On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining, no judging, keep on being strong, new thread autumn 2024

[Nowstrong]

@Amdone123, @Freezingfeetwarmheart , @Bigbus,@Flumpywoo , @FiveShelties , @ForeverTipsy, @Hohofortherobbers,@Jbob1976,@walliedug,

Wanted to post and old thread wouldn't let me, so took the plunge...
Please tag everyone, don't want to leave anyone behind.

Still AF here and even starting to enjoy it. Nearly 2 months. Will write proper post later..
Hope you are all doing well. Stay strong. Wet vibes, 'cos it's raining.

I just read something that said "alcohol - the only drug you have to justify not taking" and thought, yeah, that does sound weird when you say it like that...

Right, finally on the laptop so can reply properly.

@mumzof4x some things you said really resonated with me; only craving for 60 seconds or so but then having the ability to reason that drinking alcohol is short term gain/long term pain, having anxiety dreams (I have them when going through a bad patch), and noticing that now we're not drinking in the afternoon/evening we are being much more PRESENT with our children. That is probably at the top of my reasons to quit. I would often be too sleepy to interact with them more, or a bit more snappy as just wanted them to go to bed and leave me in peace with my bottle of wine, or just be really distracted. They don't like being around me when I'm drinking (don't know any children who do like it to be fair?) and are old enough to go an look after themselves at home (11 and 14), but my sober evenings can now be spent chatting properly with them, playing cards, watching TV and being properly present etc.

It will be amazing if you can get to 1st December completely dry! And then 'enjoy' a glass of champagne whilst decorating the tree. I put inverted commas as who knows if you'll actually enjoy it after a year off? Two months down for you, ten to go. You can do it! Oh, and your log cabin getaways sound incredible!

@BezMills I hope you can find a suitable alternative for your cook's wine! And we will both be sober in February so can support each other.

@Seenoevil33 how was yoga? Well done on your 12 days streak AND with a house FULL of alcohol?! I've got a bottle of red and bottle of fizz, and sometimes just hold them and stroke them 😂Sorry your DH isn't being supportive, it does drive a bit of a wedge, doesn't it? I've always found that too. DH did 30 days straight of Dry Jan then had a couple of beers when me and kids went to bed last night. He woke up with a headache and said he really regretted having them (they were bought as Christmas presents and had been in the fridge for past couple of weeks, so he'd done well). He's out tonight but will stick to 0% cider, so he's definitely changed (thanks to me; he was a fairly heavy drinker before we met, and still slides into very bad habits when he's stressed, like drinking a few beers or a couple of glasses of wine every single night for weeks).

Anyway, enough rambles. 31 Days Dry for me, 69 to go! Got through the hardest month and both kids' birthdays sober, so feeling galvanised for February...

Well done @ForeverTipsy good luck for Feb!

@ForeverTipsy I’m chuckling at the thought of you stroking bottles of alcohol….
soo glad January has finished too. Managed easily last night - had my watered down cbd drink (I mix it with sparkling water so it lasts all night). Was reading horrible stories about liver failure out of the blue so that’s put me off drinking for a while!

yoga was great - I’m not very flexible but find when I do 3-4 classes a week, I gain so much strength - plus it fills in time.

@BezMills I’m in for sober February- one day at a time.

DH has committed to 3 days af next week - I know I shouldn’t judge - he isn’t ready to stop yet (initially that wasn’t my intention either) so I just have to stop pushing my agenda onto him!

another snowy day here so can’t get to yoga - will have to jump on the treadmill then have more rugby to look forward to…

onward and upwards- feeling good and hope you all are too

Morning all! Just had a catch-up read to see how you're all doing. I notice a lot of encouragement and get a lovely community feel when reading this thread. Everyone knows how hard it is and are helping, cheering each other on.
I'm very much with @mumzof4x with abstaining but just enjoying the odd glass from time to time for really special occasions. @ForeverTipsy stroking bottles, can just imagine you doing it too 😂
Just read very interesting articles in The Telegraph about all the benefits from abstaining for at least 90 days. That was encouraging. Especially concerning mental health and depression. Learnt a bit reading them and helps me understand how it all works a bit better.
Still AF here, have lost count of the days to be honest, which in a way is good. I seem to have lost the habit and especially the "need" to have a drink. My sleep is very much better, the same with my gut health, without going into details.

