Calling Time on Wine - the next 100 days after the first 100 day reset | Thread 3: Continuing to support and navigate together.

[needastrongone]

As promised, a new thread.

As the title states, this is the third thread. It started for those of us who wanted some support and a safe place to navigate a 100 day alcohol reset. Most of us on the thread wanted more time and space than Dry January to fully reset and maybe reflect more on our relationship with alcohol than one month.

What we also found was the most wonderfully supportive and uplifting set of folk, all with the common intention of being AF from January for 100 days. A few blips along the way for some (including me at the beginning) but for those that have, we’ve tried to understand why they happened and most of us have continued to be AF going forward and managed 100 AF days since January.

We are going for another 100 (we all liked the idea of breaking being AF into chunks of time) and I don’t think it matters one bit if new folk want to climb on board and start from here, we can all offer a friendly and non judgmental place here.

Could I pick people's brains about something please? During previous attempts I have done things like the Annie Grace challenge and followed along every day. However, I'm a bit 'bored' of all the content and ultimately I've gone back - so was it really 'effective'?

So I've consumed less sobriety content this time and am enjoying having more time to read fiction etc... but, I'm aware for example that advice can be that counselling and CBT can be more effective in embedding when you're not in the middle of a big mental health episode. So I wonder whether I should be reinforcing ideas about sobriety/alcohol while not in the midst of drinking.

I hope that makes sense and is not too rambly. Really interested in people's thoughts / approaches...

Hi for me I read everything about how bad it was for your body and mind. Worked for me but I suppose everyone is different.

Interestingly I’ve read nothing this time round @CoffeeCupMilk in the past I’d tried various podcasts and books to reinforce why I wasn’t drinking.. this time round nothing! Just reminding myself of why! Why have I stopped, how much I was drinking and how unhealthy I was feeling. That in itself has got me through. Appreciate everyone is different and what works for one might not be the right thing for another - I just got bored of being told what I already knew if that makes sense! Either way it’s working day 108!!

Day 102, without meaning to lower the tone I've got constipation. I had this last time quite common apparently after quitting alcohol. Probably explains why I've been tired. I drink plenty of water and eat quite healthy so I'm off to buy some prunes. I'm going to start upping my exercise and follow @HeadingforaHundred footsteps and going for an evening walk.

Morning all, thanks for all the messages! I’m going to keep doing the evening walk just might start wearing sunglasses and a hat 😆

Last night was tough but happy to report it’s day 6 and I had a good sleep again. Tonight is going to be hard too.

@CoffeeCupMilk I’ve also read all the quit lit but decided not to this time as I found previously all my thoughts were consumed with drinking. This time I’m trying to flood my thoughts with healthy eating and exercise and good sleep. Also, as @therockingbird said, keep going back to my why, which is fresh in my mind. So not focusing on drinking and the effects but on why I actually don’t want it.

Sorry no advice @Icecreamhelps, sounds like you are doing all the right things already.

I hope everyone has a great Friday. I may post later too if struggling.

@Icecreamhelps try nutrition geeks magnesium 3 in 1. Magnesium glycinate is amazing for constipation or Wild Dose blocked bellies works a bit too well!

@Icecreamhelps all bran is amazing for constipation (I buy Tesco own brand) I didn't link constipation with giving up wine. At the start of the year I was a bit bunged up. I read a thread on mumsnet about constipation and a few posters recommended all bran. I dutifully went and bought some and had a bowl before bed. The next day I honestly couldn't believe what came out of me 😳

Morning.

@InItToBinIt - I think I have lots of different triggers and you have to negotiate the trigger for each one, if that makes sense? So my trigger for wanting to drink while cooking supper is very different to my trigger for wanting to drinking sitting in the sunshine on a weekend afternoon and enjoying a glass of wine. So maybe think why you felt triggered by the lunchtime with your friend but also that you successfully negotiated it. Trigger ticked off! Well done.

I’m a bit fed up of the quit lit and podcasts now too. That said, I really needed the support from them at the start, but it feels a bit like going over old ground. I think you should do what is right for you @CoffeeCupMilk , whatever that is for your circumstances. I’m the same as @SwiftyFifty , the health benefits or rather the damage I might have done and want to try to recover from in terms of my health interest me the most and keep me sober. And the sleep - oh the sleep!

Thanks for mentioning the ginger drinks. I found my bottle of Mother Root last night and had a glass. The fiery kick was just the ticket.

@CoffeeCupMilk Its so individual. I am v avoidant and scary health stuff freaks me out so looking at info on the risks of drinking or reading anything that looks like its labelling me as being an alcoholic would make me even more likely to drink. I've gone with the breaking down not drinking to a daily action approach. I try and do self care basics every day and give myself daily rewards, so it's no surprise that I haven't lost weight or saved and money. I'm v proud that I haven't drunk for 119 days. My skin is fantastic, I've just done a job interview for the first time in a long time, I'm doing long overdue DIY in my home and my mental health is good!

