The support thread for those trying to lead an alcohol free life - Summer 2026

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!
This thread is for anyone who is trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.
There’s no judgment here – just encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.
Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.
The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation or a break, there are a couple of really good threads on this board that will be a better fit. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on.
So climb aboard and join the shipmates (as well as our dog mascot Sid!) and see how good alcohol free life can be.

Morning all.
I had some urges for the cool glass last night ,(it's been a rollercoaster week) but I got myself upstairs and away from harm's reach. I watched the surgery of the super rich instead. Hum. Not something I would do but if you've got the money and can afford the recovery then each to their own!
I must sort a pile of clothes I found in a drawer. Some lovely things but winter weight. I don't want extra stuff to pack.

Morning Shipmates! After the week from Hell at work (always like that returning from a holiday) plus a domestic issue rearing its head out of the blue yesterday, I was really on the edge last night, I was so tempted to get wine - the only thing that stopped me was my certainty I would feel 1000 times worse this morning if I gave in. I dragged my husband to the cinema in the end which was a good choice as it 'swallowed up' a difficult evening and took my mind off things, even if part of that was getting annoyed by some idiot bloke in the row in front of me messing about with his phone while the film was on.

Changing the subject, I was interested to read that under-16s will be banned from buying energy drinks. They didn't exist in my youth (except Lucozade in cellophane if you were ill 😃) and I have never been interested as an adult because I'd rather 'spend' the amount of caffeine I can consume without affecting my sleep on tea or coffee, but I wonder about the relationship between energy drinks for young people, and alcohol - the basic idea of a drink affecting your mood, giving you some kind of buzz.

My understanding (again from what I read) is that young people drink much less alcohol than Gen X did at the same age; if they are drinking energy drinks instead of alcohol, is that really something that should be discouraged?

@Lavrander you have no idea how grateful I am for such a warm and humane reply ❤

Unusually, I got feedback yesterday from a recent interview - the interviewer thought I would be knocking around the sector for a while and wanted to give some insight into the game! They said the numbers of extremely-qualified people applying right now are unprecedented, and to just keep going.

I work all available hours on extra projects. I know it will pay off eventually but it feels like life is all Finals. Opportunities are so thin.

I've also realised that salaries are just generally low.

My pension is in a good place, but I'd like to be able to pay down debt more quickly. Moving sector is expensive, plus Cozzie Livs and expensive children. Thankfully they love charity shopping and Vinted - but sports, music and wraparound care have got costly very quickly.

I know I have to pivot towards friendships and wider interests, but I'm not ready.

@PhantomOfAllKnowledge the DD is gen z and drinks iced tea ( we call her the southern belle). She's very anti alcohol.
The DS drinks rarely but likes champagne. He was one of the people I gave up drinking for. He has told me frequently it ruined his childhood. I think he had a lot of privileges but he remembers too much that boy!

Morning all!

A very eventful morning today. Arthur got caught in barbed wire! We brought half the fence home with us because he was struggling so much and got too tangled. Thankfully it's all cut out now but he's very grumpy with me for letting it happen. He's not the one bleeding I am!!

I think that's all you can do @taylorean. That's actually really positive that the interviewer contacted you - you must be good.

I was remembering the other day how when mobile phones were quite new, my Grandad would get me to show him that my phone was switched off before going anywhere where there were other people. He thought it was so uncouth to have your phone on in company in case it rung. I think he'd have probably wrestled that idiot bloke right out of the cinema were he alive to see it!

Have a good Saturday everyone.

Good morning shipmates,

That's awful about Arthur @Lavrander - it must have been very upsetting for you both. I hope he's mending well. I hate barbed wire - almost as much as I hate people in cinemas and theatres titting about on their phones. Sid would had had strong words with CinemaTit; he doesn't like that sort of thing either.

Sorry you're going through the mill at the moment @PhantomOfAllKnowledge - sending you love. Hope the happier times will filter back in very soon.

I agree that energy drinks are definitely better than drugs or alcohol. I like a Red Bull now and again. I used to work at a boys' boarding school. We used to have terrible trouble (usually at exam times) with some of them swigging too many energy drinks and quaffing Pro Plus pills. I remember typing a letter from the headmaster to the local shop, asking them to stop stocking the Pro Plus. You could spot the lads affected - pacing the corridors, wild-eyed. But preferable to the lads swigging spirits; that was definitely worse.

