The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Summer into Autumn 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice, solidarity and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.

Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. We love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too. You're here because you are strong and want to pull free. However ashamed and wretched you are feeling right now, as you read this sentence, I can absolutely guarantee that someone here has felt exactly as you do now and knows what you are enduring. It can change. You are not shameful. You are strong and you CAN do this.

All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.

I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.

These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.

Evenings are drawing in, the season of hot chocolate approaches. Power up with your favourite anthem (The ever-fabulous Dolly is reminding us "Better Get To Livin'"; and the Wilson Phillips girls "Hold On" in hot pursuit) and find your safe space here. Pull up a chair, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Thank you @GunnelVallquist yes this will absolutely be you in 97 days and I'll be here for it.

You asked me @Lavrander how I feel. These last few weeks have felt different to the months before it. Physically I feel brighter, clear eyed, not puffy anymore, and FINALLY managing to shift some weight. I was drinking around 30 units a week for far too long, but Jelly Babies became my new addiction so I've had to let them go.

Emotionally, for the first time in a long time, I feel stable, and peaceful. The release from the bloody awful vortex of doom hangovers (far too many over many years) and the shame I was carrying round. I'm letting go of it and just feeling so much lighter. I did what I did, and now I'll do better. I'm trying to keep it all simple. Not always easy I know.

And @REP22 i am now a little in love with Sid. Doing a hellacious hula just for me, and possessing emergency trousers was the thing I didn't know I needed today. Thank you so much for everything you do x

Good morning.

Another night of very little and poor quality sleep (and stupid dreams).

Day four.

I will not drink today

Me neither @mermadeincornwall .

Morning all.

House sold sstc!
Thank the Lord for that.

Now to find a new one.

Good morning.

And congratulations! 🥳

Fabulous news @WendyWagon. I’m so pleased for you. Such a stressful time. 🫣 🏡

Hello Darlings!

Thank you for taking the helm of the new thread, @REP22 and Sid! ⎈ Love your opening post, that's going to be a warm, encouraging welcome to so many people!

And some pretty powerful, warm, wild, honest and funny posts already! This is a great place to be sober with a great gang of shipmates! 🥰

@MagicalCrocodile Congratulations on your 100 Days, and thanks for coming to share the benefits with us, it's all grist to the mill and most welcome. @GunnelVallquist , I send you hugs 🤗 - it really does seem like being sober is the best, most loving gift you can give yourself - I swear it makes everything easier, though it may not seem it when our 'escape hatch' is taken away - it's a false escape, a snake 🐍 that slithers us down to the depths when we need to grasp that ladder and climb upwards 🪜. The advice not to think forward but just stay sober today is sterling.

@WendyWagon , that is marvellous news! Fingers crossed for all to go well, despite all the usual estate agent ineptitude and clottishness... Your spirit and determination will prevail! ✊

Coming up on seven weeks tomorrow. Slowly getting off the codeine, which I could NOT have done while drinking... And just by quitting booze, and still eating the chocolate, I have effortlessly dropped 5lbs!

My kitties had their Kitten Check yesterday - they are now 9 months old. Boy Kitty howled and peed in his carrier, Girl Kitty was spooky and subdued, and they now both feel ropey from flea treatment and they Blame Me... Chicken and garden games perked up them - they love me to throw windfall pears for them to chase, and we both enjoyed the scamper... 🤪🍐

Onwards, you legends! 😍

Good morning shipmates!

FANTASTIC news @WendyWagon - very encouraging.

Sid and I arrived to collect M. House all locked up and empty. Bit of a mystery but perhaps the reinforced gussets will remain unbrowsed today.

Strength and courage xx

Excellent news, @WendyWagon! Was the cottage a no go?

Have a jolly day gusset browsing, @REP22. I hope the empty house is not symbolic of anything unpleasant.

@MagicalCrocodile 100 days is brilliant and the changes so worthwhile. Huge well done, it genuinely gets easier I think from that point on. It was a huge turning point for me :)

Lovely bit of sunshine here today, I’m going to sit in the garden with my book.

