to think that it's the people with the most help with their kids seem to be the ones who struggle the most with them

[peterpiperpicked]

Ok,

Firstly, yes, you're all going to flame me. Yes, round of applause to me for managing two kids on my own with absolutely no family help or childcare, blah de blah de blah.

But, I'm just wondering if anyone else has noticed that the people who seem to really struggle with bringing up small children (I mean babies and pre-schoolers) and moan about it loads and just give off a general air of not coping without tons of help are the people who have people to help them all the time?

I know loads of people with their Mum plus extended family round the corner to help out all the time and they are the self-same people who would also have a nervous breakdown at the thought of popping along to Sainsburys with a couple of kids in tow.

Then there are the rest of us who just get on with it and know that it's really not so bad and you don't need your hand holding through all of it.

So, yes flame away, I have namechanged for the occsaion. Even drop in a few platitudes about how I sound charming and it takes a village to raise a child. But seriously, aren't some people a bit crap to not be able to bring their own children up?

I dont give a shit who you are.

But to an extent you are right.
Some people just dont cope. And for that reason they get help. They still might not cope, but they cope better than without ANY help.

NickOfTime - I pull more than my fair share, thanks. I work 10 hours a day and bathe our daughter, cook the evening meal and put her to bed.

You still all prefer to tear lumps out of one another, for some strange reason.

Nope, still don't recognise the OP.

I sort of see what you mean. But then again, I guess it seems that there might be a lot of circumstances you don't know about. Plus sometimes people just are a bit less sturdy than other people. I can't see the point in moaning about it. Take Reality's SIL, for example- she appears to get loads of help, but is clearly rather unhappy. What is to be gained from getting all aerated about it?

To each what they need, from each what they can give.

Have you ever wondered that the people you speak of might never have moved very far away or done much on their own because they are just not capable of being independent. Actually, they are probably really clever because rather than pulling their own fingers out they manipulate everyone else to do it for them. Perhaps they just have the last laugh and it's the rest of us who are stupid for doing it all and trying hard.

'lame'

'beyond lame'

This is the sort of language 14-year-old boys use, isn't it?

Would you be happier if all struggling parents stayed inside with their children getting no help, so you don't have to watch them 'seeming' to struggle? That would be so much better, wouldn't it?

Yes, people moan and some of them have more help. Its not necessarily a child/parenting thing.

I had a friend who moaned constantly about her job, said she couldn't do the job she did without having a boyfriend to support her (I was single at the time). Mmm, how do other grown women cope?

Another friend, single, childless whose parents are at her beck and call and she's 42 FFS. She moans all the time too. Its just the way some people are.

Yes I agree cerealqueen.

I can't believe it that the OP actually had a go at someone for crying in the office! Jesus, someone betrayed a bit of vulnerability! Heaven forfend! Let's just all be hard-nosed bitches who cope, shall we?

So you cope. So fucking what?! Methinks the lady doth protest too much..

And for the record, I cope just fine thanks. But won't be bleating on about it for your benefit.

Crying in the office? What are you, 5? Why would you cry in an office?

Hilariously I am considered to be a 'coper' despite all my office blubbing

barmy, are you married to me? (ah, no. you only work ten hours a day and you don't make b'fast and packed lunches)

tis a puzzle, for sure. i think it's exacerbated when folk post deliberately provocative threads, though, eh? almost looking to start a good bunfight...

Um ... peter ... 5 year olds don't go to offices?

Crying is, contrary to popular mythology, not in fact the visible sign of power draining out of your eyes. It really is just slightly salty water.

Yes - I'm 5 - I should be in bed

Night then pixie.

NickOfTime - "you don't make b'fast and packed lunches"

How do you know that?

Are you presuming that if I have neglected to mention something then I don't do it?

"Crying is, contrary to popular mythology, not in fact the visible sign of power draining out of your eyes. It really is just slightly salty water."

Nope, it's just a sign of someone who can't control their emotions for long enough to excuse themselves and get out of the room.

No different to people at work who lose their temper and shout a lot because they just can't help themesleves.

nah - just thinking if you were my dh, you would have mentioned it...

It's a bit feminine though, isn't it? To cry in an office?

I mean, we should be grateful that the men have allowed us to work, we shouldn't expect to be able to stop pretending that we're men.

Of course colditz, because men don't cry

Actually, plenty of women don't boo-hoo over every little thing, doesn't stop us being women. But thanks for the gender stereotyping.

Indeed, colditz. Femininity is very catching, I understand, we must keep it in check.

lol at this debacle

peterpiperpickedthewrongfuckingforumtodisgorgehishalfbakedunreconstructedpigignorantbullshit

Oh fgs LRD please don't drag all women down to your level.