A good job there aren't many men on MN

[Truckulent]

I think men would be shocked at the level of resentment leveled at them on MN. Almost a seething mass of contempt at times.

I'm a man, been on here for years. And I was surprised by it.

AIBU to think it's a good job there aren't many men on here, or would more men posting help men and women understand each other better?

I name changed for this-i mainly post on lone parents as I am one. And there isn't a lot of advice out there for lone fathers, so it has been helpful.

Personally I think MN is brilliant, the feminism section is a real eye opener.

I think there is a small number of posters who post rather agressively and ocntinually, attacking men who dare to post or attacking poster's partners. IMO they give women a bad name, I find it embarrassing and wish they would stop but TBH I don't think they will as they are the type that just like to argue. About everything. And REFUSE to see logic or reason. (I'm thinking of a couple of specific threads for this, where I was shocked by the vitriolic hatred spewing forth from this woman's posts.)

so do I Trillian, so do I. But the OP pissed me off and I thought I may as well fit into his stereotype....bunch of vipers doncha know?

I am at the title on Discussions of the day:

"Injection of testosterone - on Mumsnet?"

If a man reads some of the posts on here and can't distinguish between the many "my husband is an arse" and the few "all husbands are arses", then they are probably a bit too sensitive.

Man up!!

This forum is for anyone and welcomes honesty at all times, I feel that's much better than a forum that's all hugs and bullshit.

There are women on here?!

This is the last time I'll ever type naked.

well quite TechLovingDad.
And also between what you said and the many, many 'My normally lovely husband is being an arse in this particular instance' posts.

Beachcomber -

love this:

"they had better not tell me I'm wrong about predominantly gendered issues and experiences such as childbirth or feminism."

Truckulent

re your OP: "I think men would be shocked at the level of resentment leveled at them on MN. Almost a seething mass of contempt at times.

Try this:

I think men would be shocked at the level of resentment levelled at women in the real world. Almost a seething mass of contempt most of the time at times.

In response to the title - I disagree.

I think men on MN are a good thing.

It helps that they are fairly self-selecting for the sort of men who I do enjoy talking to.

NurseSunshine, when you see a man acting a certain way do you think 'that gives men a bad name'? Because you can only extrapolate a particular woman's actions to 'giving women a bad name' if you think women are an indistinguishable group, and not a collection of individuals.

In other words, that's utter nonsense.

My DH is like most, I suppose: a normal human being who is occasionally fucking infuriating. Just like me, in other words. But when he read a random thread on MN, he was shocked at what he read and I in turn was shocked at his reaction. He thought most of the posters were total harpies. I, on the other hand, identified with nearly all of them. I must be suppressing an awful lot for the sake of marital harmony!

BreconBeBuggered - that relates to a point made some weeks back by a poster who perceived there to be a much more "aggressive" tone on MN amongst women than he had ever encountered in real life.

I think MN is a healthy place to exchange views but far too many take things personally and are quite alienating in their positions - i.e. all Tories are the Devil incarnate, all people on benefits are scroungers etc etc...

A general rule along the lines of saying no more or less than you would in real life and we'd all get along better, in my view.

I don't have a problem with this being a mixed gender site but I had a weird moment yesterday.

I was on a thread about fantasies and there was the usual debauched cheery banter. It is the only place I talk about such stuff and it makes me giggle and then a male poster asked me a direct question. And I can't answer it. It was not an out of line question and probably says more about the things in my head, but it surprised me.

The vast majority of us regularly stand up for good men, I'm sure that if the tables were turned, then most men would stand up for good women.
I do think, however, that some women on here don't see that not all women are decent human beings and will make sympathetic noises towards women when they would be baying for the blood of similar men.

Seething mass of contempt?
I have not seen any posts where op says sh comes home and does the housework whilst cooking tea and then watches dc whilst she has a hot bath. And that the responses have been to divorce the Bastard.

You will see comments negative to men if he has been a Twat. Deservedly so.

