The support thread for anyone trying to live an alcohol free life. Spring 2025.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome.
These threads were started by drybird in 2020 and have gone on to support many people to give up alcohol and live a sober life.
We are not a moderarion thread and only encourage sobriety. There is another long running thread if that's what you feel is right for you. Lots of support there.
We have newbies and veterans, some who have 5+ years under their belts.
We share life's up and downs (often why we drank) and no question is too silly.
Personally I gave up drinking three years ago. It's the hardest thing I've done and the best thing.
We call our selves sober sisters and even have a mascot, Sid the ship's dog.
He poses often for a cheer up picture.
We're not here to judge, just offer support and friendship.
It gets better I promise.

Morning all
fell off thread
did have a wobble involving a funeral
back on it
day 5
@REP22 sorry re nightmares. Do you know what is causing them. Sometimes I can see why I dreamt certain things. But then again I dreamt of being chased by a crocodile last night so clearly my theory isn’t fool proof
🐊🐊🐊
have a good day all

Morning my wonderful hearties.
I will not drink today.

Any cravings for alc are not because I stopped drinking,but because I started in the first place.
And because I drank far too much far too often.

Sending peace and the will to cary on.
Throw love at yourself today.

Morning all. I am sitting in the garden with a tea. So nice not to feel fuzzy headed. Also. wine gives me a dicky tummy the day after sometimes, so there is that too.

@REP22 the BBC sound app has something called The Sleeping Forecast which I find helpful. Sorry about the nightmares. I get some corkers sometimes and have to have the light on for the rest of the night.

Hope the dentist was OK @northerndancer

Good garden plans @WendyWagon Bay trees are lovely, plus saves spending money on the leaves!

I'm sending a lot of love at the moment. I have a couple of people around me with the big C, one only 34.

We have to keep going shipmates and then at least we can say we tried.

Don't be silent, be sassy, be sober.

Good morning shipmates, we've made it to Wednesday 🙂

Thanks for the sympathy @Sortoutyourshit - I wish I knew why I get plagued with nightmares. Bad memories I suppose. It used to be a large part of why I drank, to try and 'switch them off'. But it doesn't help. Sorry about the crocodiles - though they're good for a couple of handbags and some shoes if you catch them I suppose, and apparently can be subdued with nothing more than an elastic band and paper bag (or Paul Hogan in a swarthy hat). Thanks for the tip about The Sleeping Forecast @TheTwoTinas - I am going to give that a try I think, I hadn't heard of that before. I usually have Saturday Kitchen or similar on permanent loop on the BBC iPlayer during the night to keep me distracted, but sometimes the wine 'n' cocktails banter can be a bit - er - unhelpful.

With love to you @WendyWagon . Always keep trying. I promise I will too.

Sid believes in us. Here he is, believing in us all.

Strength and courage. x

Good afternoon.

The dentist was fine thanks. I came home and went to bed and feel almost back to normal today. Even enjoyed my lunch of lukewarm soup!

Day 5 and the dentist says I should not drink until tomorrow anyway. I will not drink today.

Interestingly, my resting heart rate has already dropped significantly. It's now in the 60s. Not bad for an old 'un!

Hiya all, been sober for six months. Do I feel better? Yes, mentally I’m calmer and less stressed. Physically, still have periods of disturbed sleep, so I empathise @REP22 , have had the weirdest and wildest disturbing nightmares that I’ve woken up from shaking and crying. This could be late withdrawal or because I’ve had a lot of life changes within the last three years…lost both parents, switched from teaching to being a doggie walker, and over Easter split from long term partner. We’re still good friends,mutual decision, but obviously it’s had an impact. But, and this is huge, I’m coping. Without booze. Life can be hard and cruel, but personally I know that comfort doesn’t come in a bottle.

Stay safe and sober you lovely strong people. X

That's a hell of a lot to go through, @Middlemarch123. You're absolutely right that it's good to have done it sober, as your decisions will be much more rational - but we all know it will have been hard. Well done for staying strong.

I'll have a look at the Sleeping Forecast too, @TheTwoTinas , thanks. My sleeping has been rubbish for a while, although I'm sleeping a bit better here in the Lakes.

Look at lovely Sid, @REP22. He's a handsome chap, isn't he?

Sorry to hear you have so much illness around you @WendyWagon. Fingers crossed for good outcomes all round.

Thank you @ShyMaryEllen , you look after yourself.
Yes, Sid is gorgeous. Very handsome boy indeed. X

Morning beautiful sober sisters.
I will not drink today.

I want to dance through this life not waste it.

Sending an uplift to all that need it.
It'll be alright.

Morning all.

@mermadeincornwall i love the thought of dancing through life.
My first ambition was to be a ballet dancer. I grew too tall.

I am thinking of applying to a famous feminist college to do an MA in creative writing. I see my second career as a Agatha Christie type. I have a couple of half finished novels on the computer. I could wear tweed and eat 'high tea'!

However I am committed to a big sort out today of our dressing room. My home help is coming to fold piles of linen and put out of season togs into storage bags. I can't lift the skin off a milk pudding.

Have a peaceful day my friends.

