The support thread for those trying to lead an alcohol free life - Summer 2026

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!
This thread is for anyone who is trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.
There’s no judgment here – just encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.
Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.
The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation or a break, there are a couple of really good threads on this board that will be a better fit. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on.
So climb aboard and join the shipmates (as well as our dog mascot Sid!) and see how good alcohol free life can be.

A chop party! I shall try and add that to my common parlance.
Will it feel oppressive in the winter @WendyWagon? Perhaps though it will depend on what you fill it with?

That's such a good way of describing it @Gribouille - jangled and desperate- it is a bit 'off'. I've still managed to laugh so hard with people without the booze. But there are some events I've been to that have been filled with it in the past and are definitely not that fun any more - and I've realised that it's because they were never fun.

I don't normally get sad about celebs dying at all but Dolly seems an exception. I went to put her music on and couldn't. What a wonderful, loving life she lived. We should all be Dolly.

I worked out Dolly spent £1.5b on children's books (assuming £5 a book). What a girl!

I loved her wit, generosity and of course the music.
I'm a trained singer but I can't reach the highs of I will always love you. Makes me cry that one.

I’m so sad about Dolly, one of the absolute greats :(

Another gutted about Dolly. An amazing and inspirational woman 💖

Morning all.
Oh my goodness I had the most ridiculously vivid drinking dream last night- one of those where it takes me a good few minutes when I wake up to realise I hadn’t actually drunk the night before. I wonder if they ever stop, or if they’re like the “I need to take an exam I haven’t revised for” dreams that haunt you forever?

I will not drink today 🐞

So sad about Dolly Parton
I've always found her song 'Better get to living ' very inspirational. I often say the lyrics to myself.

I wish I could print them here but I'm not that's clever, perhaps one of you technically able crew could 💕

Morning all.

I had a great sleep last night. Ten days since the binge so I'm all done I hope. Next task thirty days.

@mermadeincornwall

People always comin' up to me and askin'
"Dolly, what's your secret?
With all you do, your attitude
Just seems to be so good
How do you keep it?"
Well, I'm not the Dalai Lama, but I'll try
To offer up a few words of advice.
You better get to livin', givin'
Don't forget to throw in a little forgivin'
And lovin' on the way
You better get to knowin', showin'
A little bit more concerned about where you're goin'
Just a word unto the wise
You better get to livin'.
A girlfriend came to my house
Started cryin' on my shoulder Sunday evening
She was spinnin' such a sad tale
I could not believe the yarn that she was weavin'
So negative the words she had to say
I said if I had a violin I'd play.
I said you'd better get to livin', givin'
Be willing and forgivin'
Cause all healing has to start with you
You better stop whining, pining
Get your dreams in line
And then just shine, design, refine
Until they come true
And you better get to livin'.
Your life's a wreck, your house is mess
And your wardrobe way outdated
All your plans just keep on falling through
Overweight and under paid, under appreciated
I'm no guru, but I'll tell you
This I know is true.
You better get to livin', givin'
A little more thought about bein'
A little more willin' to make a better way
Don't sweat the small stuff
Keep your chin up
Just hang tough
And if it gets too rough
Fall on your knees and pray
And do that everyday
Then you'll get to livin'.
The day we're born we start to die
Don't waste one minute of this life
Get to livin'
Share your dreams and share your laughter
Make some points for the great hereafter.
Better start carin'
Better start sharin'
Better start tryin'
Better start smiling
And you better get to livin'...
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Dolly Parton / Kent Wells

Aww, thanks for those lyrics, @FiloPasty ! I heard she was called the Dolly Lama by some people for her wise words! 😆 Whatever your taste in music, it does your ears good to hear songwriting that's clearly the best of its kind... @WendyWagon , did not know you were a trained singer! Is there no end to your talents?!

Disturbed night, some wild dreams, but I am starting to push myself to do a few of the things I'd been anxious about - chores, appointments etc - and loving the new way I can actually do things, like calming a nervous horse and pushing it on - it's a buzz! But think my body then deals with it overnight... I need to give myself space to process things at this early stage...

But I had a lie in and caught up on my hours, so all good, and - to paraphrase Dolly - here I go again!

🤗

@Gribouille trained pain in the arse more like!

I'm a chorister but since my pneumonia and lung issue I can't hold a note. I wanted to be an opera singer but as my mother failed at that I wasn't allowed. A lot to unpick there!

I've been fighting all day it seems. Blinking bank, Mumsnet thread (potty mouthed carer, I'm on her side to a point) and the DD is having a sulk over a shower cap. People, I think I prefer dogs.

Interesting point though I've only fought on twice with a thread in 25 years. I usually walk away and the bullies continue their pile on. Not today my friends.

I will not drink today

Thank you @FiloPasty for printing the lyrics. I think I will get them printed out to keep reminding me of them.

I've a bit of a trigger morning today but I'm determined to stay on board.So I'll have ready my distractions for when I arrive home.
My AF drink, bubble bath ready to run,Clarins face pack,LED mask and the book I'm reading at the moment.

