Toddler and Cinema - was I out of order?

[Eve4Walle]

Today I decided to take DD (6) and DS (2.8) to the kids club at the cinema. Costs a fiver for all three of us, DH at work and little else to do, so although DS is young, I thought what the hell, if it only costs that, then if we have to leave early, then so be it. I also mistakenly felt that people would probably be more tolerant as well.

DS sat still for the first 40 minutes or so, but started getting fidgety after that, and when that happens, I know a tantrum isn't far behind, so I let him slip off his seat for a bit and he pottered about in front of me for about 5 minutes. We were right at the front with 4 empty aisles in front and then the screen. Behind me was a woman with three 6-9 year olds I'd say.

Anyway, DS was being quiet but he was walking about, just being curious, when lady behind me taps me on the shoulder and says 'Aren't you going to make him sit down?' I was a bit surprised and said 'he's 2, and is he disturbing you?' and she replied 'no, but he is being distracting'.

I knew straight away that we'd have to leave as DS wouldn't get any better and would be liable to start making actual noise, so I told DD to get her bag and prepare to leave. She wanted to know why we had to go and I gave her some line, and the woman behind tapped me again and said 'oh don't make her go'. I was shocked again and said we had to as it was obv an issue to her and got up and left. But I did tell her I hope she was pleased with herself on the way past.

Got outside, rang DH and had a blub as felt sorry for both my kids.

So, if you're still with me, was I in the wrong? Would my DS have bothered you by walking about and being quiet? Or should I have expected this?

I think that by being complained to it made it very difficult for the op to stay, so yes, imo she was bullied into leaving.

frasersmummy Vue do kids club films for £1.75 and Odeon do one for £2.50.

Not sure how far the argument about prices stands up btw.

I mean, no one can help the area they live in, and what the cinemas charge. The cinema might do a really cheap deal, £2 for instance, but there are going to be some older children, eg 6/7 yrs, who really want to watch the film, and it's not fair that their viewing is disrupted. I don't see how saying 'Oh well the ticket didn't cost much' justifies that. For all you know, the other customers would have happily paid more to watch the film. I think it's a bit of a slippery slope to start linking how much something costs to how far you are prepared to allow the experience to be spoilt for someone else.

muggle - it's practise in this situation IIRC.

practise - the verb 'to practise' - s as in to Scream e.g. I practise my piano

practice - the noun - c as in ice Cream e.g. I went to football practice.

:o

You should not have left, gone with your ds to get some bribes, not fair on your dd. However it is a kids club so you expect some pottering about, general kiddie noise (not loud shouting or tantruming). If people who go to kids club want complete silence go to a non kids club showing, that the whole point of kids club, its amimed at kids and their habits.

Maybe , in roundabout way, she was offering to watch your dd for you, while you ran the toddler outside..

frasersmummy South London although technically that's the just the Odeon as our nearest Vue is in Croydon (so Surrey ) Is that cheap? I'm surprised as it's London, but I suppose we have a lot more cinemas within a reasonable distance so they have to be pretty competitive!

I think the other woman was being unreasonable to ask if you were going to make your toddler sit down, it sounds as if it was unnecessary in terms of her enjoyment and a bit of a hoity toity swipe at your capabilities as a parent-that's if he was just pottering in the aisle as you say. If he was kicking the seat, talking loudly, getting in others' way then I think that would annoy other viewers.

I don't think your retort was being too rude-she did make you feel uncomfortable and I agree that she made it very hard for you to stay after that as the situation with your ds would have got worse since you would have then been panicked and stressed every time he moved or uttered a squeak. It's the sort of thing I would only say if I had PMT though- have you got PMT?!

I agree that people should expect all that sort of thing at a kids' club.

At least you can think of a strategy for next time...

There are LOADS of petty annoyances in any cinema: rustling sweeties, people with those stinky nacho things,tall people, latecomers, people who go for a wee in the middle, people with annoying hair, etc etc!!!

I go to the cinema in the dome - one pound a head.

I,ve taken my two year old there, but I,m careful with the film. I find he concentrates better when he,s seen the film before. Otherwise he gets overwhelmed and disruptive.

