The support thread for anyone trying to live an alcohol free life. Spring 2025.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome.
These threads were started by drybird in 2020 and have gone on to support many people to give up alcohol and live a sober life.
We are not a moderarion thread and only encourage sobriety. There is another long running thread if that's what you feel is right for you. Lots of support there.
We have newbies and veterans, some who have 5+ years under their belts.
We share life's up and downs (often why we drank) and no question is too silly.
Personally I gave up drinking three years ago. It's the hardest thing I've done and the best thing.
We call our selves sober sisters and even have a mascot, Sid the ship's dog.
He poses often for a cheer up picture.
We're not here to judge, just offer support and friendship.
It gets better I promise.

Good morning shipmates, hope your day is going well.

@Notdoingthisanymore that's so lovely, doing your garden with your 5 year old neighbour, I bet he loved that. A future Monty Don...! 🌺

Sid has had a busy weekend. Yesterday he and I were fortunate enough to meet the fabulous and gorgeous @WendyWagon - Sid was deeply honoured (me too); it was a lovely time.

Today he has had to make a local PR appearance. Dressed as some watercress. No parking, so we went there and back on the bus (dressed as some watercress). Stayed for 40 minutes or so, to do what we had to do, and then I called it a day (getting too warm and Sid was reaching his limit, what with all the posing, dressed as some watercress). He did very well; I was very proud of him. Less proud last night when he disappeared after a deer, but he had the good grace to return, wheezing and giggling, when I called him.

Judge for yourself from his happy, laughing face how thrilled he was to be dressed as some watercress,,,

Strength and courage my friends. Keep going for just a little bit longer. It will be alright. x

👋🏻

Just checking in. Very busy. Dog smashed his wrist and has had to have major surgery now on strict cage rest for 8 weeks! Very difficult.

@EastCoastDamsel Oh no! I'm so sorry. How upsetting for you and the dog. I hope the recovery is swift and complete, without too much hassle.

A condom (unused, obviously) can be very useful for keeping bandages waterproof and a barrier against licking, if your dog's snout can reach the dressing. Possibly not when out and about though.

Solidarity and all good wishes to you. x💐

Sid's joy just radiates off the screen there... 😄 I'm just enchanted to learn, in this sometimes serious and challenging world, that someone said 'What do we need to complete this event?' and the answer was: 'A dog dressed as watercress.'

But I hope EastCoastDog makes a fast and complete recovery! Poor wee soul! ❤️

Hope your day goes well @LillyPJ . I agree, the booze is damn well everywhere - Saturday and Sunday morning telly, Eurovision and even up a mountain... I was working up on the roof yesterday and having an 'I deserve a treat, wah wah' moment, but thought it through and promised myself a sit down with a Crodino (love that stuff) and crisps when I'd done, and this was sufficient unto the day...

...and to the night too - watched Eurovision to the happy end, but with good food and clean jammies, I was content... slept better and woke fresher than if I'd drank. Thus I win!

Checking in for inspiration! It’s cooking time and I’ve been digging and housework all day so am using you guys as a prop. You have refreshed my resolve with your tales of good nights sleep and avoiding Eurovision. Luckily there’s nothing in the house and you’ve inspired me to dig out the lids deluxe cheese crisps. So crunchy! And an orange juice.
love to all, and porrlydoggies. Ouch

You know I do think Sid in this picture looks like he is saying 'for God' s sake woman'. Made me laugh.

I did it! Another night, Thank you!🌸🌸🌸
IWNDWYT

Day 17 wasn't nice. The mountains were beautiful but the 'lunch and beer' event didn't go well for me. It was hard watching the jugs of beer doing the rounds while I sipped my water, and painful listening to the raucous table behind me. I felt overwhelmed and in the end had to leave and sit alone for a while. I don't think I handled it well - but on the upside, I didn't drink so I guess it counts as success. Tomorrow should be better.

So sorry to hear about your dog @EastCoastDamsel - I swear having a poorly dog is harder than a sick child

I’m sorry today was tough @LillyPJ , but when you get into bed tonight you will know you have passed a huge test. I hope you feel quietly proud of yourself

Yay @Healthynow !

I know I may we a grumpy old woman but I was shocked by the lyrics to the UK’s Eurovision entry - celebrating the joys of being black out drunk. We really don’t stand a chance, do we?

OMG well done lillyPJ that is IMMENSE. Going off and sitting on your own for a while sounds to me, like handling it extremely well. Also the raucous table? Raucous because they were high on ethanol (also used to clean factories). If that was at lunch, by early evening they’ll be sleepy and by now, hungover . You did BRILLIANTLY 💪😁👍

Thank @Healthynow and @Onewildandpreciouslife . I am quietly proud, I guess. And I'll certainly be a lot happier tomorrow than I would have been if I'd caved in. At least I'll be prepared if a similar day is planned later on and I'll put plans in place to avoid an awkward situation.

onewildandpreciouslife agreed! My son is a teen and people (adults) are now saying, ‘just a beer’ ‘you need to know how to drink’ ffs. And of course the try hard mates are turning up with vodka. I’m very tempted to give him one of the books which explain how crap it is. I mean we are supposed to educate them on the dangers of drugs right?
It was all ladettes and lad culture when I was a young lady. Blair got in, booze was suddenly cheaper than soft drinks and you could buy it in a supermarket. No wonder we are all hooked, you are right.

