Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

to have no idea what to do with my baby

109 replies

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 09:56

...
when she's awake?

OP posts:

LadyintheRadiator · 26/09/2010 09:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 09:58

11 weeks

OP posts:

Lulumaam · 26/09/2010 10:00

just hold her, talk to her sing to her, lay her on a mat to kick her legs , take her for a walk in the pram/sling?

ben5 · 26/09/2010 10:01

i used to sing to mine! poor ds's!
aslo take them out for walks and just chat to them. show them trees, birds etc.
read simple kids books to them. the cloth ones they can hold and suck are great. show them the colours, talk about the pictures.
take them to toddler groups. everyone loves to hold a baby and you get to talk to an adult and have a coffee.
the libary often have rhyme times.
take them swimming, does your local pool have lessons for little ones?
baby massage

Original poster

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 10:01

doing all that

but i don't have time to do anything else at all

(honestly... I find it boring)

OP posts:

ItWasADarkAndStormyNight · 26/09/2010 10:02

Ds is 6mo and I still struggle, I just sit him up, if we're out and about he loves looking at faces. Hearing people chatting, sometimes I play him a baby laughing on youtube he loves that!
Sing to them, read, ds likes me wriggling his legs on the floor, though his favourite thing in the world is pretending to walk.
I think any interaction is good really.

Aitch · 26/09/2010 10:03

it IS boring when they are that age. get a sling, keep yakking and pointing out stuff and kissing the top of her head and try to have a life for yourself and make pals with other mums before she gets mobile and the thought of a coffee in a civilised environment becomes a dream.

shimmerysilverglitter · 26/09/2010 10:03

I don't think I found it boring so much as the sheer hard graft of it got me down a bit. All worth it though when you do something new with them like swimming or show them something and they smile, tides you over through the hard work till the next time.

ItWasADarkAndStormyNight · 26/09/2010 10:04

What did you have in mind then? Babies love interaction, are you missing talking to adults? I miss talking to adults.

shimmerysilverglitter · 26/09/2010 10:05

Yes stick her in a sling and carry on as usual, sling's essential for new babies. Told my SIL this (just had her first) but she won't get one as she is scared baby will fall out . Anyhooo, get a sling.

Animation · 26/09/2010 10:05

I was important for me to pull a couple of new 'mum' friends from off the street.

mummynoseynora · 26/09/2010 10:07

I struggled with DD from about 6-12 weeks.... after that she quite liked having a kick about under her gym thing.... if you have a carrier or sling take her for a walk to the shops - or in the buggy to somewhere?

At that age, just looking at new things is good - so even if you want to go to town shopping you could just put her in carrier / sling / buggy and carry on!

DesperateHousewife21 · 26/09/2010 10:13

Yeah my ds is 11 weeks and I talk to him, lay him down and play music to him, shake rattles at him.
Trouble is though his attention span is about 10mins and then he's moaning so its back to feeding/rocking to sleep etc.

Currently bouncing his chair trying to get him to sleep, I know he's tired but he's so stubborn he will rarely sleep in the day.
Would take him out but the weather is rubbish and Im so tired from all the broken nights.

I just wish he was the age where he can sit up and actually grab and hold things and do a few more things for himself.

Aitch · 26/09/2010 10:16

everything gets MUUUCH better at 16 weeks, as i recall. i hope all you tired ladies have nice stretchy slings.

pommedeterre · 26/09/2010 10:16

Yes, mother and baby groups and going out for lunch en masse after (if budget affords). Baby groups kept me sane from about 3 weeks old onwards.

Original poster

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 10:17

i do have a sling but find im so knackered i cant go far. i find i go out for a walk for no reason... not because i want to

have a few new mum friend but im bored of constant baby talk. i miss my non baby friends

OP posts:

ScroobiousPip · 26/09/2010 10:19

Hi, Imissredwine, I noticed you other thread about moving to FF because you are not enjoying bfing, which is completely fine. I only mention it because on both threads you sound a little bit down. Have you considered whether you might have PND? It might be worth going for a check up with the GP.

If that's definitely ruled out then another vote here for a sling - chuck DD in and head on out for coffee/walks/shopping or whatever else you keeps you interested. 11 week olds really don't need much stimulation as long as they are close to you and are fed and changed regularly so it's a great time to indulge a few of your own interests.

DesperateHousewife21 · 26/09/2010 10:19

I go to a different baby group every day they literally keep me sane.

Aitch · 26/09/2010 10:20

you need new mum friends. what's stopping you from seeing your old friends, exactly?

Stangirl · 26/09/2010 10:23

Joining the chorus of support for baby groups. I also joined every free course at the children centres and bunged my baby into their creche - she was socialized/entertained and I learned all sorts of things/drank tea. Currently I'm doing a 3 month sewing course and my 7month old goes to the creche. I also invested in lots of flashing/moving/noisy toys to spin around her/her to play with as she is now older. I wouldn't really worry about entertaining yours - she'll be happy just watching you and whatever you are up to.

Original poster

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 10:24

thanks for your interest scrooby

i do have pnd, only a recent admission to myself... have seen various people to start help.

im just finding it all so overwhelming at the moment... husband back to work 2moro... he took unpaid leave as i was having trouble adjusting... hes on nights and the thoghut of day and night duty with baby is a bit frightening

OP posts:

backwardpossom · 26/09/2010 10:25

I used to take DS to the supermarket and hope I'd bump into someone I knew!! If I didn't, I'd just go to the cafe and have a cup of tea while he either slept (in buggy or sling) or BFed. It's really hard at that age, but I don't think you necessarily need to 'do' anything - the world around them is fascinating enough for them. Take care x

missjackson · 26/09/2010 10:25

Yes, organise a coffee or lunch or evening out with the old friends. They are probably missing you too! Take your baby along in a sling or buggy, and meet them during their lunch break - bet they'll be really pleased to see you and get some cuddles with your little one. And have a glass of red wine if you miss it! Don't worry, this bit will pass soon and you do get a bit of balance back - it just takes time.

Original poster

imissredwine · 26/09/2010 10:27

hard to see non baby friends with baby needing constant attention. they are all interested in her until she cries then its straight back to me... feel bad about dragging her out in evenings to see them

OP posts:

Animation · 26/09/2010 10:28

imissredwine - I found it overwhelming too - there's a lot of adjusting and self sacrifices to make.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5