Calling Time on Wine - the next 100 days after the first 100 day reset | Thread 3: Continuing to support and navigate together.

[needastrongone]

As promised, a new thread.

As the title states, this is the third thread. It started for those of us who wanted some support and a safe place to navigate a 100 day alcohol reset. Most of us on the thread wanted more time and space than Dry January to fully reset and maybe reflect more on our relationship with alcohol than one month.

What we also found was the most wonderfully supportive and uplifting set of folk, all with the common intention of being AF from January for 100 days. A few blips along the way for some (including me at the beginning) but for those that have, we’ve tried to understand why they happened and most of us have continued to be AF going forward and managed 100 AF days since January.

We are going for another 100 (we all liked the idea of breaking being AF into chunks of time) and I don’t think it matters one bit if new folk want to climb on board and start from here, we can all offer a friendly and non judgmental place here.

Thanks @PeacheyPeach , that is exactly how I felt, am still cringing everytime I remember it. On the plus side, I rarely meet that particular group of colleagues, so hopefully it's just a funny story they recount tonight at home and move on tomorrow. I'm hoping that sleeping on it helps!

I must admit I would DIE if that happened to me, but it makes for a hilarious story 🤩

@QldGCandproud having gone through a brutal company merger and many uncomfortable teams meetings I’m fully aware of the need to knock back a drink or two after work 😬 did it help - absolutely not! Truth is, we face difficult situations day in day out, with or without alcohol and we just need to navigate them as best we can. The clarity I’ve got from being alcohol free for 132 days far outweighs the need to block it out. Sure - it was an uncomfortable meeting, so what. Own it and move forward, you can’t let that make you slip - let it make you stronger! Welcome to our new member @Uncertain111 we are such a friendly supportive group, please lean in when you need to.

@QldGCandproud to be honest I would read that as you are only human and I personally don't think it's the end of the world. I'm sure they all feel the same sometimes, they just cover it up (and maybe don't share the screen when they're typing about it 😅). They won't be thinking about it as much as you are so try not to dwell (easier said than done I know!).

Day 21 here, so exactly 3 weeks and I'm feeling really good. There were some close calls in the first couple of weeks but now I don't feel tempted at all. My mind has shifted to 'what am I going to do this evening' rather than 'should I have a glass bottle of wine'.

@QldGCandproudoh my god, well done for carrying on with the meeting and getting through it despite what happened. There is nothing worse than a shared screen, it is so dangerous and just screaming for attention lol! I haven’t experienced anything quite as bad as you, but one time I was sharing my screen and my teams message notifications were on and announced to the world ‘someone is eating an APPLE’’ it was another team member in the office who couldn’t stand hearing people eating. Needless to say the execs in the meeting I was in did chuckle. But at least with yourself, it was honesty and vulnerability, you did nothing wrong, it was an easy mistake.
welcome to the thread and keep persevering, it only gets better, honestly.

Sorry to hear you had a tricky meeting but it was an easy mistake to make and I wouldn’t have thought anything of you that was negative. Well done for ignoring that trigger.

today is only day two for me and luckily I’ve had no trigger but your story from today has reminded me how hard I’ll find it to abstain when I have a difficult day. Solidarity!!

Morning all hope you're all feeling refreshed!
I have to admit I've really noticed the difference in my sleep since not drinking, it's such a deep sleep, Its like I've been knocked out! I'm putting it down to the magnesium I take before bed as well!
Day 33 for me today, you know I actually can't imagine buying a bottle of wine at the moment, one of Ds friends who stayed over at the weekend left a full bottle of vodka here, they said they didn't want it , Ive just popped it in the cupboard and didn't even feel tempted by it, it's almost like my brain has closed down to it, which is a great feeling tbh,
@Uncertain111 hope your first week goes well, once you get past that I feel it gets easier, keep coming on here tho, it's great to read people's thoughts and experiences and it's great for support xxx

Hi all! Just dropping by to say I'm still here but have had problems getting into MN on my phone 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm on day 10 here. Which is 115 total for the year and 4 days drinking. I drank when we went on holiday in early May. Not ideal but I'm ok with it as it showed me that I do have the capacity to drink in moderation. One evening I had one small glass of wine, didn't fancy another so I was done and I left it there. Never before have I been done after one glass of wine! Over the 3 days, I recorded my drinks on the app and I came in (just!) under the weekly recommended units, so I'm happy with that. The main thing for me is I still haven't drank at home or solo. I'd drink that and more in a single session last year, so I feel like I'm in a pretty good place.