Hi all ,
@CoffeeCupMilk have read that the second time you read her stuff it doesn't hit as hard, because subconsciously you already know the information so it's not as hard-hitting or shocking to you about the effects, but that said if it's something that you think will reinforce what you already known to keep you going, it can't hurt to take a look at can it,
I' find myself resisting reading quit lit and the podcasts as id rather come on here and find like-minded women who are in similar circumstances to me , and read their experiences.
@Icecreamhelps hope you get your constipation sorted eek it's so uncomfortable isn't it, I know it sounds weird but I've always found a big bowl of lettuce helps , I don't know why but it does!!
@HeadingforaHundred get yourself that hat!! I hope tonight isn't to hard for you, could you plan on having a lovely evening in, get yourself some nice food in and maybe a face mask or something, so you are having a treat

Happy Friday all! How are all the new joiners feeling about the weekend? Friday was the hardest day for me at the start. I feel like I deserve a reward after getting through an entire week of work and parenting. Plus I have kids swimming lessons on a Friday so I get home late and always felt so overstimulated, I would 'need' a drink to block out the world a bit. Writing that now, I realise that despite my routine not changing, I'm no longer feeling overstimulated by the time I get home on a Friday so clearly the drinking was contributing to that. I hadn't realised that before, how interesting.

Anyway, stay strong new joiners. If you get through this weekend, they just get easier each week!

Just to say on this . I started dry January on the 4th and not the 1st . The reason for this is that it was ridiculous not to have a drink on a Friday or Saturday. It's amazing what you can justify to yourself.

Feeling a bit flat as I have the week off next week and going away and somehow the sparkling water isn’t hitting the celebration spot.
whilst I don’t want to drink, it just feels like a Monday night. I have not been sleeping the best and having strange dreams. I know I will wake up tomorrow feeling fresh and glad I have no hangover but it all feels a bit flat when I should be exuberant! I absolutely don’t want to break my 108 days but I’m hoping I don’t really struggle on holiday. Aaargh, I have found it quite easy so far but just goes to show that there are triggers out there still trying to get you! My own fault, I should have booked a gym class or something for tonight

@SwiftyFifty sorry you are feeling flat, it's horrible when the days just blend into one another, I think we are so geared up in this country for the weekend aren't we so this is bound to feel like a trigger,
Is there anyway you can go out even just go to the local Sainsburys or other supermarket and perhaps go and buy some nice AF drinks for the night, even some fancy flavoured Tonic water, and some garnishes , and make yourself up some lovely drinks for the evening with some picky bits, make yourself have a lovely little evening in xxx 108 days is fabulous 😍 what tips do you have to keep going xxx

I also really get the overstimulated feeling on certain days and was thinking this week that my particularly bad day wasn't as bad as usual... interesting.

Thanks @PeacheyPeach it’s stupid I know attributing every low mood to not being able to drink! I have a long way to go ! I’ve gone to bed- tomorrow is a new day.
the first month is the longest in that you’re counting all the time, the next month I was floored with exhaustion and then you get to racking up a certain amount of days and you don’t want to ruin it. The first sober weekend is a real boost though so I’m wishing you all the luck and we re all cheering you ( and everyone else on)
Sorry if this has been mentioned but downloading Try Dry or one of the apps really helps a lot of us!

@CoffeeCupMilkI'd not even thought about the Friday night overstimulation having vanished until writing that message so it obviously just gradually slipped away. It is interesting isn't it.... I wonder if it is the alcohol? It must be. I can't see what else it would be as I've changed nothing else about my lifestyle.

@PeacheyPeach I second the TryDry app. I think ticking off the day gives me a tiny endorphin rush 😂

@SwiftyFifty @Raindancer101 I love this app! I love tapping stayed dry for each day!!

Checking in dry! So proud of myself. Did 20,000 steps today 😆
Came home and ate a bowl of mixed nuts. Feeling pretty pleased with myself tonight. Off to bed now. Looking forward to my first hangover-free Saturday in quite a while….

Thanks for all the tips for my constipation I've had a big bowl of chicken salad so plenty of lettuce and I've had some magnesium by glycinate just now before bed. I don't think I'm drinking enough water so need to make more of an effort, I also read somewhere that my microbiome is still settling.
@HeadingforaHundred 20,000 wow I average about half that a day.
@SwiftyFifty im off for a week too, it would usually be a green light to drink as much as possible, and do very little on my long to do list. So I'm hoping to get some jobs done around the house.
@Yearoftheskin Ive noticed my skin is a lot smoother and my face is less puffy I look better because I've realised I'm smiling a lot more and my eyes don't look bloodshot.

@Icecreamhelps I would never normally hit that amount but desperate times and all that….

Yes, you saw the time of this post correctly. I’m up and ready to head out for the day. No hangover. No anxiety. A good sleep under my belt and ready to face the world!

@HeadingforaHundred I love my mornings now even if the evenings are dull af! I’ve been out with the dog now off food shopping. Have dropped a few pounds already this month after a really slow start with only two pounds a month Jan-March. If I cut down the daily chocolate it would have been even more!

Morning.

@SwiftyFifty I’m still having cravings, but I’m not sure for what because it’s not alcohol as such. It’s more the same as you - sort of ‘is this it?’ kind of feeling occasionally at night. I’m trying to remind myself that the last four years have been incredibly tough and ‘boring’ is a blessing. How long before the holiday?

I use the Try Dry App too.

We’ve a quiet weekend ahead, but that’s fine as we’ve a busy week after that.

The weather is decent, so it’s a good opportunity for outdoor stuff if folk need to distract themselves. I keep meaning to get my patio furniture cushions out the garage and start to wash them, then forgetting. I realise that does not sound very rock and roll!

Morning everybody xx I've been awake since 6 feeling tired but that's it, compared to how I felt a week ago it's bliss!!
We have a social event tonight, I wasn't sure if I would go but think I will, so will let you know how I get on!