I think it was fine to take your 2 year old. I've been to children's films with babies in the audience, toddlers chatting and wandering around. Goes with the territory.

People do just get annoyed in the cinema - I think they sometimes go expecting it and find annoyances in everything.

My aunt told me a story about when she went to the cinema - it wasn't a food free showing (yes, there are food free showings - maybe this goes to show how picky some people are that there is enough a demand, but that's beside the point).

Anyway, my aunt was eating popcorn and the man next to her tutted and sighed a lot and then said sniffily 'Do you mind?' so my aunt quick as anything said, 'Oh sorry, would you like some?' and offered him her pot of popcorn. And then ignored him and his tutting for the rest of the film.

The thing is, you might not be doing anything that you wouldn't be expected to do in a cinema, but some people are just intolerant and think they are the only people who need to be considered.

Dh and I took our only just two year old and our 7 week old to the cinema on saturday morning. Kids club was sold out so we ended up paying £21 for our tickets

We were prepared to leave should either of them kick off but the baby didn't make a peep the entire time and DD was quiet except for saying "ooh it's dark", when the lights went out.

We got the stare of death from the family behind us though when we walked in.

Personally, I wouldn't have let my toddler potter around in the aisles. I know she wouldn't just potter in silence in the dark (maybe yours does though OP!)

If my toddler had got that restless I'm pretty sure we'd have left, but I can understand why you didn't want to because of your DD.

I think I'm on the fence on this one!

Ooh, and kids club here is £1 per person! That's cineworld.

YABU

It is distracting, you are going to have to wait until he's older.

Peopl have paid for the tickets and they have the right to enjoy what they've paid for.

There is nothing worse than being stuck in a cinema/theatre with some selfish parents who don't understand that to other people, their tot wandering around isn't charming and adorable, it's a trip risk and a noisy pain in the neck.

Perhaps she was a little U but it doesn't sound as if she wanted you to leave over it. Slight overreaction perhaps?

You probably could have slipped out with your son and left your daughter to watch the film - I'm sure the woman behind would have been more than happy to keep an eye on her.

I went to the cinema to see a film rated 12A and it was ruined by a bunch of 12-year-olds who clearly had no interest in the film (Inception) and were chatting, throwing popcorn and looking at their phones throughout. Staff came to speak to them and that had some effect but it was clear they had no idea how to behave in a cinema. Perhaps there is something to be said for training children to sit still and be quiet during a film, as long as they're old enough to understand.

You both sound unreasonable to be honest, she should have kept her trap shut, but you completely over reacted by flouncing off (I have done similar before though!). Sorry if I have missed it, but have you said why you couldn't have let your DD finish watching the film?

Its very annoying to be told "its Kids Club, its cheap, you've got to expect disruptions"

I take my children to the Kids Club showings as I couldn't afford to take them often otherwise. For this reason I do get fed up when people
-bring toddlers who howl the minute the lights go out
-talk loudly to their mummy friends whilst their children watch the film
-make and receive phone calls
-allow their children to kick the seats in front
-dress their 3 yr old in ankle bracelets consisting of hundreds of tiny bells that tinkle constantly every time the child in question so much as breathes
etc etc

You see my thoughts on taking a toddler to kids club were "it's cheap, if we have to leave because she doesn't behave then it doesn't matter"

Didn't occur to me to think "it's cheap so no one else matters".

Snice.
I think I love you.

Good. I love me too

'dress their 3 yr old in ankle bracelets consisting of hundreds of tiny bells that tinkle constantly every time the child in question so much as breathes'

Oh my goodness!

What about rustly anoraks? Squeaky seats? Do they have the cinema volume turned down low where you are? Because, whenever I've been, I can honestly say there's not much I can hear over the soundtrack of the film.

And you and withorwithoutyou are my sort of gals

Or maybe you have the hearing of a bat?

Kids club = kids, so noise etc IMO. It has to at least be expected.

I haven't taken ds1 to the cinema as he would run around and be noisy. If there's ever an autism/ld session at our local cinema I will go. If someone complained about his behaviour there I would think they were insane.

Same principal here IMO.