@WendyWagon my dad always thought the skin was the best bit! Be strong x
Day 156 here. Went to my brother’s 50th last night and took my own favourite CBD drink . It was so liberating to actually really really not be bothered about having the champagne. I poured dh plenty, as the poor chap is being so supportive he hardly drinks himself now and definitely doesn’t have a problem.
Anyways onwards we all go holding hands of sobriety and staying strong.
Today I am grateful for the help and support we are now getting for dd with her mental health, my sobriety and my clear skin !

Good morning, Day 6 here. Resting heart rate has dropped again overnight.

Mouth is no longer sore and I am off to the RSC to see "Much Ado About Nothing". I have read the synopsis online and am convinced I will be completely unable to follow it, but I am going with people I don't know that well, so will be too embarrassed to ask questions.

What to drink though? Heineken zero gives me heartburn, AF Rekorderlig is like drinking bubble gum and ginger ale is also too sweet. Any suggestions?

I will not drink today

M&S do a good alcohol free cider as does Sainsbury's. Gordon's 0% g&ts in a tin are quite good. Have yet to find a decent wine and suspect it does not exist.

Sorry, I think you meant a drink for when you are out?

Tonic water, sparkling water or cranberry juice are my “go to” in those situations @NorthernDancer . One theatre I went to recently had an AF sparkling wine which was a lovely surprise.

Not drinking at the theatre is one of those surprising revelations- being able to concentrate as well after the interval as before, and not having the same urgency to get to the loos, are lovely. Also, make sure you get an ice cream in the interval - you deserve it!!

I actually think the Bolle sparkling blanc de blancs is pretty good. It's been a long time since I drank champagne but my sister had both at Christmas and said she actually thought it was pretty similar.

Don’t know if it helps but when out I now favour lime soda if there’s no af lager.the sugar can actually make a gal quite giggly.
if that’s too sweet ( it’s best with real lime) sparkling water is actually ok. Maybe with a bit of tonic. But it is a dilemma, everything is so sweet.
Also sorry to hear you are surrounded by such illness wendywagon here’s to love and joy for everyone especially people who are ill. It sucks.
IWNDWYT.

Good afternoon shipmates,

Up on deck late today as work started early. Sorry you're beset by the mares of the night as well @Middlemarch123 and @ShyMaryEllen sending solidarity and strength. I woke up from a grim one at 2am this morning (also, coincidentally, a hellish carnival of various jobs I have had to date and the worst aspects of them all) to find that Sid had wrested my Peter Rabbit teddy from my side and was muttering filth into his unheeding floppy ears.

Congratulations on getting through the birthday party unscathed @mumzof4x top result.

Hope you enjoy Much Ado About Nothing @NorthernDancer - it's a jolly romp and not too hard to follow. Main couple (Beatrice & Benedick) who really hate each other actually love each other, their friends "con" them into getting together, which does the trick. Other couple (Hero and Claudio) who love each other and are getting married - evil half-brother fools bloke into thinking girl was unfaithful so he breaks off wedding, girl pretends to be dead so as to convince bloke she was innocent. Evil-half brother gets comeuppance along with other assorted wrong 'uns. Various shenanigans surround, but that's the main plot. It's one of Shakespeare's better ones and not too heavy. 🎭 Ken 'n' Em did a film version back when they were together in the 1990s which is pretty good. Have fun 🙂

It's nice not to drink at the theatre as @Onewildandpreciouslife says. For the price alone. In London last year a mocktail was £17 (for one!). Grasping little Fagins. The bar staff should wear masks and little stripey jumpers. I was pleasantly surprised by the AF Peroni beer that I stumbled across recently. Very nice.

I've got a few half-finished works in the, er, works too @WendyWagon - nothing to the standard of Dame Agatha or your good self though, I fear. Hope the room sorting goes OK. Not sure about the skin off a milk pudding though - what shoes would go with that...? 🤔

Strength and courage. We're going to make it. xx

@REP22 great synopsis! @NorthernDancer it should be fun, it’s a comedy and the language is easy enough to follow if it’s well performed. You can’t get better than the RSC ;-)

I told my boss the other day that I don’t drink any more. We were just chatting over lunch and she said she’d been good at the weekend having had a boozy week beforehand. I’ve only told one other friend via text and this the first time I’ve actually said it out loud to someone. It felt fine! I couldn’t have don’t it before but I’m learning to live with it now. It feels like less of a burden now, more an achievement… like getting rid of a ball and chain.

Enjoy the production, I have taught Much Ado, have a look online for a synopsis if you’re worried, Spark Notes No Fear Shakespeare or just google for a synopsis. Just try to enjoy it, he wrote for the masses at the time, simple plots mostly, it’s the language of his time which is tricky. X

Just read further and Rep has summed up the play perfectly!

Ooh as a kid I saw Dustin Hoffman in the merchant of Venice. Wow! He made it seem like proper talking - not the showy intonation you’d expect from nonsense actors. It’ll be great!

I didn’t drink! Not even tempted! What’s going on?!

Morning wonderful ships company sailing on a voyage of discovery.
I will not drink today.

My morning affirmations are often easier said than done. However, like anything, the more you practice the easier it gets. Spending my day with positive thoughts that make me think has become so much easier.

Sending calmness and love to all.