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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect a 20 month old to not run up and down constantly indoors?

132 replies

plagued · 04/09/2010 09:21

please help - i am being woken at 6 a.m. every morning by a little boy in the flat above me constantly running up and down a very long coridoor morning noon and night (often whilst screaming and squealing with delight!)
On weekends he old often has a little friend over to "play" so there's two of them running up and down and screaming.

I mentioned it to my neighbours and asked if there's anything they could do, including offering to pay half for some soundproofing or thick carpeting - but they have taken it badly and say they can't stop him from "playing".
It's a while since my kids were that age - please advise, do you think it's reasonable or unreasonable to expect a child of that age to be stopped from running up and down - constantly, as a game - indoors??
thank you

OP posts:
PhoenixReborn · 04/09/2010 09:30

YANBU at that time of the morning I would be livid, YABU if you expect no noise and no noise during the day I dont know where you live so cant say if there is any suitable area that they could play outside which would be better for everyone involved.

HumphreyCobbler · 04/09/2010 09:33

it would be impossible to stop him running imo, but they should make an effort to minimise the noise with a carpet. It wouldn't cost much to put a runner down.

offering to pay half the cost was a good starting point, I am sorry that it didn't work

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:34

thanks so much for your response.
they do have a garden but it's down some steep steps and not very big. i don't expect no noise, it's just the running that gets me - i sleep every night in earplugs now but the vibrations come through the floorboards into the bed/my body .. it's horrendous for me but they feel offended that i've said anything it seems ..

OP posts:
belgo · 04/09/2010 09:35

YABU. The screaming is annoying, but the running up and down is totally normal, my ds is 22 months and does exactly the same thing, also sometimes at 6am. Children just wake up early, especially when they are put to bed early because everyone expects them to be quiet in the evenings.

Northernlurker · 04/09/2010 09:35

6am is unfortunate but clearly that's the time he wakes up. What are his parents supposed to do - tie him down? MOst toddlers have a lot of energy and running up and down a long straight space is fun for them. He clearly loves doing it and if you told me to stop my kids from playing (because that is what it is) I would take it badly as well. You live in a flat - noise is part of the deal.

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:37

distract him?
play another game with him?

OP posts:
HumphreyCobbler · 04/09/2010 09:39

I think they should try to help though - why not put down something to help with the noise? I did exactly that when we realised how noisy we were for the bloke in the flat underneath.

Northernlurker · 04/09/2010 09:40

How long ago is it since you had a 20 month old? If they like doing something that is harmless you let them do it because they don't want to be distracted. In this case he wants to run - he's not going to sit down for Ludo Hmm

belgo · 04/09/2010 09:40

20 month old toddlers don't weigh that much, and I'm surprised it is bothering so much with noise and vibrations, I would consider that to be a problem with the building not with normal toddler behaviour.

Who owns the building? Are you renting?

TonariNoTotoro · 04/09/2010 09:41

Some flats have rules attached to them which means you can't have wooden/noisy flooring in flats above the ground floor. This happened in a flat my sister used to live in and even though the people above owned their flat they had to put carpet down to minimise the noise. Might be worth looking into/

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:41

thank you
i don't think "noise is part of the deal" living in a flat
that's very harsh
i do appreciate it must be a really fun game .. i did say that to them

OP posts:
Northernlurker · 04/09/2010 09:43

Oh come on - people live on each side of you, above and below you - did you really think there would be no noise?

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:44

that's really helpful thanks - i'll look into it. The soundproofing is pretty bad between the flats generally.

OP posts:
Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:45

northernlurker did someone wake you early this morning ;)

OP posts:
belgo · 04/09/2010 09:45

plagued - then you need to look into improving the soundproofing, rather then blaming normal toddler behaviour.

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:45

thanks for your help, that's great

OP posts:
BabyDubsEverywhere · 04/09/2010 09:46

Could you put sound proofing on your ceilling? (dont actually know if this is possible?)

It sounds really shit, but that is what toddlers do. Mine wouldnt understand if i told them not to run and squeel because the neighbour down stairs can hear you. They just wouldnt get it. So then it would mean physically restraining them - they would be even louder then.

Thing is sound proofing isnt cheap, and they probably feel why should they for normal behaviour from their child.

However with that said, i wouldnt be showing any consideration to them in the evenings if they are unwilling to do anything in the morning. but im a bitch Grin

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:48

i never suggested it was abnormal behaviour belgo - i remember my own kids doing it at that age

OP posts:
Supercherry · 04/09/2010 09:50

Totally normal toddler behaviour.

Earplugs?

HumphreyCobbler · 04/09/2010 09:51

a carpet would help a lot with vibrations

I think they are being inconsiderate in not considering it. The OP did offer to pay half.

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:52

been there - do that
soundproofing's the only solution .. just hope they're amenable - i'll offer to pay for total cost and hope against hope they'll agree .. otherwise i'll have to move

OP posts:
thesecondcoming · 04/09/2010 09:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
plagued · 04/09/2010 09:55

THANK YOU!!
Obviously it's a mega emotive subject ...
I have to say it has been driving me
demented lately !

OP posts:
TheCrackFox · 04/09/2010 09:56

It is a bit early but TBH if you don't want any noise from neighbours you need to live in a detached house in the country.

sonotboden · 04/09/2010 09:57

flats we lived in ( they were late 60s built) it was a condition of the lease that all flats had to be carpeted. we had neighbours downstairs from us who took theirs up and all we heard was scrapping chairs and footsteps. we raised this with the managing co who sorted it out pdq

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