then he'd have to bring her back for it? Confused

nzshar · 15/12/2010 20:31

Yep 7 hours is too long I wouldn't do it on my own but others may disagree. I always find about 5 hours then I start losing concentration and that is not a good thing!

Yulephemia · 15/12/2010 20:31

7 hours is a bloody long drive, especially at this time of year with few hours of daylight and the mad weather we've had recently.
I wouldn't do it.
YABU

MorticiaAddams · 15/12/2010 20:32

YABU 7 hours is a long drive. 3 1/2 hours is bad enough but to turn round and go straight back would be hell on earth for me.

KirstyJC · 15/12/2010 20:33

7 hours is too long I think. Sorry!

JaneS · 15/12/2010 20:33

They recommend you should not drive more than 2 -2.5 hours without a break, actually. I might drive 7 hours on my own but it would be a strain and if the roads are icy or it's dark, it would be really hard. It would be a poor example for a driving instructor to set and he is probably more aware of the risks than most. Can he get the train?

To be honest, although he may be being arsey for the sake of it, I think you have to accept he's telling you he thinks he can't do the drive safely. Sad

JaJaBinks · 15/12/2010 20:33

YABU,

Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:33

sorry realise the post makes no sense. He is collecting her to take her away to his house till christmas eve.If she is in the final this is a non issue but if not then I can't see the problem with him driving alone on the saturday to give her longer with them.

OP posts:
Poledra · 15/12/2010 20:35

Agree with the others, it's along drive to do on your own. I have driven 6 hours on my own, but it was in summer, so much easier. I wouldn't want to do it at this time of year. Sorry.

Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:36

OK thou for the replies as I said I genuinely didn't know as I don't drive.He would never get on the train doesn't do public transport Xmas Grin

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 15/12/2010 20:37

YABU.

a 4 hour round trip, maybe, but 7 is too much, and could potentially be dangerous, IMO.

nzshar · 15/12/2010 20:37

Neither do i Xmas Grin

GetOrfMoiLand · 15/12/2010 20:37

YABU. 7 hours is a bloody long drive on your own.

Why would this make you say that all drivers are unreasonable fgs?

Can you not meet him halfway on the Saturday so he has less of a drive?

nzshar · 15/12/2010 20:37

do public transport that is

wintersnuffle · 15/12/2010 20:39

Is there any way you could get public transport with your DD and meet him halfway?
I wouldn't do a 7 hour trip on my own at the best of times and I think there might be some interesting weather this weekend.

Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:40

GETORF I never said all drivers are unreasonable I meant calling all drivers to ask if I was being unreasonable am vv Blush if it read another way sorry

OP posts:
BertieBottlesOfMulledWine · 15/12/2010 20:41

I don't think she was, GOML. I think she missed out a colon in the thread title.

Calling all drivers: AIBU?

TinselInDisgrace · 15/12/2010 20:41

I've often done 6-8 hour drives on my own. I just plan it to take a couple of breaks. I regularly do an 8-10 hour (depending on traffic) roundtrip commute in one day. Again, it just means I have to take breaks and sit reading crappy magazines in service station coffee shops. ExP used to do a 6-8 hour drive regularly to pick up DS, stay in a hotel and then drive back the next day (with DS). He'd do the same on the return leg. Now we live closer he does the 5 hour round trip in one day.

However, I would never insist that anyone do it. ExP doesn't mind the driving and volunteers for it. It would be utterly unreasonable to insist that your ExH does the whole journey in one day when he's made it clear he doesn't feel that he could do it.

GetOrfMoiLand · 15/12/2010 20:42

Grin oh yes I see what you mean now.

I was just thinking 'eh? why would that be unreasonable?'

Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:42

I would offer to get the train and have done in the past but am a bit skint at the moment and he makes no contribution at all (another post another time Smile

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 15/12/2010 20:43

DP would drive for 7 hours. I would think about it in summer, but emphatically not this time of year, with shitty weather conditions and it getting dark so early.

Original poster
reinitindear · 15/12/2010 20:43

oops at my missing colon Grin

OP posts:
JaneS · 15/12/2010 20:45

Well he should get the train! I'm afraid I am sniggering rudely at someone who 'doesn't do public transport'. Hmm

It's really odd how tiring driving is - you're sitting down, fairly relaxed, yet somewhere along the way it is quite hard work.

EmmaBemma · 15/12/2010 20:45

I regularly drive 7 hours on my own. In good visibility with no rain/snow etc it's no big deal so long as I take a break in the middle, but last winter I did it during the big cold snap before Christmas and it was snow/ice/blizzards, and a total nightmare (and more like 12 hours). Supposed to be similarly bad weather this weekend.

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