Sid is in the kitchen, chowing down on roast lamb trimmings from my M. He is well rewarded for his (time-limited) insistence that she is "the only human he's EVER truly loved". He is a shameless player.

Strength and courage. xx

It really was awful @REP22as I was on my own and he was so upset and panicked. But the kindness of other dog walkers helped us out. I just didn't see it - it was in a place that looked like it would have had a purpose 50 years ago. He's fine now. Snoring next to me peacefully.

Pro plus reminds me of the Inbetweeners episode where Will has an exam and suffers the laxative effects.

Found a nice white - divin AF Sauvignon blanc. Not too sweet. Lovely very chilled and I can imagine very good if you're just starting out and would like to avoid questions.

@Lavrander I'm glad Arthur is mending, and it's lovely that other dog walkers helped you. One of the best things about having a dog is the camaraderie with other dog walkers - it's easy to be friendly when your canine pals jump straight to the bottom-sniffing stage!

Good morning.
I'm so pleased Arthur is on the mend @Lavrander . My mum had a German shepherd who frequently got caught in the wire. Very expensive dog that.

I was up making cheese on toast late last night. DH sniffed it and all was handed over.

We're off out in the new mini. We're going to drive past the barn cottage and see what is like on a Sunday. Sleepy I expect. The horses will have been ridden out already. I can't wait for tomorrow's second viewing.

@Lavrander poor Arthur and you, that must have been awful.

I'm knackered stayed up and watched the football, what a match, and just lovely sportsmanship at the end. A very classy end to England’s World Cup experience.

@Lavrander that must have been very worrying for you but glad Arthur is ok

@REP22 I can just picture Sid happily chewing away ! Lucky pooch

@taylorean sending positive vibes
your way. There is a job out there somewhere for you . Good to hear they gave feedback.

the whole employment situation worries me, especially for DD who is going into 2nd year at uni- she can’t even find a summer job at
moment 😢

hope everyone is having a good weekend. I’m feeling a little sorry for myself with a sore throat and raging cramps. Been eating a lot of ice cream last 2 days 🙄 ticking off day 76 today - the 100th is going to come around quickly …

@TickleMeElmo1 DD has only had one summer job in three years. Absolutely nothing around. She doesn't like the smell of alcohol and is allergic to some nuts so hospitality is a non starter. I do worry for them.
DD may have to do her further study with the open due to ongoing health issues. My worry is she won't get much people experience without a temp job either.

Morning all.
Second viewing day and the removal company are coming to do a quote.
I'm sad in a way as I'll never live here again and it's a great house.

I was having a chat with the bff about long term sobriety. She said you're not addicted anymore. Hum not sure I agree with that.

Morning m'hearties

Very pleased for Spain. Didnt watch it but was nice to wake up to the result.
I'm looking for recommendations to stop a cat coming into our front garden. He's using it as his own en suite. I've filled the beds with bark but he's just started going on the gravel now. I looked at those ultrasonic things but don't want them to upset Arthur every time we go out the front. Lemon? Garlic?

Hope everyone is alright. Grateful for you all.

You can get a metal cat silhouette to stick in your garden - it's supposed to put them off if they think another cat is in there.

They hate citrus as a rule so lemon slices on your gravel might be off-putting.

As an extreme measure, could you temporarily lie pieces of hardboard on top of your gravel? Cats won't go on a hard surface unless they're desperate. You'd just need to leave it there long enough for your visitor to lose the habit of seeing your garden as his personal loo.

Morning

Thanks @PhantomOfAllKnowledge- will try all of them and get the drive resurfaced as a last resort - ha!

I think that thinking 'I'm not addicted any more' or trying one glass and realising on that evening you don't want the full bottle is how people have the merry go round of on, off, with alcohol. It would just build back up again and one day you'll realising it's making you sad all over again. So I'm not sure I agree with your friend either @WendyWagon!

Wondering how our shipmates in the earlier days are getting on. @Gribouille@MsAmanda@Grandmashorty. Hope you're still feeling full of resolve. If not, we're here.

Wishing everyone a good day.

Morning all.

I've knackered myself out dear friends.
Too much running around. I did the second viewing and offered on the barn cottage.
I'm just worried all my dates will clash.

I've had a few blips this year @Lavrander and they have been very uncomfortable. My journey isn't a straight line at all. I'd like to go on a health retreat in the autumn (something I always said no to as it meant no drinking). However I feel I need a new chapter.
If I get the barn I'll have to create the garden so that's a good thing. It's got nowt in it. I just feel I need something more. Our cosmetic innovation has stalled. Funding has been slow.
I'll never get another job at 60 and I can't do the politics. I have no margin for toxic men.
I spoke out about it at the end of last year and I stand by my words. (However I know I'm seen as a harpie/ ball breaker etc take your pick of the misogynistic names).
I think breaking the hold alcohol has on us does show us who we really are.

