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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want bumsex during my lunch hour at work?

133 replies

showery · 07/09/2010 19:58

ok, i am sorry, this isn't about bumsex at all, i just said that to make you all look.

dp and i are having a bit of an argument and i want to know who is right. have namechanged because dp thinks you will take my side otherwise

person A takes the child to school
person B takes the one to nursery

we both need to leave the house at 8.30ish

we both get up at around the same time.

person A gets up, makes their breakfast and sometimes makes breakfast for one or more of the children.
person B gets up makes their breakfast and breakfast for the children if person A hasn't done so (they usually haven't)

person A then goes upstairs and spends around 45 minutes in the bathroom. we have a downstairs toilet which person A refuses to use.
nobody else can use the bathroom to brush teeth/get showered while person A is using it

Person B gets all the children dressed, lunchbox made and self dressed.

this morning person B remarked that if it was a nursery day they wouldn't have enough time to have a shower as person A has spent too long in the bathroom.

Person A asks Person B if they think it's realistic to expect to be able to shower before they go out

what would your response be?

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 07/09/2010 22:19

maybe i just need to nail his favourite book to the wall downstairs so he has to sit there to read it

onepieceoflollipop · 07/09/2010 22:20

Perhaps you and the OP could apply to go on Wife Swap Fio Wink You seem to understand the issues that her dh is struggling with. Grin

FioFio · 07/09/2010 22:21

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thisisyesterday · 07/09/2010 22:25

same here fio. i can't understand why, if you NEED a poo, it has to take so long

what does he think i do? esp those times when you're going and then you hear a crash or some crying or somethijng....

FioFio · 07/09/2010 22:26

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Habbibu · 07/09/2010 22:27

That's puzzled me too, tbh. Many male flatmates I've had have been the same. Good thing they don't have to give birth.

thisisyesterday · 07/09/2010 22:28

yes, sorry, i coldn't be bothered to namechange back to showery!!

leeloo1 · 07/09/2010 22:29

Aw, I feel bad for Person A - I don't feel that the lovely cup of coffee is getting enough attention paid to it! (Wishing my Dh made me tea/coffee in the morning Sad)

Also, tbh if you don't shower every day then showering when you're back at home with DC3 doesn't sound unreasonable. I guess it'd be different if you were taking DC3 out straight away, then you'd never have a shower and Person A would come and live with me and make me lovely cups of coffee instead be begging you to take a shower! Grin

FioFio · 07/09/2010 22:29

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SpawnChorus · 07/09/2010 22:35

lol at fio "unless it is in someone elses house"

SeaTrek · 07/09/2010 22:35

Just sounds like Person A is has got into the habit of a bit of 'fun' in the 'shower' each morning Wink. Maybe needs to realise that person A isn't a teenager anymore?

thisisyesterday · 07/09/2010 22:35

aww leeloo, the coffee is very much appreciated i promise you!

tho, you're welcome to have him for a while if you like lol

i think because i only tend to have a shower every other day (unless i have been getting particularly mucky) i do really appreciate the ones i have

i guess what annoyed me most was his implication that i was being unreasonable to expect to be able to have a shower in the morning in my own bloody house. when the only reason i can't is because he is in there all morning!
it was his first thought... not getting up earlier, not me going in first, but that i should just not have one

loopyloops · 07/09/2010 22:41

You've haven't responded - why can't he have a poo at Paul's?

MisSalLaneous · 07/09/2010 22:43

I'm confused loopyloops - who's Paul??

BananaPudding · 07/09/2010 22:45

Teapot, I think yellow and red carding your DH in the bathroom is a hilarious thing to do! I also think it's really, really strange to watch movies while on the toilet Hmm

loopyloops · 07/09/2010 22:46

Paul is a kid with a very nice bathroom. He uses Glade.

MisSalLaneous · 07/09/2010 22:48

Ahhhh, of course yes! Was getting worried there, OP's husband gives her coffee, I was getting worried about my supply! Grin

needafootmassage · 07/09/2010 22:54

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BananaPudding · 08/09/2010 01:01

I nominate the entirety of needafootmassage's post for quote of the week.

You'd better copyright "The iPoo" before Steve Jobs nicks it.

cockles · 08/09/2010 01:53

Person A should note that the whole point of downstairs loos was originally for men to go in. Upstairs is for ladies & children. Ask mother/granny if not convinced.

Heracles · 08/09/2010 01:57

Person C is on their first draft of the molehill

diddl · 08/09/2010 07:04

45 mins is definitely an unreasonable time for the bathroom to be unavailable to anyone else.

twopeople · 08/09/2010 07:31

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mousymouse · 08/09/2010 07:44

dh sits on the toilet for half an hour a long time in the mornings staring into space. if he doesn*t get this time he is really grumpy.
BUT - I adapted to have my shower in the evenings (saves soo much time in the mornings) and the "pits and bits" can be done in any bathroom.

Megatron · 08/09/2010 08:22

Person A is being selfish. Person A also lives in my house. The person A who lives here makes no-ones breakfast other than their own, dresses no one other than themself, takes no one to school. Long live Person B! Smile