There's nothing in the diary until July so that will give me hopefully another 2 month AF streak! Hope everyone's doing well. I'm reading back to see what you've all been up to, it's been busy here!

Day three - I had a trigger or three!! But had a different (non-alcohol) drink instead

Just reading through the posts and I'm wondering how I've lost so many days compared to people who started at the same time as me. I've realised that 115 days was my streak 🙈 I'm on 130 total AF days for 2026. I've just gained 2 weeks, what a result. You can tell I've stopped counting can't you 😂

A belated congratulations for hitting 100 days @partyfoodpickingpiggy

@Raindancer101 wow that's even better that you're at the point were you're not counting, it's just part of your life x getting to the point were you can drink in moderation is fab, just having a couple on holiday is my goal but I'm definitely not there yet I don't think! So you've done so well at being at this point, xxx

Day 34 for me x we have friends coming for Sunday lunch this weekend, the friends that we have coming over are my " drink" friends they love a few bottles of wine with meals so I think I'm going to have to dig deep with this one!
I'm going to have all my usual drinks that id usually have with a Sunday lunch but just make them Af , so couple of gin and tonics to start but have no gin and processco but make it noncescco !!
Usually though I'd be having a couple of vodkas when they went home but haven't found an AF vodka replacement yet!
Also it makes me feel quite sick to think how much I could drink in just one afternoon 🤢 my poor liver must have been crying x

@PeacheyPeach isn’t it funny how you change. The friend I went on the lunch with last Saturday ( blotto puking etc) is going to get neighbours tonight for champagne. My first thought was “ not drinking again!” Then caught myself and had a word as I would have probably also drank midweek back in the day!
I find myself occasionally thinking oh wouldn’t it be nice to get a bottle of wine to liven the mood/ relieve the boredom/ mark the weekend but I honestly physically couldn’t bring myself to trot to the shop to get one. I reckon I kept the local shop afloat during Covid ( the Shame!)
I have a day off work today usually I would have got drink last night but not now. Up at six and no hangover. I’m still shocked at the change !

@SwiftyFifty I know it's crazy isn't it,
I could easily drink 3 vodkas on a week night and once I started that , it would be nightly, so then add in the odd weekend with friends over I would obviously drink more, I think I have a very addictive personality so once I start that's it, but if I just leave it alone Im not craving it or anything,
I know what you mean about marking the weekend making it feel different but I think having a nice meal or picky bits from M&S etc could be a way,

Well today marks 135 days alcohol free 😮 honestly cannot believe I’m still going strong. Been at a work off site day all day, the drinks came out at 4pm I had one coke and I promptly left the building.. I was completely fine about not staying on to get merry and talk sh*t. Keep going @Uncertain111 you’re doing great. Every day alcohol free is a win. Manage those triggers and remember why you started this! I have a dinner party Sunday - that’s my next real challenge, the drinks will definitely be flowing so I need to be prepared for it.

@PeacheyPeach Thank you. I'm happy with where I'm at but there's still work to be done. 100 days is a great reset but I've been a problematic drinker pretty much my whole adult life, so that's got to take some undoing. But I'm on the right path I think 🥳

Good luck for the Sunday lunch. Do your friends know you're not drinking at the moment? I love the idea of having your usual drinks but just AF. You'll hopefully not feel like you're missing out!

@Raindancer101 I think DH has mentioned that I'm not drinking at the moment to them so it's already prepared me in a way but good news also I found out yesterday afternoon that one of my friends who is coming has also decided to stop drinking and hasn't drank for about 3 months!. What's crazy is , we were at theirs for dinner a few months ago and I didn't even notice she wasn't ( I was probably making my way through a bottle of wine to even realize 🤢) so it will be good to know someone else isn't also x

130 days sober today.
bloody hell!
I’ve had many moments of stress & anxiety where in the past I would have drank to numb myself, but I am facing everything head on with only a packet of dark chocolate liquorice or hob nobs to soothe - oh and a wonderful dog who makes me laugh everyday.

No real weight loss but I am resigning myself to the fact I’m 53 on HRT and anti depressants with a stressful job trying to navigate life as a child free single woman living on the other side of the world with no family around me for support. The weight is not important right now.

