Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to go and stick up for my little sister?

154 replies

thebrightside · 25/09/2010 20:45

My younger sister, (just turned 18) babysits for a family with 3 kids aged 3, 6 and 9. She's been doing this for 2 years. Middle boy has epilepsy, can have fits during the night, but it is rare.

AShe charges £5 an hour, pretty reasonable! It's all unofficial, no contract/agencies involved.

They're a bit tight about money,although being pretty well off, but are generally quite a nice family who relied on and trusted my sister a lot.

Anyway, she sat for them last night. Expected them to be back at about midnight but was left till 4.30am. Rung them 3 times, each time they said they were on their way.

She fell asleep on the sofa at about 3.30 she reckons. She's never done this before and was cross at herself for it, but bloody hell anyone would struggle to stay awake at that time. They arrived home and found her asleep.

The Dad had had a few and shouted at her calling her 'negligent, useless etc,' and refused to pay her for the whole night, (nearly 10 hours - so should have been £50)

She's mortified, it's completely knocked her confidence. I'm furious at them.

I understand, especially with having an epileptic child, you want the sitter to be alert and responsible. BUT parents were 4 and a 1/2 hours late. They know she wasn't asleep for long as she had rung them at 1.30, 2.30 and 3 am. They sleep through the night when they're at home.

So are there any reasons that I shouldn't go round and demand her money back? £50 is a lot for an 18 year old.

OP posts:
taintedpaint · 26/09/2010 12:24

sorry, typo, ore more!

PlumBumMum · 26/09/2010 12:48

Or Littlemiss she could agree to babysit again,
and not show up, then when they ring to see where she is she could just keep telling them she's on her way

But it is out of order and I would go round there

CloudsAway · 26/09/2010 12:51

Did she ring them on her mobile, which might be useful so she has a record of when she called them?

It's outrageous that they'd treat her like this. I agree that a babysitter being paid should usually be expected to stay awake unless it's been agreed that she's staying overnight, but if they have come back that much later than agreed, then normal rules no longer apply.

Animation · 26/09/2010 12:56

CloudsAway - I don't agree that staying awake after 12 midnight should be expected of any babysitter.

Silver1 · 26/09/2010 12:56

Actually being asleep and sober is far better for a child with epilepsy, than a parent who is drunk and irrational-which TBH it sounds like he/they were.

I would go and see them, with or without your sister, if they don't pay up then yes, the next time she agrees to babysit she should let them down BADLY!

motherinferior · 26/09/2010 13:10

Get the money and spread the word. Get it round the teenage-babysitting grapevine that they do this. They'll have REAL problems finding anyone to babysit again Grin.

I came back on Thursday evening after being out from 5.30 till just before 10 and gave my teenage babysitter an extra fiver for coping with a small girl who'd woken up crying with a temperature. (AND he'd had three helpings of the rather nice supper I'd left them all Grin.) FFS, I can never get over being able to get a babysitter at all.

bumpsoon · 26/09/2010 13:16

I would have gone round there at 8am ,shouted very very loudly ,demanded the money and then said whilst pointedly looking at the wife ' oh and dont worry ,she says she wont mention the other little incident involving your husband to anyone else ' ,turn on heels and leave . But then im a class a bitch to anyone who treats any memeber of my family or friends in such a downright disgusting and disrespect manner

bumpsoon · 26/09/2010 13:17

sorry for typos ,keyboard still recover ing from coffee input

grapeandlemon · 26/09/2010 13:19

I just second everything that has been said. I am horrified at what happened to her and it sound suspiciously like they tried to get out of extra pay. The poor poor girl. She is still quite young and it would take wild horses to stop me from confronting them if it were my little sis. Please show her this thread.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 26/09/2010 13:20

Brightside let us know how you get on I think your sister has been treated appallingly.

thumbwitch · 26/09/2010 13:25

what utterly repulsive people.
I hope your sister has nothing else to do with them but think you should indeed go round there (with her) to claim her dues. And tell them exactly what you think of supposedly grown up people who bully 18yos.

giveitago · 26/09/2010 13:33

How awful for her. I assume she's not going to babysit for them any longer so yep, in your shoes, I'd go around there and demand the money owed to your sister - PLUS an apology.

They a) didn't come back on time and b) expected her to be up all night on their whim.

Not nice.

Hope your sister is OK.

MilkNoSugarPlease · 26/09/2010 13:54

Fuck Me Thats awful!

Can't believe that!

Yes ok if your babysitting then you are expected to stay awake but 4AM is outrageous!

I've babysat for a woman like that in the past (no more! never again!) her DCs didnt have any health problems but she would regularly come back 3 hours late, not pay me for a week, expect me to be at her beck and call, never have her phone on

Last straw was when She begged me to babysit, I said fine but only until 11pm at the latest as I have an exam tomorrow, yep no problem, she came in at 3.45am and wanted to pay me less per hour for the hours theyd been asleep Hmm....never babysat for them again and cant believe i let them do it so many times!

She absolutely cannot let this family do that to her!

I want to give her the £50 so she doesnt have to babysit for them again!!!!!!

go give them hell bright side!

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 26/09/2010 14:02

I hope you do go round, op.

Even the toughest of us find it hard to confront people when they've been intimidated this way.

thebrightside · 26/09/2010 14:04

We're going round shortly.
Will let you know how it went when I return. Thanks all

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 26/09/2010 14:05

good luck

diddl · 26/09/2010 14:15

Hope it all goes OK.

dinkystinky · 26/09/2010 14:28

Good luck Brightside - I am shocked at those parents. How dare they fuck off till 4.30 am in the morning, without prior warning to the sitter, then come back expecting her to be wide awake and even worse, expecting to pay her a pittance! I hope they're feeling very ashamed of themselves today and that they pay her what she's due (and then some!) and apologise. And that she never has to work for them again!

nancydrewrocked · 26/09/2010 14:32

Good luck.

You should print off this thread so that if they are complete twats and refuse to pay up she can just hand it to him as she leaves.

Reading so many people calling you repulsive/twat/dickhead/irrational/rude etc etc would make even the twatiest of twats feel a little shamefaced.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 26/09/2010 14:43

I hope the mother is on MN Grin

PlumBumMum · 26/09/2010 14:45

Good luck

misdee · 26/09/2010 14:45

good luck!

i wish i could find a good babysitter i could trust.

DaisySteiner · 26/09/2010 14:47

Must have been really frightening too, being woken up and shouted at.

Hope they realise how unreasonable they've been.

agedknees · 26/09/2010 14:50

Couldn't ignore this thread. The man sounds like a complete dickhead. Shouting at a 18 year old for falling asleep at 3.30am.

Hope you get the money for your dsis. You sound like a lovely older sister.

HecateQueenOfWitches · 26/09/2010 14:55

hope it all went ok.