Continuing support thread for those trying to live an alcohol free life - summer 2025

[Onewildandpreciouslife]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.

The original thread was started by @drybird in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.

Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.

All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain completely . If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there if that is your aim. That doesn’t mean that none of us has ever slipped, or that you can’t post here if you do - all we ask is that you are genuinely trying to stop drinking alcohol completely.

It’s not easy to be sober, but it is so, so worth it. Your alcohol-free life can be better than you ever dreamed. Come on in.

Good morning shipmates. Still here and still sane.

Sorry about the RA and the legal stuff @WendyWagon both desperately unfair and you deserve neither. Keep powering on. It will be alright. ❤️

I like your idea of Euromillions Towers @ShyMaryEllen - Sid says he'd be happy to handle the security arrangements (but only if he's allowed to wear a pink hi-viz tabard with "security" printed on it (though not sure how much of a deterrent to wrong 'uns that would be in practice)). We would, of course, employ a Bogdan in his vest - just don't ask him to dig up the cemetery 😉

Strength and courage my friends. Every single step is one step less on the road to our better sober futures. xx

This is interesting on agency and volition: From bank robber to scholar: the Knoxville dropout fighting to change how we see addiction | Drugs | The Guardian

Editing to add: my hunch (which of course might be wrong) is that we very often have more agency and ability to change than assumed by folk wisdom and non-specialist medical wisdom...

I grew up fearing I might be predestined to bad habits because of my 'genes'. I was wrong, so just wondered whether others had this too - the secret fear which actually made things worse.

225 days and counting - I've just added five to Try Dry, because I don't need to check in with it every day now!

Thanks for the link @tayloreanI'll take a look. It might not be related in the article but I often would use the phrase 'I have an addictive personality' as a reason for why I could never moderate my drinking, often as a joke after a heavy night. But one of the things I've learnt is that it's the substance that's addictive. What we can do is work to break the addiction but it's not our personalities that are at fault. We're just further along the dependency journey than others because we've drank more!
I think it's also because you do see in run in families - but then just as equally we see on here how sons and daughters don't drink! So perhaps again it's just that thing we tell ourselves to absolve control.

Sorry to hear about the house falling through - what a nightmare.
Congratulations on day 1 @Healthynow. Get yourself some AF drinks ready for the relative visit. She sounds a charmer and I can imagine it's tempting to just 'join' rather than 'beat'em' but you definitely will feel better for not!

I am not going to drink tonight. I am strong and will not

Posting for accountability

12 hours it'll be nearly time to wake up and then I can start the day NOT hungover and ready to attemd my in person SMART meeting in the afternoon.

Hang in there @Becky37 - you can do this.

Yes @Lavrander - I somehow haven't got addicted to doing the laundry. We only have challenges with the moreish stuff.

@Onewildandpreciouslife

Thank you for the support. I havnt drank and I was in a bar with a friend for nearly 2 hours! Had a soda and an earl grey. Would never have exposed myself his early in the game but we were meeting last minute to discuss a friend we were concerned about so had to be done.

Still sober. Still taking the time to perfect the beats. Still got love for the streets 😉

Clearly also gone slightly insane but I survived being surrounded by alcohol and am in bed. Mentally scrambled but sober as a judge.

Hang on in there, @Becky37. You're right that waking up with no hangover and no regrets will make it all worth it.

Glad you still got love for the streets, @Becky37 !😄

In bed sober, just watched Some Like It Hot... what a film! Noticed that, when Sugar is happy, she doesn't need the bourbon any more... 🤔

Morning all.
Huge win @Becky37 😁

Have a good Friday everyone

Morning 😊

Looking forward to a busy day and an early night tucked in the safety of my home this evening.

I feel a lot less 'love for the streets' this morning as didn't sleep very well. I will not let a Friday beat me though and am determined and fully focussed on sobriety today and of course SMART at 2-15 will be a great reminder and keep me on that straight and narrow!

