to think there should be a written code telling you what you do if you go for a smear?

[2shoes]

Have to book one so got me thinking how bloody awkward they are, no matter how many time s I have had it done, I still am never sure what to do.
I am told to go behind the screen and take my clothes off...........
so you take your jeans and pants of, then what, stand there or hop on bed?
so you hop on bed and try not to fall asleep, what do you do with your legs.....

oh and the fave mn question, do you take your socks off??

the list goes on

Maybe they meant big tall, y'know, in there.

We'd need big comfy chairs.

I love this thread. I have been laughing out loud. Luckily DH hasn't asked what I'm laughing at yet - he just keeps throwing funny little looks.

I had a nurse tell me once to unclothe my bottom half 'including your pants! My last lady left them on. I don't know what she was expecting. I'm good but not that good!'

I then suggested the lady might've worn crotchless ones specially We were laughing so much. Then she told me I'd have to stop laughing as I was nearly shooting the speculum out!

I have tears running down my face from laughing at this thread. No funny stories of my own I'm afraid, but thank you so much for cheering me up!

PMSL @ Sidge

This thread has really got me giggling.

On a slightly sensible note TPL, I find inserting the speculum myself averted the attempted escape up the table.

One memorable occasion, I was seen for my smear test by a drop-dead gorgeous, young doctor, which was a bit disconcerting. He had a fabulous bed-side manner, and - very thoughtfully - warmed the metal speculum in hot water before usage.

Not so thoughtful however as, when he had finished and I got off the bed/stood up, there was a sudden, warm gush.

I had to leave the cubicle with my knees as close together as I could sensibly manage and holding my pelvic floor as high as possible until I could reach the nearest toilet.

Brilliant ladies - thanks for several laugh out loud moments!

p.s. my smears have all be relatively uneventful