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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to not want to live in a house where someone has died?

152 replies

lola0109 · 22/10/2010 14:49

Ok, we live in a street that we love but our house is just too small and garden doesn't get the sun. That would be our reasons for ever moving. But the house across the road has an extra bedroom, extra living space (oh to have a playroom), a conservatory and a drive! We have a lovely old lady neighbour in this house, really lovely.

Anyway, DP and I always say that we want her house and DP (who has a sick sense of humour) always say well Mrs xxx won't be around forever so we could get her house. This will never happen, she has 9 kids and a gazillion grandkids and great grandkids.

But I've always sais the only way she'll leave that house is in a box. And I refuse to buy a house knowing someone has died in it. DP thinks this is ridiculous as it is possible someone died in our current house, but I don't know that.

Would you live in a house knowing someone had died in it?

Disclaimer: Both DP and I think Mrs xxx is fantastic and wish her a long and happy life!

OP posts:
Lulabel27 · 22/10/2010 16:44

not sure why strikeouts aren't working! test

Plopsie · 22/10/2010 16:44

It doesn't bother me in the slightest. DH and I sleep in the bed which my uncle died in (new mattress, obviously).

overmydeadbody · 22/10/2010 16:45

Yes of course.

What difference does it make?

pickledbabe · 22/10/2010 16:46

Lula, you still have to strike out every word.

scaleymcnamechange · 22/10/2010 16:46

My house is over 100 years old. Am sure someone must have died in it over the years. Mrs xxx might become ill and die in hospital or a home instead of the house. I have to say, this is a very odd thread!

didgeridoo · 22/10/2010 16:50

That rules out an awful lot of real estate, Lola. And you have to be careful with new builds - wasn't the new house in Poltergeist built on burial ground...........?[hgrin]

PrettyCandles · 22/10/2010 16:52

Way-hey, Pickled! Could it get any bett? I think not! That is not only the perfect, snug, character-filled, experienced-life house, it also appears to be a lace where chocolates are hand-made! Anyone who died in that house, lived happy and died happy. Grin

Wordsonascreen · 22/10/2010 16:52

My sister bought a house through probate where the bedroom had to be fumigated because of the flies.. the room was black

Depends if you're squeamish I suppose.

PrettyCandles · 22/10/2010 16:53

Typos! Huh! [eye-rolling emoticon]

emptyshell · 22/10/2010 16:54

Odds are any older house has had someone pop their clogs in it over the years. My mums is 250 years old so there's a fair chance, and as it's on the riverbank, people have jumped from the roadbridge up above very close to it on occasion too... on one such occasion my stepfather found the corpse, the police blocked the road along to investigate, leaving the pair of them sat on picnic tables outside the pub with my mum critiquing that "they don't do it that way on CSI."

I find it quite fascinating how houses have their own little life stories to be honest of who has lived there and how their lives have turned out - it wouldn't bother me at all.

MummyDoIt · 22/10/2010 17:02

I sleep in the same bed that DH died in (changed the sheets, obviously!). Doesn't bother me in the slightest but lots of visitors have declined my offer to give up my bed for them so clearly it's an issue for many people.

Lulumaam · 22/10/2010 17:03

I do live in a house where several people have died and we had a ghost too!

when the old geezer showed us round the house, he pointed out which room his dad died in ,where he'd scattered his mum's ashes on the roses, where his dog died..

we bought it ! the house is 100 years old, of course people have died in it

BuntyPenfold · 22/10/2010 17:11

lulumaam please tell more about your ghost.

FindingMymOOOOOOOOjo · 22/10/2010 17:15

The last house I lived in was built 1880's - chances are someone has died there. No biggie.

expatinscotland · 22/10/2010 17:15

It would depend on how they died.

If it's a murder or suicide, though, no, I would not live in it.

In some cases, too, even if it were a natural death.

I have lived in quite a few homes where people died or who died in what used to stand there before the home.

For the most part, if it it's a natural death, it's not troublesome.

But murders or suicides? Sorry, but no way.

We live over a place where the former occupant was murdered - although not there - and I can tell you now, I wouldn't live there and current occupant is having problems and spends little time there.

As far as, 'Well, how would you know?'

Trust me, I would.

marriednotdead · 22/10/2010 17:15

This thread has got me thinking. Am in Victorian conversion so probably had a few deaths (and births) in it.
You can't let that stop you living somewhere realistically.

Am more worried about the guy upstairs- he's an alcoholic loner (no sign of family or friends in over a decade) so if he eventually dies at home, we won't know until he's dripping through the ceiling long gone. I might want to move then!

DancingHippoOnAcid · 22/10/2010 17:19

Would not have a problem with living in a house where nice people had died peacefully.

Don't think I would mind living in a house with a friendly ghost either - but I know it would not be for everyone.

Might be a problem with living in a house where someone had died violently, due to "negative energy" etc but maybe I am being a bit silly about that.

Gory09 · 22/10/2010 17:20

""As long as they leave I don't care.""
That really made me laugh!Grin

FWIW Op, I feel a bit like you although I have unknowinglly probably lived in a few houses in which previous occupants had died.

expatinscotland · 22/10/2010 17:26

It all depends on the energy.

Last house we lived in, we designated the back bedroom as DD1's.

It is in the countryside and this bedroom faced an absolutely gorgeous, 1/2 acre garden full of native plants, flowers and trees, with national forest land in back of that.

There was a babbling burn to listen to.

But even the first night, DD1, almost from birth a star sleeper and your textbook angel baby and child, could not sleep in that room.

She'd wake screaming and then refused to be in there.

So I decided to spend the night there.

Well 'Elizabeth' passed away in there. Of natural causes, a chest ailment of some sort, either in 1886 or age 86. She was a crabbit old woman, at any rate.

Anyhow, the girls shared the middle bedroom.

My father could feel her, too, but he's got a sort of forcefield around him inherited straight off his mother and I don't think there's much around who'd dare to wake him up.

The house was rented, so I didn't feel right clearing her off, but I think I freaked the landlord's wife out.

She mentioned she'd seen motion outside the window there, so I matter-of-factly told her about Elizabeth.

pickledbabe · 22/10/2010 17:28

PrettyCandles - it's firefox, it won't just let me copy the url for the image. [hblush]

cory · 22/10/2010 17:30

That must let out an awful lot of houses, mrsoliver. Even our perfectly ordinary boring suburban semi is getting on for 100.

Lulumaam · 22/10/2010 17:30

bunty do a search for lulumama's haunted house.. there are 3 epic threads.. make a brew and settle in for the night Grin

expatinscotland · 22/10/2010 17:32

I did rent a room in a shared apartment where I knew a tenant had committed suicide in the bathroom.

I found out because I could smell her jasmine perfume whilst soaking in there one night and then saw her in the mirror.

Confronted the property manager, who backed down and confirmed it.

I didn't spend much time there, anyhow, as was mostly living with a boyfriend and then moved cities a few months later, but you can bet I never soaked in that bath again.

pickledbabe · 22/10/2010 17:34

oooh, expat. that's quite freaky...