On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining, no judging, keep on being strong, new thread autumn 2024

[Nowstrong]

@Amdone123, @Freezingfeetwarmheart , @Bigbus,@Flumpywoo , @FiveShelties , @ForeverTipsy, @Hohofortherobbers,@Jbob1976,@walliedug,

Wanted to post and old thread wouldn't let me, so took the plunge...
Please tag everyone, don't want to leave anyone behind.

Still AF here and even starting to enjoy it. Nearly 2 months. Will write proper post later..
Hope you are all doing well. Stay strong. Wet vibes, 'cos it's raining.

@alcoholfreelife sorry your GP wasn't particularly helpful. I've struggled with insomnia and the ensuing low mood/mood swings in the past and just been offered AD's. I tried them once for 6-8 weeks and they made my anxiety worse and I felt too numb (not good when you've got two young kids). I then found a better GP, and have low-dosage sleeping tablets to take when I'm going through a bad spell of insomnia (which is usually linked to stress). They're Zopiclone tablets, 3.75mg, which is enough to help me sleep but not knock me out completely. You cannot take them and drink alcohol, so that helped me cut back. I only take them for 2-3 nights in a row maybe twice a year, but that helps break the cycle.

One of the reasons I cut alcohol out was because it negatively affected my sleep in such an obvious way. I was already exhausted intermittently from family life/work/insomnia so I didn't want anything within my control to make it worse. Perhaps your sleep will start improving soon? And then the under-eye bags will clear (fingers crossed).

Sorry to hear your skin has broken out, too. I'd say that must be the toxins coming out? My skin is bad atm too, but that's my perimenopausal hormones (I have Zineryt lotion for cystic acne).

Here are some of the benefits we should be seeing after abstaining for a few weeks...! I guess we're all different?!

The whole package – How a month off alcohol benefits your mind and body | Alcohol Change UK

For @alcoholfreelife
Interesting watch. He explains quite well how it's bad before it gets good...

Hello all - It's been ages since I checked in.

It's been a bit up and down - I've had some backsliding weeks where I've had quite a bit of wine, but I no longer drink regularly and am mostly sober. To help with chronic joint pain (now I'd not deadening my responses with alcohol) I've been giving up a lot of my favourite food in a bid to lose weight, and every now and again I rebel against it all and have a wine and pizza week. Not ideal but not a catastrophe.

It's been over a year now since I kicked the very heavy drinking by a one week detox. Jeez, what a different life that seems. Life is so, so much better.

I don't feel in thrall to booze in the same way. I don't wake up with dread about what I've said or done the night before, and I'm much better company.

I like having a glass of red wine with a nice meal or some cheese every now and again, but I'm also not wanting more than that. I don't like how stupid alcohol makes me feel.

DH is still drinking very heavily, which is hard sometimes. I respect his right to make his choices and don't say anything. It was hard when I was still craving alcohol but other than a quick "ooo, yes, a glass of that would be nice" I move on and fix myself something nice but alcohol-free instead.

I'll read back what I'e missed on the thread over the next day or so, just thought I'd check in.

@Nowstrong that video is really great, thanks for sharing. I'm lucky that my sleep has generally been quite good - maybe partly because I'm doing a lot of exercise and physically tiring myself out - I don't know.

I have been having wicked vivid dreams some nights (last night for example) which I also remember from other times I gave up alcohol (same for cannabis, which I used heavily in a past life, never touch it now).

@HappyAsAGrig hi, I'm new. Been sober for 6 weeks, and going to keep going in an open minded and open-ended way.

Hi @BezMills , congratulations on 6 weeks!

Morning all! So some of my family has joined up with me on holiday, must admit us lovely to be together and doing fun things all together. Did have 1 beer yesterday evening and that was fine. Also had an awesome night's sleep. Would like to keep it at that. No more than 1 beer a day max. No wine but lots of coconuts and soda water.

It's really funny that I used to be a bottle of wine a day person (easily) and now I feel guilty over 1 beer a day.
Feel good and happy to have come such a long way on this moderating and/or abstaining journey.
Keep up the good work everyone ! Stay strong. Don't forget the love xxx

Nowstrong · sounds like a fabulous time, enjoy!
I've just watched the video, after lying awake for hours! It really resonates, as when I've attempted to quit before, the lack of sleep.kicks in! I'm determined to persevere this time and get through this patch 😴

Hello again everyone, I’ve been on and off these threads for a long time (was Bigbus but accidentally first posted on this thread with this user name and MN won’t let me post on the same thread with a different name).

