to get really annoyed by the bullying tone on mumsnet?

[lollypoplady]

I haven't been on here long and tbh some of the I have read have made me feel really uncomforatble. It seems all someone has to do is ask a genuine question (not even make a 'judement') about a contentious topic e.g. stay at home mum's/working mums, chavvy names, or anything to do with benefits and they are jumped on and ranted at for being ignorant judgemental & ill informed among other things. I don't like it.

I got called an utter cow the other day I saw someone get called a cow bag. I was jealous. But, c'mon, some names are a little chavvy...

i'm not a bully. i'm just very cold, bored, overworked, underpaid, pedantic and all round brilliant. did i mention my toe still hurts too?

sometimes it gets a bit rough around here, but sometimes people get tons of really essential support.

I feel a bit of a bond with you because of your name, so I feel I should warn you that this type of post is likely to get quite a lot of "fuck off if you don't like it" sort of replies

i think it's got alot worse in the last 6 months or so, really sneery :( putting me off (which is probably good as i spent too much time on here anyway)

Absolutely chavvy, no point in denying it, but people seem to utterly freak out when they don't agree with someone elses personal opinion, the mind boggles!

There's a bit of lively debate on here - a lot of the name calling is tongue in cheek, and its quite sweary. A lot of people hide behind the anonymity and wouldn't be so harsh in real life, I don't think anyway.

But when you really need proper help and support - when your relationship has gone tits up, or you need help - its a great place.

Worth sticking around on, and hide the bits you don't like.

Yeah I have found lots of support here too lollipopshoes, it has been great for that!

lollypoplady there are quite a few threads that are started as a joke, but are taken seriously by some posters.

Best not to take anything too seriously

and don't post in AIBU unless you have your hard hat on

What you have described in your OP isn't "bullying".

i like it a lot
more of it i think
you IGNORANT person

amen

I quite like the bunfights

I think the fact that this site in anonymous and open means that people write all sorts that they would never say in normal conversation. Try to take everything with a handful of salt, and know that everyone is in same boat, in need of company, and it takes all sorts. There is lots of brilliant support, advice, humour etc on here too, don't let the bad bits get to you.

This site isn't flowery and 'lovely sweetie darling' like other sites. Real life isn't like this. People are blunt, they say it how it is as this is wht is often needed. There's nothing wrong with this, there's no 'huns' here. I'd rather someone was blunt and gave me practical advice that I could use rather then gave me sympathy.

I agree to an extent, I saw someone get called a c**t on a thread over the weekend, typed out a huge message along the lines of people have differing opinions, you are on a forum, no-one is being attacked blah blah blah then thought fuck it, it will fall on deaf ears and deleted it!!

I also agree that you get lots of support, I've been here for years left for a bit then came back recently. I just use it as a place to go for a giggle as there are hundreds of fantastically funny people on here that will no doubt bring a smile to your face.

As for the grumpy 'bullying' type threads, I read them then ignore them, much like a bad fart, you ignore it long enough it shall disappear :)

I would say it is actually

Oh come on, we're all big girls aren't we? People frequently ARE ill informed etc, what should we all do...hun them? I have been offended in the past by being told I was being an idiot and do you know what? I WAS being an idiot and it was character building.

What's a bunfight?

Personally, I find that if I join an internet community, and it's not exactly to my liking, or I find the posting norms a bit unfamiliar, the thing to do is to start a thread in a high traffic area insulting everyone in that community.

It really improves relations, and ensures that I can stay around without everyone thinking "oh ffs, that's that silly woman again" every time I try and post from there on in.

its cos there is lots of testostrone flying about on MN, because of all the hairy truckers like

In the past, I've sat on the fence on this one.
On the one hand it's the internet and AIBU is an area for honest opinion. However, I don't think that is an excuse for people being just plain rude.
I think enough people have posted about this recently that it is obviously a real issue which is worth discussing without the usual F-Off response. But don't hold your breath.

Honesty is always the best policy imo.

I do think that people may be a bit more honest "hiding" behind their computer screens than they might be in "real" life - face to face.

Tbh, I like to hear people's real opinions. Generally things tend to get most nasty in AIBU, but steer clear of that and it's all pretty harmonious!

I think YABU. If it's not your kind of place, there are plenty of others out there!

bunfight = heated exchange

fuck off then.

What tortoise said...

&

There are lots of internet forums, if you don't like this one, go and find another one you do like, instead of whinging or trying to change one the people here do like.

or in other words - bugger off to netmums.

I was lurking months before I posted as I was way too scared to dive in, and even then I think it was easy stuff like food / fashion.

Even now I only start an AIBU thread when I damn well know I'm not .

Just avoid the touchy subjects until you've got your bearings and know who the stroppy buggers are.