Calling Time on Wine - the next 100 days after the first 100 day reset | Thread 3: Continuing to support and navigate together.

[needastrongone]

As promised, a new thread.

As the title states, this is the third thread. It started for those of us who wanted some support and a safe place to navigate a 100 day alcohol reset. Most of us on the thread wanted more time and space than Dry January to fully reset and maybe reflect more on our relationship with alcohol than one month.

What we also found was the most wonderfully supportive and uplifting set of folk, all with the common intention of being AF from January for 100 days. A few blips along the way for some (including me at the beginning) but for those that have, we’ve tried to understand why they happened and most of us have continued to be AF going forward and managed 100 AF days since January.

We are going for another 100 (we all liked the idea of breaking being AF into chunks of time) and I don’t think it matters one bit if new folk want to climb on board and start from here, we can all offer a friendly and non judgmental place here.

Because alcohol is a drug @CoffeeCupMilk , and it affects your brain like a drug. It’s just a socially acceptable drug (that a lot of us quite like 😁).

As everyone has already commented @CoffeeCupMilkplease don’t be so hard on yourself. Look after yourself today, you can always look at it like this - it’s 120 days (if est 3 months) less one day! It’s one day, which is nothing in the big scheme of things is it? So be kind to yourself and wake up tomorrow after a better sleep tonight ready for 121 days (or there abouts).

Hey everyone xxx

@CoffeeCupMilk @needastrongone @SwiftyFifty @IjustbelieveinMe
'm just going to say that your all doing amazing and it can be really boring, and that sometimes the thought of having a drink does really sound appealing because that's what in the past has taken us out of the mundane.
But also it does you a favor by having it , it takes away the mystery or the romance of having a drink, because it really doesn't turn into this magical drink in the end anyway x so exactly as what was said one evening of drinking doesn't ruin your streak and your amazing efforts
And feeling bored at times is good, it makes the fun times feel more fun!
It's rubbish when people have let you down with their friendships, it's hard to believe that maybe you're only wanted if your sinking glasses of wine. It says more about them than you xxx

Hi All, haven't posted for a few weeks but am still on track and at 45 days now. DH is still drinking most nights, or every other, but not as much as when I was also, and I can ignore it mostly. I've had some moments where I've considered it, but I think after so many years of on again off again, I finally understand that for me there is no "just this one night", it turns into "just this week", and suddenly I've been drinking every night for 3 weeks feeling bloated and looking run down and just feeling generally ashamed. I've been a bit unwell also which has kept me away from the gym, I'm nervous about maintaining that motivation... plan is to go back this afternoon.
I wanted to say @CoffeeCupMilk , I think the smartest thing to do would be to ride the wave of "tip the remaining wine out" when it appears, if you are like me and in 2 minds, I find that I have the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other, and they whisper kind of alternatively, and if that's the case jump on the moment when the angel is talking and do it, that's the voice to listen to, not the old habitual one that says "come on, one more night won't hurt". That's just my 2 cents, I don't mean to tell you what to do of course.
I'm really enjoying being available to drive my older DS around when he needs it, like pick- up at 9pm or whatever, he will be fully independent soon so this time is precious to me. I like being completely sober at their bedtime, hugging them good-night and not smelling of wine. I still love walking up in the morning knowing I didn't drink the night before. There is so much going on in life right now that is stressful and so on, I'm just so grateful to be free of alcohol, is one less thing for my inner voice to be yammering on about.. like "just have a drink" and "you are so shit for having a drink"... can't please it hey? Take care all, and thank-you for being here xx

Hi all, really enjoying catching up and reading your messages xx

23 days today (baby of the group 😂). I’m realising that I was drinking more than I thought from the number of times I have to consciously resist it. Resisted mimosas for breakfast! Out for lunch yesterday lunchtime and just didn’t mention it, it was noticed but the conversation moved on quickly. Trying not to bore closer friends with it, for me it feels like a major identity shift but I’m on my own with that in RL. Grateful for this thread x

One big advantage I’m noticing is that I can go out and do something sociable without writing the rest of the day off. This has been a genuine lightbulb moment!

@CoffeeCupMilk I just want to add to the voices telling you to be kind to yourself. Yes you had a drink, and it reminded you why you stopped, but you moderated and the regret you feel is telling you something about the choices you want to make moving forwards. ChatGPT would say that’s not failure, it’s data 😁 xx

Thanks everyone. Full disclosure - I drank again the next night. It wasn't fun again. I didn't last night though, and I feel better today. So yes, data indeed. I'm not sure it actually works for me any more?! Waste and time, money and calories!

Hi all xx
Hope everyone has had a good weekend,
Checking in on 72 days xx I can't imagine how I could spend a Sunday night drinking, when I think how I could go into a new week feeling so rough it baffles me !!