Checking in for accountability
DAY 10 and Friday always a hard one. I’ve bought every AF drink I think going but Friday is still hard !
10 days AF

@mumzof4x 10 days - well done! And well done for checking in. Accountability is a huge incentive for me. Without it, I'm sure I'd have slipped up by now and be back on the 4 or 5 bottles of wine each week. It's Day 127 for me. I'm amazed and just wish I'd done it sooner. Hope your Friday goes well.

Crawling to the weekend - so so tired!!!

Love to all. Keep eating the elephant xxx

Morning all.
Terrible night. Very painful arms and legs.

When I was drinking I started to get numb legs. It was one of the things that shocked me.

I'm off to the farmhouse with the BFF. I need to check the access road to the new estate.

@WendyWagon
Sorry you had a bad night, hope today goes well and we can both hopfully tuck up early anf rest for a sober and positive weekend ahead 💜

Good morning shipmates. Sunny here on our last Dartmoor day (supreme irony). Belted down yesterday, several times. Twice I decided to kneel down against a grassy bank, crouch over Sid and shelter us both by making an impromptu "tent" with my too-big waterproof coat. Not done that before - I think it made quite an impression with Sid, now he has forgotten that he was p~ss~d off at the weather. Here he is this morning, mimicking his "human smile" (only done this twice before in all his years) when I woke him up this morning.

Much, MUCH kudos from us both to @Becky37 for keeping sober and staying true. That took immense courage, inner strength, and cannot have been easy. Without meaning to be patronising - we're proud of you. All power to you. Hope SMART goes OK this afternoon. Rejoice in your win with the group, you have earned it. I cannot speak highly enough of SMART - it was a big part of the saving of me.

Strength and courage to you, our lovely shipmates, as we heard into the weekend. We've got this. It's going to be alright. xx

Day 8. Bit of sunshine here after a very wet weak in the Welsh hills. Yes, Friday is always an extra challenge. Back to civilisation and it's endless temptations tomorrow. I love nothing better than a night out on the streets @Becky37 having a few drinks and maybe some grub. Can I enjoy that without the booze - or has it always been all about the booze? We shall see.

Morning all.
Well done @Becky37I am finding you quite inspiring. IWNDWYT
@mumzof4x@tayloreanstay strong. Fridays are tough for me too. I still can't quite get over Saturday not being a write off. The wonder of it is one of the things that keeps me going. Amazed indeed @LillyPJ!
We have visitors this evening who will definitely be on the booze. I have a few different options and also have already said I'm meeting a friend early morning so that will be an excuse for me. It is nerve wracking though as that's definitely been our 'thing' for years. However I also should remind myself of all the embarrassing moments I've had with them that I wish hadn't happened. Drink related. I have no interest in a repeat of those things.
Sorry you've had a bad night @WendyWagon- haven't heard of numb legs but it does show what a poison it is. Hope the farmhouse visit goes well.
I haven't watched that film in so long @CuddlesKovinsky. That part must have completely passed me by!

@aterriblefishI have done two nights out since quitting and my experience is that it is different without the booze. As long as the company is good then you have a good time. The difference though is your stamina and your interest. Booze does make you more tolerant of uninteresting things (I think it says in Alcohol explained that it makes you stupid which is probably about right) so if the bar and company isn't great then it's worse without the drink. It is hard though - I don't think I have much interest in it any more but am finding that focusing on friendships and trying to find love for other stuff (work in progress ) is helping me be more content.

@REP22I think Sid would look perfect in a beret. He has that je ne sais quoi.

@Becky37 thanks for the encouragement re AA, it's good to know you're finding it of value. I've never really admitted the extent of my problem to myself, let alone anyone else!
Finding the early evenings tough and sleeping badly, but it's early days. Have a good day all x

Ah @Lavrander -sad but true once on the booze it hardly matters who you're drinking with. It will be a major shift in lifestyle for sure - and I am not at all young - most people my age have naturally slowed down on the nights out. I think I find evenings very boring. I get restless and agitated and grumpy. Not that I don't have plenty to do - even hobbies that I supposedly enjoy. But I crave to be out. Hmmm.