I have been moderating quite well really and when I look back at what I used to drink without any thought it’s quite alarming! Last week was a bit crappy though - for one reason or another I drank every night and one night actually more than I meant to so this week has needed to be a bit of a reset - it’s mad how quickly you can start to think about the first drink of the day with just one week of nonsense! Anyway, managed Sun-Wed AF without difficulty and had a couple of drinks last night without going OTT. I’m really keen to moderate and these threads have helped me to do that and mostly it’s become normal for me without too much effort - it’s just holidays I struggle with. Anyway I hope it’s ok for me to catch up again with the thread.

best wishes to everyone

Morning all

day 40 here and things are going well!
@Swanchaser - the crap sleeping took about 2 weeks to settle down for me - now I sleep incredibly well and for the whole night!

@Nowstrong good to hear you’re moderating well and having a blast with family!
@BezMills good to see you hitting some big goals - I’m still ploughing on til I get to 100 days. Tbh I’m finding it pretty easy now and rarely think about alcohol.
DH hasn’t had a drink this week and seems very pleased with himself which is great! He will be drinking at weekends but I’m happy the balance has shifted!

hope we all have a successful weekend and enjoy waking with a clear head every morning …

Good morning everyone! Thanks for the link @Nowstrong , It was interesting to listen to so thank you

I drunk last night 🙄 I had an event last night, and months ago I had to pick my menu and drinks for this event and I chose wine, I had sort of forgotten what food and drink I had ordered and didn’t give it a second thought until I got to my table and the wine was there.

I have to admit I did drink both glasses but genuinely didn’t enjoy them at all, which is a big shift for me knowing how much I’ve drunk over the years, I don’t feel particularly guilty that I did drink as I think I said in a post that I’m not sure if I want to quit or cut back but I’m just shocked at how much I’ve actually gone off booze now, even though I have this stupid inner voice telling me to drink, the fantasy is definitely better than the reality for me, I’m hoping lasts nights drinks will be the beginning of the end of the voices as I really didn’t enjoy them so I need my brain to catch up now

So I suppose it’s day one again for me but I’m definitely feeling positive on my day one rather than a failure, drinking those glasses of wine opened my eyes that it’s definitely not something I enjoy anymore nor need so I suppose it was the start of closing that chapter of my life

I'm quite new so hi to the regulars who are new to me.

Ups and downs this week, seem to be having a couple of rough days every week recently! Staying off booze consistently is definitely in the win column, for me or anyone!

Off out tonight to a quiz night commemorating a friend who died of alcohol related illness in his early 40s. He was loved by so many people and we miss him terribly. I remember two years ago getting roaring drunk at his wake. This year I'll celebrate his life the sober way.

Keep on keeping on

Morning all

@BezMills hope your night out was ok and that you were sober remembering your friend…

day 46 here and still ploughing on! I’ve started going to a few evening yoga classes which I would never normally do (everything requires driving and I’d normally be drinking!) it feels like I have so much extra time for things now I’m not vegging out with a bottle of wine!

@alcoholfreelife i don’t know if it’s helpful to restart at day1 unless you’re absolutely insistent on being alcohol free - I am happy to have a planned drink once I feel sure I can stop at just one! I currently don’t think I could! In the future though counting af days in total could be more productive and remove that aspect of failure….

I'm doing OK thanks @Seenoevil33

59 days here, exactly two months in. Last week was a bit of a struggle but even an iffy week has a lot of good in it. I'm really enjoying the gym.
Like you, I'm appreciating extra time and options, from sobriety and the related better sleep.

Well a huge well done to you! 2 months is pretty brilliant.

I get occasional thoughts about a glass of wine but I don’t devote any energy to them. I can occasionally be very stubborn and I’m definitely aiming for 100 days.

DAY 50! Struggled over the weekend - kept thinking that I could just have a glass of wine - feeling really deprived ….
got through it and hoping for easier times this week - it’s so strange how these thoughts just pop into your head - I’d been doing really well but mainly I think cause I’m working towards a goal - but what will I do when I reach 100 days? My first thoughts are that i would have a glass of champagne to ‘celebrate’! Apparently I still associate alcohol with rewards ….
things to think on and work through - haven’t read any quitlit so maybe I could do that over the next 50 days.

hope you’re all doing well and af. Oh and I will not drink today.

@DrFroggy how are you getting on with moderation? My DH is trying that but still struggles with it (I think). He is going af 3-4 days a week but seems much harder than total abstinence - I don’t think he’s at the point yet where he sees drinking every day as an issue.

9 weeks today.

Struggling a bit with low mood, but not massively tempted to drink as a remedy.

Today I won't drink

Hey everyone, just read updates. Day 69/100 here. Will now be on holiday abroad somewhere warm and hopefully sunny for days 98, 99 and 100 (+ a few days) so am also wondering how I'll celebrate...does seem counter intuitive to do it with alcohol hey @Seenoevil33 🤣 I'm just going to see how I feel on the day. Keeping fingers crossed I'll have wine and pretty much spit it out and shout "yuk! Is that it?! Is that what I've been missing?!?".