Evening all - checking in alcohol free on day 173. ☺️

Father’s Day can be a bit triggering with social media full of people gushing about their wonderful husbands and dads… mine is the reason I hit the fricking wine in the first place! 😂

Anyway, I turned it into a positive day. Badminton at the health club, followed by an outdoor swim and spa session with the teens, then a lovely steak dinner in the restaurant. Not a bad way to spend a Sunday.
In 10 days, I’ll hit the six-month milestone. I’ll be honest, I very rarely think about drinking now. Did I think that would be the case when I made my first post on 31/12/25? Absolutely not.

I’d tried moderating and reining in my drinking so many times before, but everything I read said it takes much longer to reframe the mindset - which is why I committed to 100 days in the first place.
Some of us have had a wobble, and that’s absolutely fine. It doesn’t undo the hard work we’ve already put into building a new mindset. If anything, it’s a reminder of why we started this journey in the first place.
Something I’ve noticed recently is that I now say, “I don’t drink alcohol.” People don’t need the backstory. That’s just who I am now.
If you’re struggling, keep going. Life doesn’t suddenly become perfect, but it does become a lot clearer.. 173 days done. Half a year is in sight. 💪

@therockingbird you are actually smashing life! Whenever I read your posts you just sound so positive and in control of your life, your day sounded great yesterday!
How has everyone been in the Sun today, this can be a trigger for some I understand, especially having to walk past beer gardens and things , remember we can always have an alcohol free drink and still have a good time if we need to!!

Day 173 here. Soon will be 6 months. I never thought I'd achieve those numbers. Other than pregnancy (where I had no problem not drinking) the longest I had ever gone was 28 days - and that was some major white-knuckling and craving.

Honestly, I also don't think much about it anymore. I mean I do a bit in that I think wow I'm not obsessed with wine - buying it, hiding it, drinking it, replacing it, feeling miserable from - but otherwise I don't and I don't miss it.

I do like an AF beer and I do like a mocktail if I am out. I'm lucky in that most of our friends aren't big drinkers at all. We went out for a quick dinner with friends (both French) on Saturday. She had one glass of wine. the rest of us had sparkling water. I love waking up feeling healthy and not worrying about what I said last night.

I've GAINED weight - took to sugar which was never my thing. Also past 6 months I have been spotty about exercise. I think I am a statistical anomaly. but fuck it I am healthier, my skin looks great and I am happier. I can lose weight the next 6 months.

For anyone who had a blip - it is nothing compared to all the days you didn't drink.

Also, the longer I am not drinking the kinder I feel about my drinking self. The reality was i was dealing with some very hard stuff while rearing children and I mostly did a very good job- worked, made a lovely home and life for everyone. If I felt I needed to numb myself after everyone was in bed well at the time it worked - badly. Now I have better ways of coping.

Morning.

That’s a great post @anewyearthisyear, especially about giving yourself some grace re previous drinking habits. I’m still feeling a bit cringe about my previous drinking, but especially proud of the change in my total attitude to drinking and also to the improved health outcomes. I shouldn’t worry about the weight/sugar - I’ve noticed an increased sweet tooth too but I’m so much healthier for not drinking.

Sorry @therockingbirdbut your comment re your DF really made me laugh!

How you doing @CoffeeCupMilk?

Did you manage to negate the triggers of the sunshine and beer gardens @PeacheyPeach?

I’m still trying to find the holy grail of a soft drink to reach for early evening while cooking. I’m fine with water and juice during the day! I’m going to try good old fashioned iced water tonight as it’s so hot! Other than this, I’ve really nothing very much to report!

Morning all
Hope we are all ok and not actually boiling alive!!
@anewyearthisyear I love that about you being kind to yourself , ofcourse there is often a reason for why we found ourselves in this situation, I don't imagine any of us have wanted to become so dependent on drinking but daily life, struggles, mental health it all has contributed to were we have found ourselves,
So yes being kinder to ourselves is needed because we are all our worse critic anyway xxx
I'm finding family life a bit tough at the moment, but I'm just trying to just get through it the best I can, a few months ago the first thing I'd have done is find comfort in a large vodka and coke or maybe 3, but the idea of that now just has no appeal I just can't imagine it now, why would I want to add more stress on myself by taking myself out of reality for a few hours and then waking up with the after effects! It makes no sense to me!
Have been spending the evenings in the garden with very large icy diet Coke and it has done the trick!!

Easier said than done @PeacheyPeachto not reach for the bottle when family things happen. I remind myself that I’m only trying to escape my feelings for a while and I’ll only have to deal with them at some point anyway. Fair play for recognising that fact. 😊

@needastrongone thank you x I think it would just make things ten times worse if I was to drink. I think being present with my emotions and dealing with things head on not just covering it up with alcohol is the right thing to do! And I can't imagine drinking in this heat 🥵 and sweating out booze in bed !!

