for feeling smug when mothers of school-agers describe themselves as "Full-time mums" or "Housewives"?

[CareeringAlong]

Name change...

Following from the threads about life at home when you don't do voluntary of paid work, although your children are of school-age, I was wondering if anyone else who does work can't help feeling a tad superior? Oh yes, I know I'll be flamed for this, but there it is.

These housewives seem to do all the things that working mothers do (cooking, cleaning, planning etc, etc, etc) but don't have any purpose outside of this. They seem to think that doing the supermarket shopping is a reasonable replacement for a 'real' career. I can't help but feel prejudiced against them.

I'm currently a SAHM as DD is pre-school, but will do paid (and voluntary) work as soon as she's in school. I'm looking forward to building-up my career again and working for the family.

Oh, and before anyone jumps on this, I've always cooked decent-quality meals from scratch, even when I worked v. long hours; my dogs are walked in the early hours; and my house is always clean and tidy. I argue that ironing is for losers, however!

OK. Hard hat on!

I agree bunbaker. I did a good few years work before my first DD at age 30. I travelled to 8 different countries and lived and worked in several different ones and worked hard for my money, independance and education. I would be interested to know what job you are in OP to feel so smug about and about your life experiences that make you look down on the SAHM'

Well I sort of agree with the OP. Apologies and all that but I honestly can't see why women (or men) can't work and have children. I mean why can't they? It's honestly not impossible. If I can do it, anyone can.

So I sort of think a bit of laziness is coming into play. A little bit of laziness is good for the soul of course, but too much of it can be bad for one.

I suppose I have to caveat by saying that parents of SN children are exempted from my judginess. And disabled parents. And parents who've been either so abominably successful in their careers pre-children that they never have to work again. Or those with massive trust funds. Not forgetting of course those parents who have been diagnosed with clinical lazyitis and are henceforward exempted from ever having to do a day's work again.

I know exactly what you mean Valium! Good luck with your course .

I would love to be a sahm, but as have previously said I work pt, which means actually I have no career prospects and I don't see my children/have time to myself so I have all the shit that goes with working plus all the childcare etc when not at work. Wehey! For us it is a financial choice - I can't afford a full time job but we can't afford for me not to work. I would love to say I was smug and sahm, but I am stuck working for someone else, etc etc etc. Obviously the sarcasm of my previous post didn't come out!

I don't feel 'smug' but I also don't understand how SAHM's don't go nuts with boredom once their children are at school full time.

Having said that, it's their choice.

if two individuals living off one wage and not drawing from benefits.if that woman never claims it is cost neutral to state eg no benefits paid.no cost borne.no state intervention.no need to means test or set a criteria

every adult who claims benefits incurs a cost to the state,eg benefits paid by state.they will therefore likely to have comply with govt benefit regs.and if the regs change they need to continue to meet criteria

if state pays financial benefits,it can and will set eligibility criteria.and as at moment set criteria and threshold for claiming benefits eg savings limit

one is a non state financial arrangement
the other is a state involved financial arrangement

and when public purse involved,public and politicians have opinions on how benefits are distributed and spent

Oh Dear !
If you are happy and fulfilled in what you do why would you feel the need to put down others ?
I love my career -when I had DC I took a year off with each and returned to work on a very partime basis,DP looked after the DC whilst I was at work.I think there is a huge difference between "a job" and a career. I dont just go to work for money -Its exciting to feel I am progressing and my chosen career has lifelong learning at its centre
I loved being mostly at home when my DC were little but i didnt see it as a longterm thing-if others do -fine -totally up to you we are all different and get satisfaction doing different things.

To the op, yes you are indeed being anti-women because the role that you are putting down is most often occupied by women.

Thefentiger makes a very valid point. If you were happy and fulfilled you would not come on here and put down other posters.

Is the OP Samantha Cameron?

Has she said was he smuggington job is?

Does she pick them up from school every day as well as drop them off?

What does she do with them in the holidays/illness?

having an opinion isnt antiwoman,nor is op antiwomen.should we only be affirmative and puppies

mn is heaving with women disagreeing with each other,thats not necessarily antiwomen

I think the OP is Sinitta.

Or Kate Middleton's mum's friend Marjery.

She is a div, whoever she is.

some people never mature and you see so much evidence of it the more you mature and experience all sorts that life has to offer us all. shame really as it only makes me feel for the children they are bringing into this world - that's why the human race never really improves. personally I envy those working mums and sahm who manage everything with ease.

enjoy feeling smug op. after all don't we all have our own smug moments whether working outside the home or not.

Quattro - just because it is possible to work and have children, that doesn't mean it is the right thing for everyone. I didn't choose this life because I am lazy, I chose it because I think it is what works best for my family. I like what I do and I don't think it is less important than my previous paid employment.

When my youngest starts school, I will most definitely not be bored. I will have time to decorate my house, go to the gym, read books, learn French. I will get all the domestic stuff done, so that when my DC come home from school I can do nice things. The school day flies by and I can think of stacks of things to do during it.

I know my choices are not for everyone, but on the whole it works for me.

its me.aye honest tae god it is

whoops forgot to say doors to manual

PS: Jolly good luck with building up that career again after 4 years out, when both children are in school, it's so easy to find a job that fits in with childcare, after school activities, illness and holidays. With hubby drop everything from his mega minted job to go look after them? Or will it be you?

When you have done that Ms Smuggy Smugtons come back and have a chat with us and tell us all about it. We wait with baited breath to her all about it.

And one last thing, I bet the charity that gets you doing some voluntary work will be so thrilled to have such a sniffy smug snob making judgements all day long.

I have been a WOHM since my DS was 7 months old and now he is 3, am a SAHM. I don't quite get it but have found that I get a hell of a lot less done than I ever did when I was working full time. There is a bit of a timewarp that you enter as a SAHM is all I can conclude, where your days get subsumed into goopy nothingness. It's horrible actually.

Have we all agreed that it's horses for courses yet?

Or should I check back later?

haha when is that going to happen?cold day hell.

I haven't been on a wo/sa hm thread for ages

Had forgotten what fun they are

I used to live in a hole in t'middle of the road...

Did Xenia come on?

Or was it just Sinitta being enigmatic?

Oh, I am with Quattro. Get a job you idle buggers, and stop wasting your time baking cakes for the school bake sale.