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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to find this comment about C sections annoying

141 replies

whoneedssleepanyway · 06/10/2010 17:43

my friend and his wife are expecting their first baby which they conceived naturally after a number of IVF attempts.

he told me the other day that she will probably have a C section as her uterus is an unusual shape and they are seeing the consultant in a few weeks who will decide if she can have one.

he then said, she will be pretty gutted if she can't have a C section as everything with the pregnancy has gone smoothly to this point and it will just be better to have a C section....

it is none of my business and up to them but i found this assumption that a C section was somehow better and safer a bit naive.....

AIBU?

OP posts:

ariane5 · 07/10/2010 17:22

i think a lot of the problem stems partly from overuse of the term 'too posh to push' and the (wrong) assumption that c/s is somehow a failure and that vb is always best.

i personally think it is a valid choice and no better or worse than vb just a different way of delivering.

i tried vb with my first and ended up having emcs because dd was too big to deliver vaginally and got distressed. had i known that beforehand id have chosen to have an elective.

Original poster

whoneedssleepanyway · 07/10/2010 19:48

i know what he has told me though about why they have decided that etc, hence my opinion (e.g. he said he had been surprised to find out you weren't recommended to drive for 6 weeks after which is something I would expect you would know if you had done a lot of research)....at the end of the day if you had to know every in and out of everything no-one would ever be able to have an opinion on anything...

there are people with good and bad experiences of both forms of delivery and I definitely agree that CS is often better but i just sometimes think people don't think of it as major abdominal surgery which it is.

anyway think i have had enough flaming for one day so won't say any more on the matter

OP posts:

withorwithoutyou · 07/10/2010 19:52

Ok, but just so you know, I've had a c-section and wasn't recommended not to drive for 6 weeks. I was told I could drive when I felt ready and able to do an emergency stop, which was 3.5 weeks

Chynah · 07/10/2010 20:04

I was never advised not to drive for 6 weeks either in fact my midwife was encouraging me to drive after 10 days first time and second time I drove at 8 days (insurance companies didn't care).

Original poster

whoneedssleepanyway · 07/10/2010 20:08

withorwithoutyou i can see you won't let this drop that i can't have an opinion, he was the one who told me about the six week thing sorry if i have got that wrong...anyway i back down you are right IABU and shouldn't have an opinion

OP posts:

withorwithoutyou · 07/10/2010 20:12

Of course you can have an opinion, it's just a shame if it's not based on fact.

I've been on the receiving end of (in your words) judgey opinions about c-sections. It's really unpleasant. Well done for asking and accepting YABU though, most people don't bother.

Olifin · 07/10/2010 20:16

I have met quite a lot of women who didn't realise that having a C-section might affect their chances of getting BFing off to a good start. For most of these women, their C-sections were emergencies anyway so it's a moot point but I suppose it might be something else to consider for those women who are choosing a CS.

Taking into account, of course, that not all women want to BF anyway.

MissBeehiving · 07/10/2010 20:30

Where does that six weeks thing come from? My insurers didn't care at all.

Shelly32 · 07/10/2010 20:32

Mosschops, i had my cs. was up and about as soon as the anaesthetic wore off and driving 1 week later. No problems. Babies were out and safe in the matter of minutes. I have a friend who insisted on natural. Her baby has brain damage through lack of oxygen. It is major surgery but if it's best for baby and it was in my and many other cases, then in my book it's best. Yes the scar hurts for a bit but no more than my vagina would have had i pushed two large heads out of it! You keep pushing your argument and trying to take the choice out of child birth.If someone doesn't want to endanger their baby (like in some cases) and doesn't relish the thought of hours of pain, if we have the technology and medical know how, why not??

Lovethesea · 07/10/2010 21:01

Olifin - I think it is a traumatic birth that makes BF harder - whether vb or emcs - not a c-section of itself.

albertcamus · 07/10/2010 21:03

Anenome Well....birth bloody hurts...a lot...bollix to the natural shit. Slash me open and pop them out any day....I have had 2 sections...one emergency and one planned...first one was after 40 hour failed labour....never again thanks.