Morning all.

It rained!!!
I was listening 6-7 absolutely marvellous.

I've bought myself some NYDJ now I'm smaller. I hate jeans, I never get a good fit so I'm trying these. Good American were £150 but I'm not paying that.
I've lived in three eBay John Lewis linen dresses all summer. Bargains but this 'Designer Lil' found a good fit.

I did have a chat with the DH about the bijoux cottage. He did agree we need an active village. He retires in twenty months and I will not remain entertainment manager. I might be able to persuade him although it's a squash and a squeeze but gorgeous. I've got plums for a crumble!

day 12 here, managed my sisters wedding without a drink so I am feeling very positive! I did think about/crave one a few times but the moment passed and I had a great time, this is also the longest alcohol free stint I have had this year so I am feeling very motivated.

Well done @pinkclouds26 thats a tough one to go through when there’s drinking all around.

Dolly…thank you for the lyrics @FiloPasty and a reminder to do more livin’

@pinkclouds26 wow a wedding is a major achievement. Well done you x

Will it just be the two of you in the cottage? Once you get over not being able to take all your 'stuff', you might find that you enjoy having less space - there'll be less to clean and look after.

I fully understand that you can't post links to the houses you're looking at, but I'd love to see them. We could give far better advice if we could, plus I'm nosy😀

@ShyMaryEllen I sent you a DM

Evening all
@mermadeincornwallhope you got through okay. Interested in the LED mask. I've been thinking about getting one and an off for ages but I think it would end up languishing in the cupboard alongside the foreo bear and the jade roller. I've always been very interested in skin stuff - probably because it always looked so grey and congested.. hmm I wonder why that was 😉 but it's stuck and I still love reading about all the ingredients and what's best for what. I love the science of it still.

Was lovely listening to the rain this morning. Not so lovely on the dog walks but I managed to stay grateful for the animals and plants. And Arthur was happy.

Well done @pinkclouds26- so pleased you had a good time. What a great start.

Thank you for the lyrics @FiloPasty. I put it on earlier. Felt a bit teary but in a good way. Instead of singing a ditty on deck this evening I say we have a rousing chorus of Better get to living. We have our ship's dog with Sid. I think we now have our anthem too.

Just catching up after a very busy few days - I'm so sorry that so many of you have been having a hard week!

I was raised on Dolly's music and have been catching up with her songs all week. At first I was very sad at the news, but I've had so much joy this week from the music and the stories, and from singing with my children, who loved her too. What a gift she was.

I didn't know the Better Get to Livin' song so that's a further gift! Thank you!

Where did she get that strength and generosity from?

Morning all.
Dolly had a deeply held Christian faith @taylorean, which I think was a large source of that strength and generosity. And she communicated it way better than most. One of the best quotes I saw this week was from someone who I said “I am an atheist to the day I die, but even I believe that Dolly is in the arms of Jesus right now”

Well done on getting through the wedding sober @pinkclouds26 - big win.

Morning all.
The dog woke me up.

No rain overnight. But a lovely breeze.

I had a whopper of a setback on the legal matter last night and I was sorely tempted.
However I told the DH to get his shoes on and we went over to the targeted village for the fish and chip van. I bumped into the cottage seller and established a few things.
Peace was restored.

Hair today and that hasn't happend for months due to my niece's maternity leave.

I hope we get some of Dolly's films on this weekend. There's a scene in Steel Magnolias where she says 'I've been in Spandex since I was 14'. It reminds me of my late MIL in a good way.
She was a ladies tailor and if you didn't have decent corsetry she was horrified.

Hold tight my friends for this Friday. Tis but a moment in time.

I will not drink today 🍅 🍅 🍅 (I have a bumper crop of tomatoes)

I did not fall overboard yesterday, but was very tempted.

I've been using my LED face mask for years @Lavrander. I'm not sure it works but I lay down wearing it,three mornings a week which is relaxing and good for my mental health. @WendyWagon will hopefully have a professional opinion for us on it's effectiveness.

I agree , Dolly's Better get to livin' should be sung regularly on thr decks of Hms Sobriety ⚓️

I like a LED mask.
I worked with the first light machine for beauty back in 2000.

I'm currently on Prai day cream. Just started this week after my £200 jobby ran out.

I’ve done some product testing over the years and loved the Medic8 spf day cream
I’ve just got a Philips ReAura so will let you all know how I get on with it, looks like the mask from Silence of the Lambs as it has a moveable neck bit, but hopefully it will work wonders.

Still sober here back in good spirits and not thinking about it now I’m home. Totally ready for school to restart even though it’s a GCSE year for me, well not me personally but I’m sure it’s going to feel like it!

We’ve got this shipmates x

@WendyWagon im v nosey about the cottage too, would love to see but understand if you want to keep location secret.

Hi everyone. I haven’t posted in a good while but have lurked. 75 days sober today. I’ve had a brilliant alcohol free summer - navigated a music festival and European holiday and loved feeling healthy and present.
This group has been a great source of accountability. Well done everyone! And thank you!