I've found a local acquaintance who's ok day 72/100 and she's been struggling lately, too. Think the novelty has worn off, plus we've had some lovely sunshine in England and sun almost always = booze, esp on a Friday night.

Hope everyone is keeping well.

@alcoholfreelife how's your skin now? Mine is awful but is definitely due to my hormones.

Hi everyone, glad your all still replying, it's nice to have some support and great to share this up/down journey with people.

I'm doing ok, I went for a champagne breakfast last Saturday for my best friends birthday but I mixed the champagne with orange juice so had a Buck's Fizz instead of just champagne, I kinda viewed it as a shandy so didn't worry about it too much, it was a special birthday for a special friend and we all got champagne so I actually wanted to join in so a Buck's Fizz was my compromise, I really can't stand alcohol free fizz, I've tried several bottles and it's rank, 🤢

It was another friends birthday last weekend too and I went along, it was 12 of us in the local pub and two of us weren't drinking, it's really strange watching people slowly get drunk around you whilst your stone cold sober, I didn't really enjoy it once they all started getting drunk so I've decided not to go to pubs for the foreseeable future with that group of friends as it always ends up a drunken mess which isn't my thing anymore and I especially dislike it sober! 🤦‍♀️

My skin is still a mess,my husband helpful compared me to Freddie Kruger, he was only joking but I did have to agree 🫣😆

So all in all I'm doing ok, a mixed bag really, the voices are dying down in my head but I'm just drinking water, coffee or zero lager, I think I need to broaden my horizons a bit as I'm getting bored drinking the same three drinks, I have nothing to look forward to drink wise so I definitely need something special for a weekend!

Well done all of you on your achievements, your all doing amazing! I hope one day to be totally alcohol free but compared to where I was last year I’m so proud of myself!

Today is 10 weeks for me. I see this as a long term thing now.

I'm (cough)ty years old end of June and I think my birthday present to myself will be sobriety. Well, that and Lego. Definitely getting a big lego set.

This youtuber has put up some good videos about his sober journey, I found them thought provoking and encouraging.

keep on keeping on

@alcoholfreelife you are doing great and the amount you are drinking is certainly not problematic so enjoy being where you are right now! I find the cbd drinks are perfect so I don’t feel like I’m missing out - added benefit is that I sleep like a log ….

@BezMills 10 weeks is brilliant! I think that sound like the best birthday present you could get! I’m still toying with the idea of remaining sober long term. Was thinking this morning that life is just so much easier without alcohol! I can go where I want when I want, sleep well and feel ok every day.

8 weeks for me yesterday so just plodding on.

@ForeverTipsy its true the novelty has worn off but I do love being clear headed etc. hope you’re still doing well and not too long now til you get to 100 days!

Went for a curry at the weekend and drank water - didn’t mind it but I find it hard to recognize myself now - and I think everyone prefers the drinking seenoevil - I do feel a bit less fun so I get what you mean @alcoholfreelife about switching up our social lives to do different things. Booking in for a paint night but even that comes with wine….

@BezMills thanks for the YouTube clip - have watched a few mins but will watch/listen properly later. Congratulations on 10 weeks! We must be a similar-ish time, think mine is 11 weeks or so. 75 days today. Yes yes to a big Lego set for your special birthday! I'm a fan, too...do it!

I keep changing my mind about what will happen on day 100 and beyond. Most days I can't wait to have a glass of wine and get that buzz, relax and enjoy it. But I am SO aware now that it's SUCH a short-term gain for a longer term pain, namely, poor sleep and the risk of me drinking to excess every week again. And then the guilt. Maybe I'll try and do six months, who knows. Will be hard not to drink on holiday abroad in Easter as

I had a blood test last week and still waiting on results (checking everything as I'm Tired All The Time). Blood pressure was perfect tho, and weight not changed since 2019 apparently (weird, could have sworn I'm 5kgs heavier. Must be carrying it all in my middle these days). The GP was impressed I've given up alcohol this year. I said it was partly due to my low iron as know alcohol inhibits absorption.

@Seenoevil33 social occasions when everyone else is drinking are tricky. This is probably going to be the only time I do drink in the future. I definitely don't want to go back to drinking at home again.

SO want to join in this, I undoubtedly drink to much, myself and my husband have just drank our way through Paddy’s day long weekend, woken up today with terrible guilt 😔 so scared for my health, mid 40’s now and I have honestly been drinking heavily since the pandemic, I REALLY want to moderate, I do a lot of the time not drink during the week, so Monday night to Thursday night, but would love not to drink one weekend night too, at the moment Friday/Saturday/Sunday. 😬 though easily get into a night drinking mid week if there’s a dinner out or football match on tv (what a great excuse, eh?)

great idea to have this thread to be accountable in some way! Looking forward to hearing how everyone’s getting on and giving each other encouragement 💗