Support thread for anyone trying to lead an Alcohol free life - Winter 25

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!
This thread is for anyone who is trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.

There’s no judgment here – just encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.

Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.

The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation or a break, there are a couple of really good threads on this board that will be a better fit. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on.

Living alcohol-free isn’t always easy in today’s world, but it is absolutely worth it. And you don’t have to do it alone – we’re here to help each other realise just how good AF life can be.

Morning!! I had a really calm sober weekend, went for a good run and felt amazing, in a good place ATM ❤️ fingers crossed it lasts! ATM it's fairly easy as we are doing Christmas at home just us so no real challenges. Very busy exploring all the AF options and enjoying new drinks!

How's everyone else doing?

All good here, out with friends last night. I drove. Had a super lovely evening, and was happy with my mocktail.

I have non alcoholic aperol, gin and Tripp drinks for xmas day. Thinking I might get a bottle of mother root in too.
i am not worried about it now.

off out to meet a pal for coffee and then a long dog walk.
have a great day everyone x

Just checking in. Had a really relaxing weekend, although was out until about 1:30am on Saturday picking up DP and friends, that seems to be a recurring theme, becoming a taxi service for friends and family now I no longer drink.

Yesterday was a lovely, chilled effort, coffees on the couch, a couple of AF beers from Aldi watching Christmas films.

Two days of work to go before breaking up, but really don’t have too much to do thankfully.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Monday.

Checking in, I pray I make it through this christmas sober. I am determined and now have another weekend under my belt. IWNDWYT 💜

Good morning all.

@Becky3825 really well done. You made it through the weekend sober. Fabulous, I'm proud of you.

I went food shopping. Four supermarkets. By number three i was flagging. However we got everything bar some books which the DH ordered on the evil website.
Marks do a brie like cheese from the Alps and its lovely. I'll look the name up later.
I bought quite a few mocktail cans for my nieces and low alchol stuff for the others. I refused to buy the turkey bauble as it was £50!
Doing nowt today but wrapping and cooking chilli.

Good morning Shipmates,

Made it through another weekend. Treated myself to some Christmas Stilton on Friday. I went to have some yesterday evening. An unknown member of our household appears to have stolen it, for 'tis nowhere to be found. Sid would not meet my eye when I mentioned it. I hope his conscience is pricking him. Little git.

I hate this time of year in the supermarkets - people go nuts overbuying stuff that nobody likes nor wants. One of my colleagues volunteers for the local food bank. He says that last year our tiny M&S supermarket had 100 turkey crowns unsold after Christmas. None of them could be taken as donations by the food bank because of the sell by dates and the need to keep them all refrigerated, so they all went into landfill. Sid would take them I'm sure, but after his shenanigans with the Stilton I'm not minded to fuel further gluttony.

Strength and courage my friends. It will be alright. x

Morning everyone, it’s a beautiful sunny morning here and I’m slowly starting to feel better. Got through the weekend unscathed although I did had a near miss - of which I’m proud to have swerved. There’s a big tractor run through our village every year which is quite an event and most folk head to the pub to stand out and watch it. I headed down with DS and his GF and the whole way down had a massive internal battle about whether to have a ‘normal’ pint or AF alternative. This went right up to the point that the barman was taking our orders. Right at the last minute something clicked in my head.
It went something like this…

“What a waste of time - all this emotional wrangling when I should be present and just enjoying the company and atmosphere. This is what alcohol does to me and if I order a beer now I’ll spend the whole evening and the best part of tomorrow half present and distracted.”

I had the AF beer 🥰😊

Top stuff @WhatMaggieDid - I quite like AF beer. x

Jesus I'm depressed. Thought about having a 'pint' all day. Didn't so this is a win. I just want this year over with. In my pyjamas listening to radio 4 currently. RIP Chris Rea 💔

Well done Becky!

I'm also in PJs :-) House is such a mess... I am out of bandwidth and just want to slob.

Checking in shipmates! Day 29 how exciting.
@Lavrander im 2 episodes into the Jack the Ripper podcast. It’s really very good although perhaps not very festive but I’m thoroughly enjoying it.
Yay @Becky3825 youre an absolute legend!
and yay to you @WhatMaggieDid -ita so easy to slip isn’t it? It requires a lot of assertive planning. I’ve struggled a bit with moments where I’ve thought I could just have one day over Xmas. So I have read my notes I wrote to myself when feeling hideous, anxious and regretful which seems to be motivating me thus far.
I am also in my pyjamas but they are rather fancy! I think I look like Liberace in them. Not sure if that’s a good thing but I like them. They are velvety with gold trim 😂

Well done @WhatMaggieDid , you chose freedom! You must feel amazing right now!