I sometimes think that being a good man isn't enough, Mal, anything but a perfect man will get a pasting on some issues.

If anyone has a perfect man, can they please give me his number?

I love my dh very much but as someone else said, he can be fucking infuriating sometimes.

As can I.

I am a man. I have views. I have opinions. I like some women. I like some men. I can't stand some women. I can't stand some men. Some others views I find abhorrent. Some others views I applaud. We are all different,there are some members of society who are truly awful but on the whole these are in the minority. The majority of people respect one another and behave in a mature responsible way.
This forum embraces a wide diversity of differing views and opinions, some views are quite vitriolic others are supportive and thought provoking. But lets try and remember that this is the internet, if you don't like what you read respond in a constructive way or ignore it. If there is a fire and you pour petrol on you will end up with a conflagration. (By the way, I am a jolly nice fellow)

There is a clique of man haters on MN who seem to have license to do and say whatever the hell they like.

Personal insults, group intimidation of new posters, thread hijacking if they dont like the way the debate is going.

Until MNHQ do something about it, I dont think the site can really call itself 'by parents for parents', TBH.

That said - its a great site :)

I'm a man (in case the username wasn't clear ) and I have no problem with Mumsnet as it is, for all that I'm more of a lurker than regular poster. I also actually try and avoid threads that my wife posts on, in order to spare my feelings give her some space and privacy.

However, and I say this as a man, I too would generally blame the man in many of the relationship issues! As a gender we need to realise that we've (literally) got away with murder (rape, sexploitation, etc) in the past 8 or so millenia and that's not OK.

Interesting.

MN is a female dominated site and nowt wrong with that. Why shouldn't women have a space where they can say what they like without having to pander to a male viewpoint?

Now what I find 'offensive' (if offensive is the right word, it doesn't prey on my mind or anything) is the number of posts excusing all sorts of nonsense on the grounds that so-and-so is a man and therefore 'can't help it' because 'that's what men are like'.

As a man who posts on here I'd agree with the op.
It is noticable, but you'd do well to note who the poster is and then soon enough you'll see that it's not a host of comments from a huge number of different posters, but rather a significant minority who repeat the same views.

It mainly comes in the form of dump him/that sounds like emotional abuse to me/ do you think he'll turn violent? when responding to a thread about a fairly innocuos argument. Or a general disdain for men which will greet the fuck ups of one man as being evidence of our sins as a gender, which is ironic in a way as these are the same posters who will complain if any advertisements or other campaign seeks to treat women as one homogenous mass.
And as mentioned before there are those who will blame the actions or irrational decisions of a woman as the fault of the man. In a situation which is clearly unreasonable from the woman e.g. my husband wants to play football this weekend but I want him to do Y / my husband enjoys playing violent games on the ps3, I've told him I hate them but he still plays them. There will be responses of "what a selfish prick. He knows how you feel, and even if your feelings are unreasonable he should respect them and not choose his hobby over his family." when a similar situation with roles reversed will get the response of "his insecurities/unreasonable feelings should not control you. go out and enjoy yourself. Sounds like passive aggressive controlling behaviour to me." etc.

But as I say at the start, for the most part it is the same posters who repeat these things and look to invent emotional abuse where there is none. For the most part it's pretty balanced.

Are you saying some posters shouldn't be able to say what they like ? then whats the fucking point of an open forum?

Perhaps you should go somewhere a bit more heavily moderated so you don't get exposed to views you don't like.

Who is in the clique of man haters?

In answer to the OP, I don't really mind whether more men join MN or not. But I do find it quite funny - the idea that it's a good job that there aren't more men hear to see the terrible things being said about men as a group

Somehow women manage to cope with national newspaper comments threads which mainly depict women as a load of incompetent, slutty, ugly bitches who spend their days alternating between hooking up with the next baby-daddy and going to the police with false-allegations of rape.

The worst things I have seen about "men" on here (as distinct from about one particular man) have been the kind of "chuh, men can't mop the floor properly" crap, which is usually swiftly jumped on.