Welcome to all the newbies and lurkers braving this life changing experience. Wherever you are in the process we are here to offer support if you need it. You are not alone.

Day 135 here - and had to calculate it. I no longer think about the number every day. I'm so so happy I did this and I know I wouldn't have without that first thread and the subsequent support. No weight loss here either @IjustbelieveinMe but that isn't my priority - not drinking is my priority. And my skin does look great.

Welcome to everyone - this is such a great thing to do whether it is only for the break or for a total life change.

Morning all xx so I've made my first goal today, when I started this I put on the dry dry app that I wanted to do 36 days which was from Saturday 11th April to today, I wasn't sure if I could stick to it as my dry January for this year lasted a week!! so I'm super pleased with myself, I'm going to obviously keep going now with my AF journey as I really want to get to 100 days and beyond.
For me it's about changing my mindset, I was so stuck in the mentality that I had to drink to enjoy myself, that drinking gives me confidence, that drinking is a way of passing the time, of handing stressful situations and dealing with daily life, but for me none of its true! I don't have a better time because I come home and then spend days later regretting my behavior, about what I said or didn't say! That confidence is fake because I'm not really being me, This month we've had stress and upset in the family and I've just dealt with it, probably better than before because I'm not dealing with a hangover on top of it!
And life is actually the same if you drink or don't, so my evenings haven't felt terrible because I'm not drinking in the evening, we still watch Netflix series and I do my skincare stuff, nice baths etc none of thats stopped because I haven't opened a bottle of vodka!
Sorry for the essay, I'm not expecting anyone to read my ramblings I just needed to write this down!!
Anyway after all that, hope everyone has a good Saturday, I have morning of cleaning the house, touch of Diy and , we are watching the Eurovision tonight, got the snacks ready!! Honestly I've become all about the savory snacks now, Im loving a crisp lately!!

Great to catch up on everyone's posts, and hear how you are all handling difficult or triggering situations, you are all so determined and committed. I have just passed the 2 week mark, and I feel like this time there is a real difference. I feel like I've dropped that sense of dissapointment that I may never be able drink again. That thought just gives me an "and so?" feeling rather than a sense of loss, you know? I just have no interest in a drink. It barely crosses my mind even when DH has a couple of drinks a couple of nights a week and he has cut back too because I'm not joining him, which is great as well. I'm loving going to the gym and find that my mood is lifted the next day after I've been. Stay awesome, and thanks so much just for being there and posting ❤️ I really think you guys have helped me to take a new approach to this time.

Evening.

Hope everything is okay people.

One of our close friends had a heart attack yesterday, it’s not looking good at this stage. We are so shocked. They have really not looked after their health over the years, drank far too much, significantly overweight and no fitness at all. I’ve worried about them for years in truth, but it’s not my place to say anything of course. You get away with it until you get to a certain age and then you don’t anymore. It’s made me even more determined to keep going. I don’t want to get away with it until I don’t. I’m so sad tonight.

Everyone looks like they are doing so well and I’ll be back tomorrow to post more fully, x

Hi @needastrongone any news on your friend? What a horrible shock. Yes as we age everything we did to our bodies seems to come back to haunt us. Once my liver enzymes started rising and continued throughout last year, I knew I had to take action.
Keeping my fingers crossed for you

@needastrongone oh how awful for your friends, what a scary time , I hope that things look a bit more positive today xx
don't think any of us ever think it's going to happen to us and then something scary happens and we are shocked into doing something x

Evening all, so sorry to hear about your friend @needastrongone that’s a terrible shock. Unfortunately ill health creeps up on you when you live hard and fast - something I’m very conscious of as the years pass by! You never think it’s going to happen to you .. until it does. This is why what we are all doing is so important, recognising that our drinking is not healthy and doing something about it is a massive step towards being better. With two teenagers to care for it’s my biggest priority, the vicious circle of alcohol was sucking me into a place that was not safe. I’m just back from my afternoon dinner party. I drank coke and nothing else - champagne following and I resisted well. 😇 delighted to be going to bed sober this evening and not feeling regrets tomorrow morning!

After my blip a couple of weeks ago I am back on track and committed to making healthier choices... which is why I am horrified to find that I have developed a sweet tooth which I never had before.
Apparently it's really common to replace one bad habit with another and I just read something online that made me cry
It was never about the poison. It was always about the pain.
Ain't that the truth.
Now what....