to expect that when you borrow someone's car

[tummysgoingslowly]

for a long weekend away, which saves you hiring a car, that you'd fill the tank (or mostly fill it) with fuel before returning it?

yanbu

perhaps they forgot?

or have given a thank you gift already?

YANBU - the times when I have done this I have ensured that not only has the car got a full tank, but it has also been cleaned inside and out.

Need more info, like how much petrol was in the tank already, and who was borrowing from who, etc. Also whether there was a prior favour done by the borrower.

But generally, no, YANBU.

Sometimes if people are inconsiderate they leave the same amount is as there was when they picked it up?

I think that it should be returned full, even it had far less in it than when they borrowed it. Some people are mean and rude though.

I lent it to the guy I was seeing to go on a boys weekend. It had about 1/4 of a tank in it, and got it back just under 1/4 of a tank. I asked where the full tank was, he was genuinely confused and asked "But it was the same as I got it?"

Was having a discussion about it this morning with a friend (no longer seeing the guy - different story) who thought it was my expectation and not normal behaviour to return it with more fuel/ full tank.

ah, so he replaced the fuel he'd used, but you were expecting a full tank as a thank you for letting him use the car?

I would expect ome sort of thank you, certainly. Did you get anything at all? Any thanks or a pressie or something?

Yes I was expecting more fuel as a gesture of thanks. To be fair when he borrowed it he brought around some croissants. And afterwards a text saying "thanks, he had a great weekend". But that's it.

To me, it seems that you'd ensure that the person doing the favour was not out of pocket at all, including compensating for doing without the car for the weekend.

My friend disagrees.

If my boyfriend was using my car I wouldn't have any expectation of how much fuel would be in it when I got it back, so long as it wasn't completely empty - but I guess it would depend on your relationship & how you normally pay for things. I think if he was only a casual b/f and he returned it with the same amount of petrol in it that it had when he took it - I wouldn't have given it another thought - life is give & take isn't it? 'Thank you' would do for me.

I lent my car to a friend once and had to go and collect it myself several days after it was meant to be returned. Petrol in the tank? You must be joking. I never lent anything to her again though.

Was it you who thought he was going on a lads weekend when he'd actually borrowed it to go to see the other girl he was shagging? If so, then he needed his nuts cut off and it had nothing to do with the petrol! If not... as you were :)

I think the croissants were the thank you and were actually good enough. And if you'd wanted the tank filled, you should've agreed this as a condition of him borrowing the car. He's not a mind reader, and he did say thank you after all.

So I think YABslightlyU.

ChippingIn - what a memory you have!! Yes it was me and this was him.

Just still apportioning blame to him and figuring out how much of a general arse he is as well

I think it depends of the relationship. I wouldn't expect DH to fill up my car, I would expect a sibling to return the car without smashing it up, I would expect an acquaintance to fill up and possibly take to car wash.

Although I did borrow my mums car once, with a full tank and returned it empty. Thanks Mum, if you're reading!

Cheeky buggers.
Just ask Judge Judy,she'll tell 'em.

No hire fee,no petrol,no tax,(insurance?),no wear and tear?

He paid the £40 for the extra insurance.

I'm just curious as to what is a normal expectation and what is my own unstated expecation.

expectation

How put out were you for the weekend?

TBH I would have expected to return it with the same - infact I have done this when borrowing a friends car briefly. Of course she also got a huge thank you and a bunch of flowers (she is a flower-aholic!).

I would not have thought the petrol is unreasonable really.

But I think you need to stop apportionaing blame now, the guy was a major twunt, the small stuff is nothing compared to the big thing. Time to move on somehow really.

Not much to be fair (too skint to do anything). But that's for me to decide and I don't think should have an impact on any gesture of gratitude on the borrower's part.

I lent it as a genuine gesture of kindness, without any (or so I thought) ulterior motive - but it may be that I have unspoken expectations that others don't see as normal

I would just expect there to be the same amount of petrol in it as there was when I handed it over. I would be shocked- but pleased - if they filled the tank.

Sorry x posted

WHP you are right (why do I still get tempted to contact him! ). It's just that my friend said this morning that I was a bit unreasonable to expect the fuel, although she freely admits the rest was twuntage

er, not if he didn't collect it with a full tank in it. why would he fill it up to return it if there was only 1/4 tank when he got it?

YABU.

YABU.

Why lend a car to someone who is cheating on you?

I would expect the same or a bit more, not a full tank (unless it was full or nearly full to start with). It costs £80 to fill my tank!