And well done @Becky3825 , sorry you're feeling depressed, I hope tomorrow is brighter for you ❤️

Lol Sid, my dogs totally would steal all the cheese too but then we'd know about it when they had the runs all over the landing 🤢🤦🤣

Morning! We had a day out in london. Previously that would have involved drinks at lunch, probably a stop off mid afternoon. As much as I could fit in at dinner. Maybe some cans for the train home. Wine when I got back. I would have been more focused on getting the drinks in during the afternoon rather than seeing the sites and the kids would have been dragged round various pubs (or at least mulled wine stallls).

Instead we had a great day with a museum, the london eye, lots of walking and xmas lights. I was 100% present and wasnt worried about where my next drink wss coming from. Knackered now after nearly 40k steps but at least I am clear headed and no hangover tomorrow! Plus saved a fortune. Probably would have spent £150 just on booze on a day like today 😵

A newbie here!

I have always been a heavy drinker, from a family of drinkers.

What was a bad habit has, over the last month, becoming a really bad habit with my units per week sky rocketing.

It needs to stop and I need to drastically cut back/quit.

im hoping this thread will help keep me accountable and give some support too - I feel so unbelievably embarrassed and ashamed that I’ve got to this point.

Hi @Changling1 , welcome! You don't need to feel embarrassed and ashamed, alcohol is an addictive beast that takes many of us down - it is in the nature of the drug to be addictive. You're making a really positive step forwards now. Be kind to yourself, we've all been there xx

Checking in, day 155 today. Last day of work for the year (I’ll probably be on between Christmas and NY, but just from home), got to get a few key bits of analysis done and out, but hoping it will be a fairly quiet affair.

I’m looking forward to a Christmas without chaos this year. Normally always end up mortal drunk and ruin the day for myself. Will be nice and settled waking up on Boxing Day with no beer fear.

One of the biggest things I have noticed after five months is the money I’ve saved. I was spending hundreds and hundreds of pounds a month on booze, I’ve never felt more flush with cash.

Nice one @HorrorFan81 ! Thank you for sharing, it's wonderful to hear how the booze noise can be silenced! Glad you had a lovely day ❤️

Morning everyone. I have to go do a 'christmas shop' at sainburies in a bit, god help me. But a privilege to be able to actually go for sure. Thank god for school food vouchers!. Anyway plan to gym later when I'm back so I am tired out for bed, and will also be feeling positive and healthy to not bugger it up. Skint anyway so that helps!

If I cam get through today I know I'll be fine tomorrow as never ever want to wake up hungover christmas day with the 4 kids, plus I'm doing all the cooking and everything generally so definitely no temptation to feel like death warmed up and mentally unstable christmas day

Well any MORE mentally unstable then normal 😅

@Becky3825 not having to parent whilst hungover is one of the best things about being sober!!

Day 60 here

disrutped sleep with a hellish drunk dream
very glad to be awake and sober
ordered myself a bottle of mother root as a reward to myself for day 60.
one day at a time

Morning my sober sisters.

Terrible night so I'm slobbing in bed.
Ive been reading the 'mad shopper requests'. I love them all. For all my years in retail id be there like a shot tomorrow. It was such fun.

Not much wrapping to do as I've given up stockings. Most DC gifts are clothes.
I'll get books as usual.
I have the Mother Root and the Gordon's AF. I'm mainlining milk at the moment.

Watch tv and eat chocolate (cheese, I'm with Sid) is my advice.

Morning shipmates. Last day of work before heading towards DB's house for Chrimble. Not much doing but good to be up and about.

Well done for not caving @Becky3825 ❤️

Welcome @Changling1 - glad you've found us. Lovely folk here - this space keeps me going. I'm with you on the shame but, really, the shame lies in knowing there's a problem and not doing anything about it. You've taken the brave, brave step of self-awareness and deciding to confront the issue. No shame in that.

Apologies if I missed it - are we doing a timed group raising of an AF glass to us all on C-Day? Up for it if anyone else is. Sid might consent to be wrestled into his Santa hat...

Strength and courage, brave friends. We're going to be alright. x

Welcome @Changling1. Every one of us has been where you are now no matter how many hours, days, weeks, months along. Cutting back isn't an option - lots of experience but also science says moderation doesn't work - not meaning to scare you but you'll end up up back where you started - it's just brain chemistry. Far better just to stop and it will be easier in the long run even if it doesn't feel that way now.

6pm on Christmas Day for the Toast?

6pm would be great @Lavrander. Thank you.

I actually find it easier not to drink at Christmas (ironically) - because I need to be in the present and sober around family. If I was on my own I think I'd struggle. But I stay true for Sid. x