to resent getting grief because I work in a private school?

[fuschiagroan]

OK, realise that people may say I am being totally unreasonable.

Just about to start my first teaching job. It's in a private school. At a dinner party the other night, my friend (well, I've known her a long time but we're not that close) was making lots of digging little comments about the fact it was a private school. Other people were asking genuine questions about the job/school, not being snarky at all, like 'So what are class sizes like?'. When I answered, e.g. 'It's fifteen to a class at most' this friend went 'God!', wrinkling her nose, as though I'd just said they had a school society for strangling baby bunnies or something. She also made comments about 'privilege' and 'unfair' etc.

OK, I know of course that it is a very privileged environment, and the kids are incredibly lucky. But why does that make me a bad person for working there? If a job had come up in a good state school I would have been just as happy teaching there, but this was the school that offered me a job.

I just think, ffs, I'm not an arms dealer. There's really no need for her to criticise my choice of workplace just because it doesn't fit in with her faux-socialism.

By the way, she got her kid into a great state school by moving into the (expensive property) catchment area - not exactly something possible for all!

Nobody is entitled to a "rebate" for not using state schools. Thus fundamentally misunderstands how the taxation system works.

Do people still have "dinner parties"? It sounds terribly old-fashioned.

And yes, private education is a luxury item.

Fuschia - YANBU if it was the only job you could get.

But I'm with you Starlight on private education being a luxury purchase. And far from it helping other children by not taking up spaces at state schools, well-educated, influential parents are harming the state sector by taking away the influence they could have exerted on the state sector if they used it.

Do you think state education would be in the state it is now (in some places) if generations of politicians and those in positions of power had actually used it?

Rainbow - unfortunately it isnt as simple as that is it - in a 'middleclass' area the schools would get even better than they are now and in a poorer area the school would stay the same but in actual terms would be getting even worse comparatively.

People will always use their economic benefit to get a better education in some way - if you took out private schools they would all just buy near to the best state schools or set up one of these new 'free' schools or home educate with tutors in a new growth sector - effectively going back to governesses etc.

Yes it most likely would as people would move to higher house price areas. As the op's friend has done. And there would still be unruly state schools and 'good' ones.

Was that to me Starlight?

Starlight - what is your actual problem with private education? The fact it's 'unfair' and perpetuates inter-generational social inequality?

They aren't going to go away and they are certainly not to blame for the current state of some state schools. At least they contribute to communities by sharing their facilities and I think marsha and others are right to say that, due to the issue of catchment areas, they essentially free up places around good state schools.

Was talking about her rather than you Starlight.

Rainbow, your question about whether state schools would be like this if people in power had used them throughout history is a bit redundant, I think, since the period in which education has been compulsory for all is incredibly short compared to the rest of British history. Most western societies are fundamentally unequal in the way you describe. History determines the present, and we can't just flick a switch and make it all equal. It's not ideal, but I don't see exactly what I'm supposed to do in it. I don't kid myself that my importance to the British educational system as a whole isn't roughly along the lines of drop:ocean, pebble:beach etc.

Private education is a luxury purchase, usually, but that doesn't make it immoral in the way some people seem to suggest. It's no different to the fact that some people can afford a Nissan Micra and some can afford and choose to buy a Range Rover. Bit unfair perhaps, but most people are perfectly happy with their hypothetical Nissan Micra anyway!

How can you change catchment though to address social inequality and have them being community hubs? It wont be a community hub if you are travelling from the other side of the borough to go to the school will it?

And I dont drive - how on earth am I going to get my dcs to a school miles away and then get to work not to mention use the preschool etc - it just wont work.

Re 'dinner party' - it was evening, we were sitting around eating a meal at someone's house. Isn't that a dinner party . The ladies didn't retire while the men smoked or anything

Happiest - well yes, those are 2 of the problems. Having such an influential set of parents not using the same education system as the rest of us does not serve the country well. Nowhere else in the developed world has such rigid distictions.

I agree that catchment areas can also be divisive - surely the answer is just to do something about catchment areas.

Rainbow, you couldn't. People would just migrate away and form 'good' catchment areas again.

UANBU. Enjoy your new teaching post, guilt free. The children of fee paying parents are just that, children, deserving of your skill as much as any other child. Go forth and educate without the hassle.

I can understand that. I just think my father would kill me if I didn't give my kids the education he provided for me. I fully understand how ridiculous that statement is so please don't attack me for it!

I don't think there's a right or wrong for private/state but I do think it is wrong for people to judge others on their decisions to use one or the other.

The thing is the wealthy will always try to find a way to educate their children in a selective environment. The class system in Britain exacerbates this.

(actually that should say most, not all of course).

do you think there is still a strong class system in Britain?

Exactly Chatelaine! They are just kids, not evil upholders of an iniquitous class system. Also bugs me how people think rich kids don't have any problems - they DO, and sometimes they need teachers etc. looking out for them.

Fuschia I hope I would have had better manners than to behave like your "friend", but I'm afraid I would have been thinking
The private school didn't just offer you a job you know, I assume you chose to apply to them in the first place - something I could never do.
But, if you approve of private education yourself, then you should just hold your head up high and perhaps learn a few come-backs to anyone who criticises you.
If you don't approve, then no you shouldn't have taken a job there.

I think it would be completely fair enough to say don't judge others for educating their children privately if it didn't have a negative impact on other children. But IMO it does (sits back and waits to be shot down... )

Some parents diligently put time and resources into educating their children, whether at home or school. It reflects their priorities. You cannot socially engineer that. It's about values. Either you are wowed by someone owning a BMW or admire someone for spending time on books. It's a lot less to do with wealth than some might think. I know of lots of materially well off families that are philistines.