The support thread for those trying to lead an alcohol free life - Summer 2026

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!
This thread is for anyone who is trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.
There’s no judgment here – just encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.
Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.
The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation or a break, there are a couple of really good threads on this board that will be a better fit. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on.
So climb aboard and join the shipmates (as well as our dog mascot Sid!) and see how good alcohol free life can be.

Sorry to hear that @TwoNicePuppies. Try not to be too hard on yourself- sometimes the “safe” places are trickiest because we let our guard down. Another poster used to say it’s “feedback not failure”. Look after yourself today

I know that airport issue @pinkclouds26 !! (Although to be honest I also used to have big issues with trains too … I had a collapsible wine glass that I used to pack before a long train journey …. I still have it in my kitchen cupboard as a reminder of how bad I got. ) One of your biggest challenges is how much time you will have if you’re not drinking - I used to do a lot of shopping instead!

@TwoNicePuppies oh my friend I am sorry. We are but a work in progress.

Lots of water. If you can face it some eggs.

When we learn to ride a bike we may fall off a few times but we keep going. As a child it is the freedom of the bike, as an adult drinker it's a sense of pride and accomplishment.
You will do this, women are built for hard things.
Keep peddling. X

@TwoNicePuppies so sorry I missed your post earlier too xx and @WendyWagon its brilliant that you were able to get straight back on track, any time I have slipped, I kept slipping xx

@Onewildandpreciouslife shopping is a great distraction, last time I had a few months behind me I started to treat myself more, maybe a nice perfume in duty free instead of airport drinks is a good swap.

@pinkclouds26 I've been on this road for four and a half years.
I have never blipped and drank the next day.
If I've fallen it's been dire so not a chance of popping the cork so to speak the next day!

I've had to work especially hard this week with my family. I was shameful. However what's done is done and it was family. Luckily!

I will not drink today 🐬

@WendyWagon sorry it has been such a crap week, but you have shown great strength to carry on. I hope that doesn't sound patronising from someone so early in the journey, but I know how easy it would have been to have another to numb the guilt. It really shows that even when we do slip up, it is all about what you learn and how you decide to go forward. Well done xx

Morning all.

I'm appreciating this cooler weather.
I'm an autumnal girl. Tweed and a nice sweater.

I shall start packing up my summer clothes. I've been wearing trousers not shorts this last week.

DD is ordering all sorts for her makeover. I'm ecstatic. Some of the skirts are a bit short!

Good morning Shipmates,

Sorry to hear about your wobble @TwoNicePuppies - hope you're feeling a bit better. We are none of us perfect and we all have bad days. Look after yourself and keep trying. It will be alright. Better times will come.

Funnily enough @Gribouille - Sid was born in Wales! He is a rescue (Blue Cross), but was rescued from his place of birth and that was the Valley of the Lamb Chop. Hadn't thought about it before - it would certainly explain his predilection for our ovine friends. He thanks his beloved crewmates for the virtual chops and Babybels.

Strength and courage brave friends. It will be alright. xx

Sending support @TwoNicePuppies. Back on the ship with you with a lesson learned.

Was marvelling today at how thirsty I used to be all the time. Even if I went a few days without drinking I was so thirsty. I never understood when people said they didn't drink enough water - I was always drinking water.

💐 @Lavrander
Thanks to you all for the support, it wasn’t too bad, it was a couple which almost makes me feel worse, I could & should have said no. I felt awful from the sadness rather than a physical hangover. Thinking I’d have to post to tell you all stopped me in my tracks, for which I’m very grateful. I so hate looking at the app when it’s not all yellow, I might try to find a new one! Any suggestions?

I slipped on holiday a month ago, not badly by any means, just a glass here and there with DH or parents. I stopped posting and told myself I’ll start again once I’ve been a month back on the straight and narrow. Then had some fizzy on DD’s results day (amazing achievement) at 10 am. That I’m not embarrassed about. I’m back now. I’ve been out since and I can hold the line. Holidays are still a weakness, though not what they used be. Work in progress.

I'm sure I've read about other apps @TwoNicePuppieson here but don't have a recommendation myself. However you'll soon build up the yellow squares and have a sea of them looking back at you.
Hi @postcardgood to see you. Holidays are hard. I take it your DH and parents aren't aware of your decision? That makes it even harder! Do consider making them aware, they might surprise you.

Thank you for the posters who offered advice as I was setting off to a weekend festival, and was feeling anxious. I stayed alcohol free, felt good, slept well and saw some great acts. I slightly miss the high I guess, but certainly don't miss the lows. I like myself so much better right now. It's definitely something to hold onto.

Fantastic @MagicalCrocodile!
I'm sorry you also missed the high though. In my experience the 'high' is incredibly short lived or even non existent. Your brain tricks you into thinking there is a "high" but if it was once there it hardly ever returns. So you have done yourself a favour there. Not having the self doubt, loathing and anxiety is a massive win too.

Morning all.

Cottage viewing today.
Thatched, Aga, log burner.
Feeling very excited.

