To just fucking give up with my devil toddler

[monkeyfacegrace]

She is 3.

Total meltdown because her fork was the wrong size to eat her pasta with

Hysterical because their was a leaf on the strawberry on the picture on the side of her yoghurt

Wont sit at the table because she wants to sit on the sofa.

Devestated because Mr Maker isnt on, and she does not want to do anything else.

So fuck it. Im on my laptop. She has a bottle, yes a bottle of lemonade. No added sugar at that.

As you were.

lol does she have an imaginary friend? DD2 had one Bad Harry and god he was an absolute bastard everything bad she did she just looked at me and angelically said 'Harry done dat' ffs if he had been real I'd have murdered him

TSC - God you crack me up!!!

She does sound hilarious, but christ almighty... how you get through the day sometimes I'll never know!!

Reading this thread Im seriosly considering never having anymore dc's

I have 1 ds nearly 6 who doesn't tantrum (altho can get highly upset over other childrens teasing) and have always thought I'd have more.

Perhaps not if its gonna be the sporn of satan

Bad Harry!

I am now terrified. My 20 month old isn't at the tantrum stage yet (never been advanced in her life, glad she's not starting now) but she doesn't give me a chance to offer her two choices or whatnot. She just takes my hand and pulls me wherever she wants me to go. Every morning I think, I'll take charge and get her dressed efficiently and offer her breakfast and keep on schedule, and every morning she thinks ooh, Mummy's here, she can turn the TV on for me (drags me by hand to living room, hands me remote control, points imperiously at screen) and no I don't want my clothes on I want to feed the fish and ooh, look, is that a knife that my father has left within my reach because he always sodding forgets how tall I am?

And she's not even two.

JHW you have no idea of the mayhem ensuing from Bad Harry coming to live with us. From what I can remember he was blue, fuzzy and lived in the hedge outside the sitting room window.

Thank fuck he didn't actually live in the house just came in on a (very) regular basis to help DD2 create utter chaos and woe betide me if I didn't cook a meal and lay a place for the little sod too (he lived on cat food for quite a while lol cos then I could give it to the cats afterwards - I wasn't going to waste good food on a bloody blue fuzzy figment that helped make life hell)

Slap said child back!! That'll teach 'em it's not nice!!

Or it'll teach them that it must be alright to hit, because Mummy does it.

I've not read the whole thread, but have a 2, nearly 3yo DD who's into slapping me and being a pain - only wants a certain plate etc.

I also have a "just-turned" 13 DS who's being a pain at the moment.

Oh, am I'm heading rapidly for the menopause, so you can imagine the fun it is in our household....

Can I have some sympathy please?

PMSL laughing at Bad Harry - your DD sounds hilarious!
Are you not tempted to create a 'bad Mummy' equivalent? (chucking the fav v noisy toy in the bin 'ooo sorry, Bad Mummy did dat'?!). Ooo, imagine the possibilities.....
x

Tante

My ds has an imaginary friend (Tom) who ages very fast. He was 5 the same age as him to play with, then 18 so he could look after ds when I had boring places to go , eg supermarket and now he's 30 so can tell me what to do as he's older than me (I'm 30 2 weeks today ) and thats all in the space of about a year!!!

Toms antics don't seem to have matured with him as he is still a 'naughty boy'

You have my sympathy mumbar at least BH stayed the same (rather juvenile) age throughout.

His finest moments were managing to spill paint from totally childproof (pah!) paint pots all over the dining room carpet in the 2 minutes it took to check a roast chicken and somehow managing to flush an entire loo roll (still rolled up) down the loo - to this day I don't know how she he fitted it down there

AAAAAAARGH.

You know sometimes on here there is the advice to pretend you are being filmed for a parenting programme?

Well my evening would have been the bit where Jo Frost puts on her special teary face and tells the audience that she has never seen such bad parenting in her 30 years of being a nincompoop nanny.

I got frustrated and lost my temper about 6 times in the space of 3 hours. At one point I burst into tears out of a total lack of clue about what to do next. And the worst of DD's behaviour is just a mirror of the worst of mine. Except I'm supposed to be the adult.

I do have the 'how to talk' book and at least some of the time I think I do ok with the way that we do things but just got so wound up tonight I couldn't back out of it.

sorry, I will bring the funny next time.

lol and sympathies re Bad Harry.

DD has an evil stuffed toy alter ego who unfortunately does live with us, and accompanies us on most trips out of the house too. She has a very annoying voice (exactly like DD's, but much louder and whinier ). She gets up to all sorts.

Many's the time I have been tempted to send her on a permanent adventure to the charity shop.

I didn't deal with this stage very well with DD. I ended up on one occasion saying "I don't care, come back when you are a reasonable human being" and just going off and sitting in another room. I also remember picking up the objected to food and saying "well, I'll get rid of it, but there is no more" and throwing it all in the bin.

I was so bloody tired that I just couldn't do the reasonable/gentle stuff.

I also remeber DH coming home and me saying to him "she's an fffing nightmare" and retiring to the bedroom.

DH was very good, he sat down with DD and said "mummy loves you and looks after you and it's really unkind to be horrid when she's cooked you dinner or trying to help you. You need to be kind to mummy, as kind girls get lots of treats with daddy." You see this worked because DD was a total daddy's girl back then. Not sure this would work with non daddy's girls.

I had a (very trite but useful) book I think it was called Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and Children are from Heaven (pah to that bit lol!). One section described how different children respond to different behaviours, so where as your amazing DD1 would happily respond to being told what to do, others would need the 'if you do x then you and mummy can do y' approach, or with others a descriptive approach was needed 'now we are going to sit down and eat our delicious tomatoey lunch that you have helped mummy make so cleverly' (puke).

Oddly the descriptive one worked really well with DDD2 (dear devil daughter) although I did feel a total idiot in the supermarket quite often 'lets just pop you in the seat of this lovely shiney new trolley shall we and then we can go and find lots of yummy stuff to buy'

Aw AuntieBulgaria, be kind to yourself, as we all have days like that (even those without 2-3 yos!).

Hope you're having a better day today.

Thank you. This morning started with hysterics about not having been allowed to sleep in the dress she'd been wearing for the previous 72 hours. Yes, that's not that I wouldn't let her put it on today but screaming tears because she remembered that she hadn't worn it while she had been asleep.

I made a concerted effort this evening and we had a much nicer time - still an awful lot of 'I WON'T' but I didn't let myself get as frustrated.

Onwards and upwards...