I'll be showing your comment to my precious twin DDs aged 22 this weekend just to reinforce the msg that I'm not the only person in the world who suffered an incompetently managed first labour resulting in a distressed nine-pounder having to be cut out. They are already decided that they will be 'too posh to push' and I have no faith in the NHS not to force them towards natural births largely to save money, not worrying about the consequences for people such as Riven who are the ones who suffer the results of the combination of incompetence and penny-pinching. I know I'm paranoid, but I haven't forgotten how awful it was with my son 24 years ago, and can't stand the thought of them going through it. It wasn't so much the pain & worry about the baby as the total incompetence of the 'medical professionals' that struck fear into me :(

Olifin · 07/10/2010 21:33

I agree with that Lovethesea but I thought there was also some suggestion that those having an elective section (therefore less traumatic than an emcs) could also experience difficulties. Something to do with the fact that the body has not gone into labour and therefore certain hormonal processes are missed. Sound very vague, I know but I know I have read about it. Will have a look for it another day. Supposed to be working at the mo :(

duchesse · 07/10/2010 21:46

Sheely- Mosschops did have an appallingly bad experience of CS. She is just putting forward her very valid point of view. What I think she is saying (sorry for paraphrasing you Mosschops) that it is indeed not necessarily a straightforward and trouble-free procedure and that when things go wrong with a CS, they can go just as spectacularly wrong and much worse as a vaginal birth. On the whole, VB are subject to far fewer major complications than CS.

If your CSections are trouble-free then you are lucky. Many women have a lot of problems after one. I was lucky not to despite the circumstances of my daughter's birth, but most of the other women I know who have one have had at the very least some scar infection and required ABs, which on a deep abdominal wound made in a hospital where AB resistant bacteria dwell, -ie most of them- could cause far worse complications that a straightforward vaginal birth.

duchesse · 07/10/2010 21:47

Shelly- Mosschops did have an appallingly bad experience of CS. She is just putting forward her very valid point of view. What I think she is saying (sorry for paraphrasing you Mosschops) that it is indeed not necessarily a straightforward and trouble-free procedure and that when things go wrong with a CS, they can go just as spectacularly wrong and much worse as a vaginal birth. On the whole, VB are subject to far fewer major complications than CS.

duchesse · 07/10/2010 21:48

soz, dunno how that happened.

withorwithoutyou · 07/10/2010 21:52

Olifin - it's the removal of the placenta that precipitates the hormonal change which starts milk production.

Traumtatic births and c-sections can create physical or psychological barriers to breastfeeding - e.g. issues with picking up baby but there are no other hormonal changes necessary to start breastfeeding off - that is another one of the c-section myths that are bandied about to add fuel to the fire that women shouldn't opt to have them.

I believe NICE recently issued advice stating categorically that women shouldn't be advised that there is a hormonal component missing from a c-section birth which would be necessary for successful breastfeeding. Can't remmember where I read that though but pretty sure it's the case.

duchesse · 07/10/2010 22:04

Can assure everyone reading that there was absolutely not a jot of difference milk-wise between my 3 natural births and the CS. Was lactating like Daisy and Minerva by day 3, but baby too sick to eat much so I pumped and stored. She took 5-6 days to begin to feed properly.

Chynah · 07/10/2010 22:05

No problems feeding either of my two after my ELCSs - they went straight on in the recovery room.

otchayaniye · 08/10/2010 07:31

No problems here, still breastfeeding at 23 months. Milk came in the next day.

It's a myth.

ariane5 · 08/10/2010 08:13

i had no trouble bf my 3 after c/s, withdd1 it took couple of days of perseverance but nothing major and ds and dd2 were absolutely fine.

NestaFiesta · 08/10/2010 09:01

Was breastfeeding 35 minutes after a EMCS. Would have done it sooner but I was being stitched up! No probs with post CS breast milk production on either of my CSs. Glad NICE have updated their website to reflect this.

Shelly32 · 08/10/2010 09:28

Mosschops may have a valid point Duchess and i'm sorry for her bad experience but no need to call my opinion ignorant. I don't think that's a particularly good way to communicate.Thta's like me calling her ignorant just because i had a positive experience.

Mingg · 08/10/2010 09:40

"when things go wrong with a CS, they can go just as spectacularly wrong and much worse as a vaginal birth" what could be worse than the mother, baby or neither surviving the birth - can happen with VB too. Both have risks and things can go wrong but I really can't see how the possible worse end result is any better with VB.

duchesse · 08/10/2010 10:14

Shelly, erm, eh? Could you point me to the part in what I posted where I called you ignorant??

Shelly32 · 08/10/2010 10:17

Sorry, not u, Mosschops called my opinion ignorant. Looking back, my syntax is a little ambiguous.

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