I did have a chat with the DH last night about last week's shenanigans. He didn't say much as he knows how much stress I've been under with the legal matter. I've just asked him not to tell the DS. I don't need the agro.

I shall glam up for the viewing.

I will not drink today🌞

Morning all.
Great to hear that @MagicalCrocodile ! Liking ourselves is a huge gift. I know what you mean about missing the “high”, but I would say that your first sober festival won’t feel the same as your third or fourth sober festival, and you may find that as staying AF becomes less of a conscious choice that high - from the music, the crowds and the experience- comes back deeper and richer (and without the need to wee as much).

Good luck with the viewing @WendyWagon

Good morning Shipmates,

Glad you are mending well @TwoNicePuppies - you really are doing well, even if you feel rubbish at the moment. I guess you could always reset TryDry, though that would mean restarting without the lovely stickers you've already achieved, and it's important not to discount all your successes in the face of a single slip. I use the free version of the I Am Sober app. It doesn't have stickers (I don't think), but there is a quote of the day. Sometimes also a flying turtle.

@mermadeincornwall - I'm glad the festival went OK, as well as the happy memories of it, that's a real victory you have achieved.

Good luck with the viewing @WendyWagon - I'm glad you were able to have that chat with your DH. And - you are already glam! The fresh cottage awaits!

Sid has launched an unauthorised recruitment process for a new sous chef in the galley. One who specialises in chops and can cater to a party of one. Below he is practising his "interview stance". I've nipped it in the bud. He says that, in that case, the next time we encounter an exotic privateer we'll "allow their galley staff to live" and come aboard. I reminded him that Long John Silver was a ship's cook. He went quiet and slunk back to his ships' biscuit. Much less trouble. And no encroachment into Sid's apple barrel.

Strength and courage. It will be alright. x

“Party of one” I’m laughing 🤣❤️❤️

@TwoNicePuppies - when I started out, I did Dry January, then “decided to see how things went”, with the inevitable results. I then restarted for Sober Spring, and have kept going ever since. I have 16 black days on my Try Dry app for the period between the two, and I always says that I did my best learnings on those days. @REP22 ’s post reminded me of this.

I am a big believer that we shouldn’t be ashamed of our scars (physical or mental) because they are part of making us what we are. Maybe you could look on those days on the app with compassion?

I completely agree @Onewildandpreciouslife - I have scars, inside and out. I would not wish the experiences that earned them on anyone, friend or foe, but they have made me who I am. I am stronger and have honed powerful coping strategies because of them, which have enabled me to endure challenges that might otherwise have crippled me. It's a stretch too far to say that I am thankful for all the things that have happened to me - but I am very grateful for the lessons I have learned.

To look back on some black days and think "I defeated those, and here I am now" is a mighty statement indeed. x

Hey @REP22 , on that subject, I was just thinking this morning that the last big quit I had - 5.5 years - was off the back of being ill - it scared the tar out of me and I wanted to do all I could to survive... So would I say I'm 'grateful' for illness? No. But I consciously chose to make changes and learn from it, so at least the hard time had some worth to it... turned an annus horribilis into an annus mirabilis...

(...and then I forgot how bad/important it was and fell for the idea I could have 'the odd one' and you know the rest...).

On the subject of chops, we say 'a chop party' to mean some big deal or extravaganza - it's from an 80s cartoon by Alan Moore... I'm sure Sid has the appropriate medals to be worn for such an occasion... we know he has the jewellery...

'Chopsy' in Wales means 'cheeky, talking back'... and that, too, I am sure is appropriate... 😉

Bloody good job, @MagicalCrocodile ! And I know what you mean about missing the 'high' - same with Christmas and parties etc to start with, I found - but it won't always be like that! Once you've been through a few 'firsts', got into the swing of it, the high became a much better sober high - true presence and clarity! One day you will find yourself laughing like a child, that effortless flow, and it will be pure joy...

Also, I realised how inauthentic a drunk high is - the chemicals tell you you're having a much better time than you are... Now I notice that, when a gang of people is laughing over drinks, there's often something 'off' about it, a bit jangled and desperate...

Watch out for the next day or two, because sometimes we can successfully face down temptation, only to relax and let our guards down afterwards... But this is one in the sober bank for you! Proud of you! 🥰

@Gribouille All appropriate.❤️ Sid is now offering to forego the sous chef if I'll agree to employ for him his own "Personal 'Chop'per". It's a no from me.

Evening all.
Back from the bijoux cottage viewing. What a beauty.
However it's titch.
It ticks so many boxes but we are huge. It's like Gulliver's travels.
I saw myself in the front garden having a Yorkshire tea. I got ticked off by a neighbour for going up a one way. A sign would be nice!
I treated DD and I to cake from the deli.
The estate agent told me the Chinese takeaway is the best around. The village reminds me of St Mary Mead . I thought right Wendy you can get on and finish that book. I have tweed and a cloche hat.
Deli too full of booze for my liking

Upset to hear about Dolly. Such an inspiration. RIP.