to think you cannot possibly support a family on 29K?

[AliceBlackwell]

Please please please tell me I AM being unreasonable! My DH has been offered a wonderful job which he would love to take, but the pay is only 29K. Taking the job would mean leaving London, and while I do appreciate that salaries do drop outside London, I really fear that this is just not enough money to support a family.

Back story: we do not have children yet, plan on TTC in a few months. I am self-employed; when we have a baby I will have to stop work (at least for a few months) and will have no income. We have no savings, having recently finished paying off debt (credit cards, old student loans etc.) and do not own a house. This will mean moving to a new city, renting, trying to save for a mortgage, hopefully starting a family - all on 29K!

I have namechanged to prepare for inevitable flaming. I don't mind being told I am being unreasonable/ridiculous - I hope I am! It just seems such a huge drop from what we are earning now, and believe me, it doesn't feel like we are living the high life.
Please tell me money goes much further outside London, and that it would be possible to have a comfortable life on this money. I didn't grow up in the UK, and have only been living here a couple of years, so don't really have any point of reference apart from London. I know that we haemorrhage money just opening the front door here.

Looking forward to being told IABU.

If you are name changing them you have been here a while and so must already know that people on here DO support families on less than that so I don't really know what the question is.

You obviously could survive on 29k but,personally & in all honesty I wouldn't like to.
I admit I have been spoiled by a certain standard of living & perhaps it's a bit selfish & materialistic of me but,I just would not be happy to lower those standards.

It's all about what your priorities,lifestyle choices,hobbies,etc are.

OP, you say "live comfortably"

What is your view of comfortable?

Ooh Bristol is a bit expensive.Good friends of ours have big mortgage, tiny house in the centre(ish) but its a lovely place.

Depends what you need the money for? Our childcare costs take up almost all of my salary, and DH earns about £25K. We manage fine. We have the odd treat, and don't have to live too frugally, but we do have a small house in a relatively cheap area.

the differences will be in:

• rent/mortgage
• council tax

Things like utilities, groceries, gas will all be the same more or less. Maybe the cost of beer/wine in pubs. And obviously factor in transport costs.

Definitely get more bang for your buck here in Bristol than London.

Once you have kids, I do think that the cost of raising them is likely to be less outside London, as well. I don't know if it's a London thing or a city/rural thing (so not sure about Bristol, and will probably depend on whether you'd be living city centre or not), but certainly my friends in London seem to spend FAR more than I do on entertaining their children (classes, clubs, soft play, expensive cafes etc). For DS (nearly 3) the only things I spend any significant money on are pre-school two mornings a week, plus swimming lessons, and occasional trips out. The rest of the time we get along perfectly well with friends' houses (free), playing outside (free) and church playgroup type sessions (negligible cost).

Yes, you will survive, millions do. FWIW, we're a family of five (and four cats) with a mortgage and we muddle along - I'm SAHM with the three little 'uns and DH earns around 30k in a good year (self-employed).

Put your heads together, draw up a budget, and learn to cut your cloth. Also be sure to investigate what benefits you may be able to claim when you start a family - tax credits for example. Best of luck.

Well, we dont know where you are going. It is a big country .
Just go on some sites and check the rentals.

If you really want to save for deposit and family are you willing to cut back? A couple with no children can live fine in 1 bed flat.

You are NBU to worry but remember that house prices etc are much less outsdie of london.

We live in the East midlands and the average salary here is 19k (I think).

All depends on where you move to and if your dh is very happy in this new job then I would think that is worth a drop in salary??

It depends on debt. I realise it is customary for MNers to flame anyone that struggles on more than 15k a year , but our income is considerably more than that, we rent and have no children ... and whilst we keep our heads above water (just) and managed a week (an entire WEEK!) of holiday in Devon this year (first in 2 years), we are crippled with student debt and cannot save, or do much of what we'd like to (ie last winter I kept coming home with bright red painful feet because I couldn't really afford a decent pair of winter boots ).

We do live in London, though...

I could live on 29K a year, and have lived on a LOt less.

But i would not choose to, no. At all. It would be a struggle.

YABU.

DH earns aroud that, bit less actually, I'm a SAHM, we have 2 DC & a hefty monthly mortgage payment but we manage. Some months are tighter then others, we've had to cut back on a few things but we're comfortable & the children don't go without.

I think a good place to start would be to draw up an honest budget. Something like this, for example, which gives you some tips on how to fill it out. Then you can identify where exactly your money is going. Then you can look into house prices, council tax, transport etc. In Bristol and work out whether the difference in cost of living between there and London will cover the frop in salary.

If it doesn't cover it, drawing up a budget will help you decide where to make cuts. It's pretty scary how much things like take-away coffee, magazines and cinema tickets add up.

I had to do this last year and it made me feel much more in control and therefore less scared about the future.

You MUST be honest though - no estimating. Dig out your insurance policies, direct debits, receipts etc. and put the real amounts in.

YABU - We live in Kent, DP works in London. he earn 25k and 4k of that goes on travel to and from work. So 21k minus taxes.

We're expecting our second child. 29k will not be a problem especially if your DH won't have to travel into London.

'frop'? I meant 'drop', obviously...

How much is 29k nett per week? (not good at maths)

I couldn't. But my kids are privately educated which is v important to me, and we go on holiday, which is also very important to me. It could be done, but I would not want to

29K is about £1750 or so take home per calendar month.

threads like this make me so inferior me my DH and DD survive on 13k a year. i would live 29k but we arent all lucky to be middle class.

wow I wish I was whinging about 29k

Jem - nowt to do with being middle class.

Thanks GetOrfMoiLand

In Bristol you'll be paying around £900 a month rent on an average 3 bed in a reasonably nice (but not posh) area, so to be honest, I think you'll struggle. £29000 will give you a take home of £1800 (assuming there's no pension contributions etc), so take off £900 rent and probably another £500 a month for council tax, rates, insurances etc etc (all direct debits really, but not food or petrol), then no it's not really enough to support a family on if you're not earning.