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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not sure why it rankles

147 replies

ARepleteHmmSkiNun · 01/12/2010 23:11

Hello I changed my name as I only post on other boards. Not that I post very often anyway. I don't generally feel the need to comment or ask advice but I find myself thinking about something too much in my opinion. I don't really know why and it annoys me.
Anyway I went to a neighbour's house to ask them something. They tend to keep themselves to themselves but are ok. I spent about 20 minutes there discussing this and that, questions, answers, bit of humour all the normal stuff. Anyway the husband mentioned something about cricket. I don't know anything about cricket really and told an old joke about Pakistan and the world cup, which was actually a joke about football which I know just as little about. Then her husband told some joke about flying carpets exploding which I must admit I don't quite remember. Anyway she gave her husband one of those looks (often given by those who are a bit socially insecure to their significant other when actually directing their comments at the other person in the room but looking for support and agreement from their partner - do you know what I mean?) and said that Peter (their son of about 13) would say that what her husband said was racist and that you can learn from young people you know. The husband and I continued the conversation without reference to her point as I, and perhaps him, felt a little embarrassed, because it quite obviously begged the question from me as to why it was racist.

So the point being, imo she was being particularly English and indirect/dishonest and accusing me of being racist. I certainly am not. I think she is the type of person who is very quick to find offence on other people's behalf when none exists, cetainly not detectable by the sort of person she assumes she is "protecting"
I do dislike dishonesty, hypocrisy and the type of naive liberalism (the type of liberalism which is derived from a general social theory of being "nice" but actually never rigorously looks at the consequences of its actions) which seems common nowadays.
Am I reading too much into this? I don't know why it rankles. Perhaps I shouldn't find it offensive to be called a racist by a person who is too stupid to realise she is racist, but perhaps it is better to let such things go in a casual social encounter with one's neighbours. Perhaps it rankles because I should have brought her up on it and asked her why she thought that but I only popped round to ask something and didn't want to get drawn into a long political/sociological discussion.

OP posts:
Hullygully · 02/12/2010 14:20

Wasn't she Ghanaian?

And a man?

When the truth came out there was an uproar and a furore.

Lydwatt · 02/12/2010 14:27

A black, cross-dressing Emmeline Pankhurst doing dodgy racist jokes at the stand-up mike...Xmas Grin

I actually think I am going to wet myself....!

thumbplumpuddingwitch · 02/12/2010 14:27

So OP's name is an anagram of Emmeline Pankhurst - so now what?

Hullygully · 02/12/2010 14:31

In my country we have a saying.

Lydwatt · 02/12/2010 14:34

does it involve a picnic and a missing sandwich?

tethersjinglebellend · 02/12/2010 14:37

I my country we have a dance.

Ormirian · 02/12/2010 14:39

The blimey was my channeling my inner Pearly Queen Grin

And an exclamation based on the fact that yes, IMO, the OP was reading too much int the occurence. In spades.

LoopyLoops · 02/12/2010 14:42

In my country we have a lot of in-breds with big ears living in palaces.

Hullygully · 02/12/2010 14:42
Hullygully · 02/12/2010 14:42

And we have Bran.

thumbplumpuddingwitch · 02/12/2010 14:42

Ahh - I thought you were commenting on my post where I had asked if I was reading too much into the situation - but you weren't - in which case your post makes perfect sense and I should stop being so self-absorbed.Xmas Blush

Have we worked out who the troll OP is yet?

thumbplumpuddingwitch · 02/12/2010 14:43

I agree with Bran.

And Hullygully.

but mostly Bran.

Ormirian · 02/12/2010 14:43

In my house we have a bath.

Hullygully · 02/12/2010 14:45

Show off

MaDugHerDecsOut · 02/12/2010 14:45

Not the brightest crayon in the knife drawer!

Lydwatt · 02/12/2010 14:48

ooo...ooo, is that another saying..?

Lydwatt · 02/12/2010 14:49

I need to get me one of these countries you all have.....Xmas Hmm

MIFLAW · 02/12/2010 16:03

In Gambia we have a saying; "if you have a lunatic in your village, encourage her to post on a UK-based parenting forum so you can get on with your life in peace"

Hullygully · 02/12/2010 16:30

In my country we have a safety pin

Ormirian · 02/12/2010 16:36

Who's showing off now hully?

Hullygully · 02/12/2010 16:39

It's only a small and tarnished one

Lydwatt · 02/12/2010 16:44

ok, I'm back and have a country now and its all pink and glittery...

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