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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To bloody well send them to a hotel?

350 replies

Tinalovestuna · 15/10/2010 21:42

In laws arrived 1/2 hour ago for planned weeks stay. Unbeknown to me or dh, fil has norovirus. He said he has been vomiting and has diarrhoea since 3am.

We have a 7 week old baby who has a cold.

I am so fucking livid at how stupid they are. Me and dh have just had a massive row in the bedroom because I think they should go and stay in a hotel, I don't want my baby infected.

Dh said I am being totally unfair as they have driven down to see the baby.

I said I would pay for a hotel.

Angry
OP posts:
saffy85 · 15/10/2010 22:12

If it is Norovirus.... I hope your DH and MIL both catch it. Serve them bloody right.

I don't often say things like that but they need to learn a harsh but valuable lesson: If you're leaking out both ends uncontrolably, the decent thing to do is minimise the risk of others suffering the same fate. By staying at home. Your own bloody home, not pitching up at someone elses. Angry

Your FIL has hopefully learnt this lesson and will never do something so fucking stupid ever again.

PotPourri · 15/10/2010 22:13

I'll be watching this thread. Tuna, please do let us know that you are ok over the next few days - I sooooo hope that you are.

As far as relationship with PIL - it'll never be the same again now. And that with your DH - that is going to need some work once this is all over - this will dent things. I am disgusted with the situation the lot of you have put you in....!

KickArseQueenOfTheDamned · 15/10/2010 22:13

Oh No! Shrimp! I've been there! dd2 was probably about a month old when me and dp got a D&V bug! Dp spent 4 days in bed while I had the same thing and had to look after dd1 &2 in the end I had to call my mum to stay with us she stayed away from us as much as poss disinfected everything and I only saw her when she brought dd2 in to be fed.

The memory of almost hurling dd2 into the cot to run to the bathroom and then crawling back on my hands and knees! Sad

OP your family are imbeciles. There is probably going to be a lot of kick over this in the coming weeks but you have done the right thing. Hope you are ok.

KickArseQueenOfTheDamned · 15/10/2010 22:14

Oh and I hate to say this but everything in your bathroom will be contaminated from when FIl flushed the loo.

Ditch it, manage without and buy more. Sorry :(

booooooooooyhoo · 15/10/2010 22:16

i only hope you have gotten out quick enough not to be infected.

jesus, it would serve them all right for MIL and your DH to get this too. maybe then they could understand why tehy should never have risked your DD getting it.

DeadPoncy · 15/10/2010 22:16

Is there any chance FIL was bundled into the car my MIL, without the willpower to fight, meaning that only one of them is this rude and selfish?

Hedgeblunder · 15/10/2010 22:17

Hopefully if your dh gets it he will thoroughly understand why you legged it!!!
My mum got that when my brother was 4 months and had to be hospitalised and we weren't allowed to visit even. We had to stay in a hotel for 3 weeks until my dad manage to disinfect everything whilst arranging childcare for us lot..

Oh and under NO circstance should you apologise for this. It is absolutley what is best for your baby.

DeadPoncy · 15/10/2010 22:22

by MIL.

Oops

IMoveTheStars · 15/10/2010 22:23

Yes... definitely ditch all your toothbrushes!! (or at least stick them in bleach)

expatinscotland · 15/10/2010 22:23

What a pair of utter wankers.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 15/10/2010 22:26

I don't think that a mumsnet thread has ever gobsmacked me more! They are total idiots, and should be paying to have your house deep cleaned, top to bottom before you set foot in it again.

Furthermore, I'd be telling them that they'd never be welcome in my home again.

Fingers crossed that you and the baby stay well, and that your mum spoils you rotten.

booooooooooyhoo · 15/10/2010 22:27

i actually feel sick with rage at the thought that someone would do that in your home.

mybabywakesupsinging · 15/10/2010 22:28

It is really much worse if a tiny baby gets bad D&V than an adult. And if the infection is novel to you, you won't be protecting baby by breastfeeding that much because you won't yet have antibodies yourself. So good decision to leave the house. If it is norovirus (is that prevalent in your area?) it will be very very easy to transmit within a household.
48 hours minimum from last vomit or diarrhoea, before you have any contact with your PIL or DH. Bleach everywhere and wash hands with soap.
Hope you and lo stay well.

ratspeaker · 15/10/2010 22:29

I cant believe anyone with D and V would get in a car then travel to someone elses house, let alone where there is a new baby!

Why didn't he stay at home where he'd be more comfortable?

Why did they not postpone the visit?

I doubt any hotel would take them, if its norovirus it could spread throught the hotel and get them closed down for a deep clean

Best wishes I hope you and the wee one escape the squitters

booooooooooyhoo · 15/10/2010 22:35

i know ratspeaker. why would you want to leave your own home when you are that sick? if it was me i would be in bed, i would not be traipsing round the country, never mind to a house with a newborn.

pooka · 15/10/2010 22:36

How do they know is norovirus?

Terrible behaviour, but soft hearted me thinks maybe FIL not that bad until was at yours and now is unable to move (can appreciate that because D&V is debilitating).

Or maybe he thought was food related and woudln't be catching?

Understand that maybe I'm being way too kind. But I can kind of understand how he can't move now in the throes of D&V. They should be grovelling and mortified with shame though.

ApocalypseCheese · 15/10/2010 22:36

Ah yes, memories of breastfeeding whilst vomiting into a bucket at the same time.

Also hoovering with vomit bucket, mopping floor with vomit bucket, washing dishes with vomit bucket. etc

Selfish twats.

pooka · 15/10/2010 22:38

By not that bad, maybe he felt a bit queasy and dodgy tummied in the early hours but wrote it off as food-related, only to realise the full aching horror when they arrived at your house.

expatinscotland · 15/10/2010 22:38

It doesn't matter what the D&V is from. If you have D&V, you don't travel. Because it's dangerous for other people.

That's just pure and simple decency and courtesy.

BubbleBobble · 15/10/2010 22:39

I am aghast at this. There are no words for how dangerously idiotic and irresponsible they are.

pooka · 15/10/2010 22:39

And of course I think it is pretty stupid to go visiting if you think you have any dodgy ailment. But maybe they just didn't think.

expatinscotland · 15/10/2010 22:39

OP said FIL admitted to have D&V since 3AM this morning.

MoralDefective · 15/10/2010 22:39

DH just said this POOKA...how DO they know?

bigchris · 15/10/2010 22:41

You can understand why mil didn't want to leave the house right away though can't you? Turfing out really ill fil wasn't going to happen once he'd arrived and no hotel would take him I'm sure

pooka · 15/10/2010 22:41

I know expat - I was wondering whether he thought was norovirus then, or food-related d&v (which need not be catching).

I know, I know, am being far too kind probably, but I suppose I am projecting - know that my in-laws/family members would be much more careful and considerate and so can almost not believe that anyone would a) deliberately set off for a weekend away knowing that would be throwing up and feeling like death or b) do so when there's a newborn in the house.

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