Perfectly reasonable things which you unreasonably unreasonable about

[GetOrfMoiLand]

Names with umlauts in them, unless you live in Germany or nordic lands. I don't mind accents in names, or that funny dot above the i in Irish names, but names with umlauts in get on my tits. Especially Zoë. Everyone can pronounce it when it is spelled Zoe. It is just attention seeking.

The noise some people make when swallowing, especially liquid. Urghhh.

Milk in tea, gag. Have it by all means but please don't breath it over me.

People who tell not very amusing anecdotes who then laugh loudly at the end.
Guilting you into laughing.

Voicemail and answerphones. Hate them. I usually don't want to talk to people and if they leave a message I feel obliged to. I won't let DP get one at home.

Also, Richard Bacon. What is the point?

Or when you are out/busy/not answering door, the person then calls and says in accusatory voice " Dont you answer your door then?'

Not if I am not in I don't, no. And even if i am, I might not want to see you, so why dont you take the hint like a normal person instead of dragging out a lie we both wont believe?

two tone hair styles (you know blonde at the front, brown at the back)

perfumedlife so with you on the anecdotes thing...painful

Ditto (and this is dhs speciality) telling too long stories about everyday events. You don't need to tell me every line in that phone conversation with every nuance of voice just give me a SUMMARY.

ill fitting bras

Am with you there Vinegartits

bad teeth (no excuse for bad teeth, get the dentist)

Perfumed - I am the same.

I don't answer the door generally. I have been in teh kitchen before, someone knocks on the door (think it is some NPower man), I smile, he thinks I am answering teh door to him, just walk right past the door into the sitting room and shut the door.

I don't answer the landline either, ever. If someone complaisn I just say I never answer it, if you want to get hold of me text or call mobile.

ooh, and pants that wriggle and trousers that won't stay up.

M People (cant stand that group, Heather's voice makes me want to stab myself in the head with blunt objects)

im on a role...

I don't answer the landline either getorf wish my parents would catch on to this fact

Oh yes Minxof, I get what the subject had for dinner, the night before the meeting, or was it after? Anyhoo (arrhh, hate anyhoo) it was the day i was wearing my brown coat, remember, you got it out the dry cleaners'

Just get to the fucking point, the life blood is ebbing away from me.

Ricky Gervais. Yes I know he is supposed to some kind of comedic messiah, but i think he is repugnant and vile.

I used to think he was funny - loved the Office. But then I watched some 'making of' the office, and heard Ricky Gervais laugh for the first time. Then I realised he is actually JUST LIKE David Brent, in real life. Been repulsed by him ever since.

skinny people saying i look so fat today

speaking of repugnant and vile. woody allen. bleugh...

Oh, men with curly hair. Especially those with posh accents a la Sebastian Faulks or Valentine Warner

Ew Ew Ew

Ahhh, feel much better now. Blood pressure restored to normal, off to do some light housework.

Thanks for that girls, most therapeutic.

people who pronounce "th" as "f" - ie the becomes fuh, three becomes free

people wearing sportswear when they are clearly not intending to ever do any sort of sport ever

people with inconsistent food preferences ie liking cheese on crackers, jacket potato, pizza and pasta but refusing cheese sandwiches. yes ds, i do mean you

i have phase 8 and monsoon frocks

and am definitely under 50

i would defy you to identify said frocks as those makes though...

any letter from the inland revenue, the sight of one always fills me with dread, even if it's something innocuous

amanda redman

she just looks smug to me

i'm sure she's very nice really

men wearing scarves like spooks actor did on who do you think you are, gone off him so much i can't even remember his name

Mayor - perhaps it is all Amandas, they are all vile.

Redman
Holden
De Cadanet

Now Mayor - your Phase 8 dresses are not some pink devoré nightmare, and the Monsoon ones are not jade green with a slight hippy vibe, then?

Dh asking me a question and then not bloody listening to the answer, and asking the same question 10 minutes later!!

Ds2 ringing me from his mobile, getting no answer, and then switching his bloody phone off so that when I see I've missed a call from him and call him back, I get his bloody voicemail.

I'll think of more!

Clipped smug voices on women - think Arabella Wier and Lisa Tarbuck.

Food intolerance instead of 'proper' allergies. Food preferences instead of food intolerances.