Morning everyone day 172 here. I've been woken up early with the thunder and lightening. @needastrongone my go to drink at the moment is fever tree clementine tonic water with ice or just plain old tea.
@anewyearthisyear I'm also a lot kinder to myself especially my past self. I was dealing with a lot of emotional pain and alcohol helped at first until it became a problem.
@PeacheyPeach urgh the thought of waking up hungover in this heat doesn't bare thinking of.

Nothing really to report here, I get an occasional thought about enjoying a glass of wine but it doesn't linger, it's usually because I'm hungry, thirsty or bored.
Time has been one of the biggest gifts, I have a lot more of it where I'm completely conscious and not dumbed down or in a haze. I'm spending less time on my phone doom scrolling this has definitely helped with my mental health.

Hi everyone xx

28 days today.

i think subconsciously this might have been what i was aiming for, because all of a sudden I’m struggling. Might be the sunshine too. Went to collect DD this evening and driving past everyone sitting out in the sun having a lovely drink made me gut-wrenchingly jealous. I know I could go out and have something AF. But drinking is such a part of my mindset. Urgh.

Currently reminding myself why I want to make a change, having a cup of tea and posting here to take my mind off it.

Hello all x
Hope you're all doing well x had a bit of a wobble today! Went clothes shopping with my teens and everywhere was filled with people on afternoon day drinks, gangs of people sat out side bars all laughing and having a general good time and I as I walked past I thought , I'm going to have a few drinks tonight, infact I want to get drink a lot!!
But then the idea of actually buying wine made me laugh and then the actual thought of drinking and feeling rough tomorrow I just couldn't be bothered!!

@PeacheyPeach i definitely had a bit of FOMO on Friday 😊 The hot sunny weather has been my biggest AF challenge yet.

Another weekend done though, and a full month. Had a really tasty mocktail at lunch today, definitely didn’t feel that I was missing out.

@DaftPenguin wow you are doing amazing, a whole month down , do you feel it's gone quickly?
I think that mocktails and AF drinks are the way forward, you don't feel like your missing out do you, when they bring the tray round with everyone's drinks on, a big pint of coke would make me feel like I was missing out a bit but the mocktails just look part of it all,

Checking in on day 181..!!! Woohoo 🥳 this weekend was certainly a test, everyone around the pool sipping cold beer/prosecco and little old me on the strawberry lemonade mocktails. Surprised myself really, didn’t feel at all affected by it. If anything I was delighted to be completely sober and in charge of my actions. I’ve got two large events coming up - three nights away for a conference (I’m chairing one and panel speaker on two - so need my wits about me), the other is the summer off-site which last year was a complete mess ending with me taking myself to bed after far too many glasses of wine and 8 tequila shots 🥴 I woke up drunk did a 10k run and somehow won the treasurer hunt. I spent the weekend full of remorse mortified! This year will be very different. Clear head and far healthier than I was this time last year. I won’t be tempted to participate in the drinking and intend to get to bed early and lead the run the following morning in better shape than ever. Well done @DaftPenguinbet your starting to notice the difference in your appearance by now, the puffiness starts to fade and the whites in your eyes are getting better 😀 keep going my lovely! I hope you are all surviving this sudden heatwave.. it’s been relentless!

Morning all. Well done to everyone surviving the heat AND not drinking!
Six Months sober today. Something I’m proud to but never thought I’d get to write!
It’s been life changing and mostly in a really good way. No anxiety or internal hatred and disappointment and no awful hangovers are the best part! Also significant weight loss and someone recently said I was glowing.
No real negatives except it can feel a bit flat but I think if I had more of a social life thst would help as I sometimes sit in alone ( well most nights) and think is this it. But I know it’s not that I need alcohol it’s that I need something more in my life to keep me occupied ( although have become obsessed with Pilates)
Oh and the sleep- now that is life changingly good!
Anywary, just wanted to share as this place has been so helpful to me.
200 days in a couple weeks which will be the second challenge done!

Good morning! I’ve been lurking along since thread one and have finally decided to step forward from the shadows.
It’ll be day one for me today. I’ve signed up for a 10k in 6 weeks and it’s time to put the wine down. I’ve managed 60 days before but this time I need to make it a more permanent decision.
Thanks for the fabulous thread - all of you are incredibly inspiring

Welcome @WhatMaggieDidNextit is a lovely supportive group here in deed!
congratulations @SwiftyFiftyyay you did it!
but I have also become obsessed with Pilates which I now do 3 times a week! How funny!! I really look forward to the classes and can’t believe that not so long ago the time I spend doing Pilates - I was sitting on the sofa drinking red wine - hark at us lol!!!