Oh good lillyPJ be loudly proud! And tomorrow be SUPER proud. You are an inspiration 💐

Morning my wonderful sober friends on this challenging voyage.
I will not drink today.

I remind myself not to get so fixated with where I want to be ,at the expense of not appreciating where I am today. I've worked so had to come so far. It's a work in progress.

Sending lifeboats to any that need them.
Stay safe and sober.

Ahoy my lovelies.
Well done @LillyPJ, holidays are a challenge.

Mrr Tiggle and I have been up a few times. He's been barking a lot lately. We have a couple of new young families on the development and perhaps they go to work early?

It's my lazy day today. I usually try that on Fridays but I was out tea drinking. I have felt alot better this past week.

So the DH shocked me by saying he likes the cottage alot. Very expensive and not very big but it has no work really.
I thought he may be thinking chi chi, but no. The cottage I'm seeing tomorrow he thinks will be a money pit and we don't need the barns. They're the same price. Thoughts lladies?

Another morning sobershipmates!
Oh gosh Wendy, I’d have no idea. But it IS exciting! Enjoy!
lillipjit’s inspiring to think of you battling through and waking up hangover free. You helped me get through last night, fwiw. Thanks!
mermaidincirnwallyour post is very helpful, as always. A pause for thought. And intriguing! I’m now curious as to where you want to be , and well done in how hard you’ve worked - and getting where you’ve got. I think we all know how hard it can be, this old life thing.
Working pretty hard myself too tbh. Being sober helps a lot! Well done us 💐💐💐💐💐💐
IWNDWYT.

I'm definitely happier and healthier @WendyWagon, but I know I would be more when I loose some of this excess weight, it's literally weighing me down. It's another work in progress.
@Healthynow I found in the early weeks my emotions were all over the place, they'd come in waves and hit me hard. Remembering that this is normal helped. Alcohol had numbed them for so long. As for your father in law...People not make conversation can be a annoying. I've found if you spark some memories,especially their earlier years,they often won't stop talking, try asking things like..what they had for school dinners, who taught them to ride a bike/drive a car, did their mum make them birthday cakes. Honestly it really does work, absolutely game charger for making conversations.

Love sid the watercress, I cannot for the life of me think what for?

Hope you're dog is doing well
@EastCoastDamsel.

Welcome @CuddlesKovinsky, I knew ' limp mode ' way too well. Not anymore I'm proud to say,😁

Morning all.

I saw a post from the author of Very British Problems on FB this morning, saying he was 4 years sober, and one of the comments summarised his journey as

”had demons, fought demons, won”

I rather liked that

Morning all. All is good, love sobriety- I’m
an all round better human.

@WendyWagon which cottage is your preferred option? Are you buying as an investment or a forever home? If overpriced have you submitted an offer? Again, if overpriced that it would come out in the valuation prompting a subsequent discussion.

@Kindtomyself
I'm seeing cottage number two tomorrow. Both have downstairs bedrooms with ensuites (planning for the future).

The original cottage is thatched which I love. This would be my fourth thatch. It's just quite small vis a vis our current home but the DS has found a house at last. We will only need enough room for the DD and us. My granddad's farm was part thatched and I loved it. They both have fires and Agas. Wendy essentials.
The other new to the market cottage has barns for conversion into additional properties. I'm not sure I can be arsed.

I do like a project though!! 😄

Morning. No drinking for me today!!
@REP22 I have the loveliest neighbours and a bit of a communal garden so I get to steal the kids for digging and weeding..😂
@WendyWagon Your cottage sounds lovely!! I have just bought an old Coastguards cottage by the sea...tiny and loads of renovation needed but aren't they worth it!! : )

@mermadeincornwall I need to loose some weight too so your not alone : ) The amount of calories I used to drink is shocking to think of. I'm hoping that not drinking and not wallowing in bed with a hangover will tip the balance for my weight loss.

I’m really struggling at the moment. I have used alcohol for far too long to numb a lot of pain

Hi @Sortoutyourshit I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. We get it.

It can be hard to know whether to start with the causes of the pain or the alcohol- are you getting support for either of them in real life?

Welcome dortoutyourshit I’m sorry you’re feeling struggling. Like everyone here, I’ve done/ doing that too. For years and years, not realising what the problem was- it wasn’t actually booze,tho it became a problem , it was the symptom of other stuff.
If it helps my counselor didn’t seem so bothered by the drinking - she gave me tips and plans to cut down but the focus was on the surrounding issues. She said they all affect each other. I liked this approach as it wasn’t all focussed on Not Drinking. Which would have made me feel rubbish when I folded which I did. I’ve been going for a lot longer than the 6 weeks offered by basis the local charity, and to me the cost has been a worthwhile investment- if I don’t have mental heath my savings aren’t going to help.
just saying as a counsellor might help you with your struggling.
massive hugs, it will get better - especially now you’ve found these guys ♥️