Thank you @ShyMaryEllen - nothing sinister thankfully. She'd been tempted out by the sun to get her bus pass dirty. Foregone the gussets for now - Sid and I took her out to a nice country park instead.

Now I am going to follow the example of @FiloPasty and go and sit in the garden with my tapestry. x

Evening all.

I've been listing my coats on eBay.
I look like Flanagan and Allen in quite a few ( showing my age with that one!).

Milk has been drunk, the lovely blue top.
Trying to keep on top of the garden for the new owner. Had the lad around to weed.

@MagicalCrocodile well done on the 100 days!

Huge congrats @WendyWagon 🥳

@REP22 that is so lovely that your previous dog and Sid were such a big reason for your success 🥰

I find I can tie myself in knots thinking about nights out, events, holidays and it is so true what you have all said, one day at a time. Most of my drinking was done at home on the couch and I mostly don't miss that, so why am I so concerned with future situations?

@pinkclouds26 - I too have wasted hours, possibly amounting to weeks or months over all worrying terribly about things that may never happen. I've no idea why. I did some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy some years ago, to help with a different issue, and some of those techniques have really helped.

I'm a big Harry Potter fan; and now I do also keep in mind the wise words of Professor Dumbledore in the first book: "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live".

Mischief managed. 😉 x

Thanks so much for the kind words (and hugs) @Gribouille .

Unfortunately I have failed tonight and let the 🐍 back in.

I bought two small bottles of wine.

Evening all.

I have failed already, couldn’t even make it through day four this time.

My father is currently in hospital after a hip replacement.

My mother called me to let me know it had been done and that he’s currently in ICU.

When I asked why she said ‘Well, he’s not a young man anymore and with his other health issues it’s more a sensible precaution than anything’

😭

The whole call lasted only 50 seconds.

My mother and I have had a difficult relationship since I can remember (it would take too long to get into it all now on here and I don’t want you bore you all).

We are supposed to go over in three weeks and I am so scared.

I haven’t seen them in eleven and a half years.

I feel guilty, despite my husband telling me I don’t have to.

I have been trying to fix things for years and years and years.

I’m sorry, aren’t you glad I joined this board/ thread? 😭

I worry because my father is so thin (at least he has been for my entire life) and he has had skin cancer (malignant melanoma) back in 1998 and also heart problems (he’s on blood thinners).

My mother also smokes indoors and insists on smoking in everyone’s house (including my non smoking sister and husband’s house and ours back in the day) but that’s a different story altogether,

I shouldn’t worry; my parents have my sister, who has her shit together. She’s literally everything I wish I was…she has two children (although they’re 21 and 18 now), a career and she has no mental breakdowns.

The fact that I’m the older one makes it worse.

I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time @GunnelVallquist. For tonight, can you get yourself to bed, drink some water and try to get some rest?

Thank you @Onewildandpreciouslife , I have had tons of water. I always do.

I will go to bed shortly.

I will not drink today

Thank you for the wonderful new thread @REP22. Has Sid found the chop cupboard keys, that were accidentally in his bed ?

@GunnelVallquist sending love and kind thoughts💞

Morning all
Had a lovely day yesterday seeing my siblings. A couple of them drink quite heavily still and made some comments that made it sound like it was ME with the problem when I wanted to just say that - no - I was the same as you! But I didn't want to ruin a pleasant afternoon so I just sipped on my Nozecco and kept stum.

Sending support @GunnelVallquist. It sounds like you need another plan when you have stressful events. Something else that calms you. You CAN do this.

Morning all.

@GunnelVallquist keep peddling.
You'll get there.
I was an emotional eater and drinker.
If I told you why you wouldn't believe me.

Back to fight the legal battle tomorrow so I'm going to try to enjoy my day.
I need a new magazine and some posh fruit.

Bungalow viewing Tuesday. Not my style but it has a dressing room. I'm still hoping the buyers of the reck run screaming for the hills when the survey and quotes come in.