@Lavrander - it's also worth noting that cats don't like an audience or being disturbed when they're relieving themselves, so going outside if you see him sniffing round and simplu shooing him off will be a deterrent too.

Hi Shipmates! Thanks for thinking of me @Lavrander , I did, indeed, slip for a day on Saturday - DH said he wants 'a break from booze' too so we agreed to split the last of the stash to remove temptation... 🙄 But back on the horsie properly now, and determined to stick with it. My vibe is just so much better sober!

So had another 'peetox' - pished out 3lbs of water weight in one day! Was woken last night by the smoke from a forest fire a few miles away, so a bit woozy and tight-chested today... I also have a painful ingrowing toenail - never had one before - yet another of the joys of ageing, I guess - so will have to look up what to do with it...

Exciting step towards the barn, @WendyWagon ! Sounds like you have a few strands to deal with in your life, but I totally agree that getting sober changes your relationship to everything, clarifies stuff, and that's not always the easiest of journeys, but a very positive and necessary one... we can come into our power, or we can keep on numbing ourselves so we put up with stuff...

Onwards! 😄

Those following my adventures on the NHS might possibly be vaguely interested in the current chapter, but everyone should feel free to skip past to the next post.

I had a 'long term conditions' review at the GP surgery today, which usually includes LFTs. They matter to me, as I keep a record of their ups and downs, and have done so for years. The nurse doing the review has form for behaving as though she is paying for every test, injection or prescription from her own pocket, so when I got home I checked the app, and sure enough no LFTs had been ordered. I contacted the surgery and got a text from a GP to say they hadn't been done as my care is listed as with the hospital, but they will add them to my reviews in future (so no figures for this year).

Meanwhile, I had a routine US done on my liver back in early May, but I've had no results. The previous one had shown worrying signs, so I've been anxious. I rang the hospital, and it turns out that instead of informing the GP with a copy to me of the various hospital reports, the new system is to inform us only when there is concern. This means that there is nothing on my GP records to warn about what they prescribe, and no easy way to look back over progress, which is important to me to stave off health anxiety, which is never far from the surface.

So, the GP has stopped screening me because the hospital is doing so, but the hospital is keeping the results to themselves 🙄. The results from the other reviews should be on the GP system tomorrow, and when I've read them I'll try to get an appointment for separate LFTs soon. Meanwhile, I have asked for a copy of whatever is in my hospital notes to be sent to me, and I'm considering whether to contact PALS about the poor communication. I don't know if I'm being unreasonable as I'm upset, so will sleep on it.

I'm so sorry @ShyMaryEllen - that sounds really unhelpful. No wonder you are stressed by it all. PALS might be the best way to go. You've laid it out so well in your post; a copy and paste of that to them might hopefully encourage a few bods to extract their digits.

Sending our love and best wishes. xx

@ShyMaryEllen i agree to follow it up, I really like that I can see previous tests on the nhs app. Normally hospital letters appear on there though, even if nothing to worry about. So I’d definitely complain to Pals.
I have hypothyroidism so can see my numbers not that they check it properly but is helpful.

I think I would approach PALS @ShyMaryEllen

It's not fair to be left waiting.

It's incredibly frustrating.

I will say no more for now, except to entreat you all to avoid getting into this position.

I am not preaching (the very idea is preposterous!) but warning you that I didn't see this coming, and thought that every relapse was just that - it wouldn't matter, and many people were far worse in their habits.

Yes, they were, but it's a lottery. Some people win, and can drink like inebriated fish until they are 107, and others get cirrhosis in their 50s. Or younger. It's as simple as that, and you don't know which colour raffle tickets will be drawn for which prize until it's too late.

So. Cut it out, all of you. No excuses are going to cut it when it comes to the crunch.

I say that with love, I promise. xx

Still here, still alcohol free. Flying home from holiday tomorrow evening, so one last day in the sun. The last few days have been very insightful. Once the final hangover cleared , I’ve gradually felt so much better. Last night after dinner, I had a cup of tea on the balcony instead of another “nightcap “. Sleep not brilliant but hopefully will improve once home and my system clears out the alcohol buildup. Feel optimistic. Thanks for asking!