AIBU to think the reason some NHS trusts dont let you know the sex...

[SloanyPony]

...is nothing to do with that old chestnut that "some cultures will act on the information" (i.e have a termination if its the "wrong" sex)

And that this explanation was something designed by someone not very nice to incite racial hatred, or at best a cultural generalisation gone wrong that has somehow become "fact".

Regardless of culture/religion, surely if a person has a preference for a baby of a particular sex, they would find out earlier - or in any event, would pay privately? Seriously if its that important to you that you would terminate a pregnancy over it, surely you can find £70 for a gender scan?

Does anyone actually know? Anyone worked for a hospital and seen it in writing in a policy? Anyone got anything concrete other than anecdotal whispers that this is the reason?

Because it seems more likely to me that the reson some trusts do not tell is because they dont have time to prat about if the baby is in the wrong position, trying to find a willy or lack of one. Its an anomaly scan, nothing else, and that's what you get.

There must be someone on Mumsnet who has a really good retort for people who spout this as the reason they are not "allowed" to find out the sex - "its all their fault" bollix. Help me out, as I'm sick of hearing it. (Unless I am really wrong, I stand corrected if so)

And if I'm wrong and that is actually the reason, feel free to tell me AIBU but preferably give me more than some anecdotal evidence.

I'm not starting this thread to cause a ruck by the way, this is something that's always made my teeth itch but I've never had anything "official" enough to put a stop to the notion and I'd like to.

Thanks.

My dh is a clin neg lawyer, I will check wih him but am 99% sure you would not be able to sue for this.

When I was having DS1 the hospital refused to tell us the sex stating it was because a large number of Asian baby girls get aborted

I was told with DS2 as it was a different hospital in a much less racially mixed area.
Stupid thing is you can go to babybond and find out anyway

I had a scan at 34 weeks as I was measuring small - not my idea and I was under consultant care anyway so I was literally ushered out of the consultant room into a scan, so definitely not trying anything on, I was terrified something was wrong with the baby.

Once they had said everything was OK, I did ask them if they could double check the sex while they were there. Just because I was curious. So I suppose if the scanner hadn't realised that I had been referred by a consultant she would quite possibly though "oh god another time waster". So some people might be getting unfairly judged there.

I have never heard the reasons in OP's post but in our hospital they say 'if i were to take an educated guess i would say boy/girl'

This is after a couple (of idiots) were told probably a girl and decorated a nursery in pink and had 'Stephanie' stenciled into just about everything and then had a boy.

They said DS was a girl at the 20 week scan and then the next 4 scans he had his legs shut, then at 37 weeks they said boy..

I wasn't bothered at all i just rung up dp and said 'your daughter appears to have grown something she shouldn't have!'

Sorry i will just add the couple in my last post tried to sue for the emotional turmoil they had been put through due to the hospitals 'mistake'...

We weren't allowed to know the sex of DS2 because they said there was a 5% error rate and they can get it wrong. I don't think they were worried so much about being sued but the potential 200 or so sets of parents who didn't get what they were expecting. It can be quite traumatising I would have thought. That is the way it was told to us.

Nothing to do with the cultural thing afaik, although they would probably assume that it wouldn't apply to us, if the stereotypes and prejudices are the real reason, as we are white British.

Didn't bother me as we didn't want to know anyway.

My Nhs trust don't disclose the sex. I knew this when I had dc2. So, before the scan I researched the differences and looked for myself. Got it right as well! I wonder who id have sued if I was wrong!.....

When I was expecting DD ten years ago there was a sign up stating that they would only tell the mother the sex, but only if she asked.

We have to find out. Some boys in OH's family have been worn without an opening in their foreskin, it can't be picked up on a scan but if it's a boy they can keep an eye out for indications that it might be a problem (such as too much water) and the baby may have to be sent for treatment after birth.

I've always said I was having a girl and always been right. Last time my eldest said she was having a "sista". We told the MW who did the echo (another family history problem!) what she'd said and when she'd finished the scan we asked if she'd been able to see and she said "Oh, I thought you knew" then went back over and said "looks like DD1 is right."