Here are the articles if anyone is interested : https://www.telegraph.co.uk/health-fitness/diet/alcohol/three-months-without-alcohol-does-to-your-body/
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/health-fitness/diet/alcohol/health-benefits-of-giving-up-alcohol/
Wishing you all well and sending you positive and sunny vibes from beside the sea.
Stay strong and don't forget to love yourselves.

I'm at 4 weeks, and generally enjoying better sleep. I say generally, last night was rubbish. But I'd say most nights I'm sleeping right through, which is definitely an improvement.

Well done everybody, keep on keeping on

@BezMills 4 weeks is BRILLIANT - well done to you! This chat is so helpful for getting a little boost to keep going in those hard moments - especially surrounded by drinking… my friends were telling me I’d abstained long enough and I’d be ok to have a drink or two - it’s really seen as so harmless and necessary to drink.

I am at day 15 - think about alcohol a lot - not in the sense that I want to drink, but mulling over past episodes where I’ve really drank to excess and what I got out of it. I’m also watching DH down close to a bottle of wine each night to basically go to bed tipsy! I did that but I’m really struggling to understand why …

I have ZERO desire to drink and the days seem to be flying by now.

@Nowstrong - can’t wait for the time when I’m not even counting days - seems like that’s a real shift in terms of mindset and a sign that your new habits have stuck.

another snowy day here (Canada) - I am a Brit tho - so off to find things to fill up the day …. Yoga at lunchtime so that will make me feel good.

hope we all have an easy day.

Today it's a calendar month (my 'dry January' didn't start until the 6th)

Yesterday was a hard day, we had a difficult healthcare appt for DD(7) and I felt low for most of the day. I think normally I would have had a drink 'to cheer myself up'. Got to the end of the day, wasn't actually super tempted to drink but I think it was really one of those days when I might have cracked.

Keep on keeping on everybody

Morning all! Still AF here, was really tempted by a G&T on the plane home yesterday, but had a sparkling water and a bag of Maltesas. Not a good choice for the chocolates, but hey ho.
Jumped onto the scales this morning but had in fact lost a kilo. So that is good news. Now trying to stop the dreaded nibbles. I reckon that if I have changed one habit over a couple of years, I can now start to try change another one.
However, I must admit that stopping drinking has been such a revelation for me. I've got more energy, sleeping better, intestinal and mental health much better. So I'm focusing on this more than worrying about nibbling, which I want to stop for weight loss reasons, more than health, mental and body.
So as @BezMills says, I will keep on keeping on.
Keep up the good work @Seenoevil33.

Very cold here, brisk walk is on the agenda to burn off any left over chocolate.

Stay strong everyone!

@BezMills - wow a whole month - I really hope you celebrate this huge achievement- enjoy your success and well done for not caving in a stressful time!

@Nowstrong arent Maltese’s mainly air anyway? Isn’t it great to feel so good without the booze? And well done on the weight loss- I don’t appear to have lost any as yet …..

Day 18 here and still going well but a few random thoughts watching tv last night and people drinking wine - I had a real longing for it…. I’m also having real guilt at the amounts I used to drink - way way over 14 units - maybe I’ve already done terrible damage to my body - it makes me feel terrified to even think about having another drink! Equally the thought of never ever being able to have a single glass of wine again is fairly terrifying.

Anyhow try not to think of that and just commit to not drinking today.

@ForeverTipsy hope you’re still powering through on your way to 100 days AF!

Hey everyone, just checking in.

I got a job this week! Been out of work for a few months and I'm thrilled. Was so weird not to buy a bottle of fizz to celebrate. I drank a can of Trip out of a champagne flute instead 😂 My new boss is a friend and is more or less tee-total. That will help. I my last place of work my boss drank wine most nights and bragged about getting so drunk she'd fall down stairs regularly. Seems bizarre a person line managing a team would often share this in the office. We'd often buy each other a bottle of wine for a birthday gift or celebration, it was part of the culture. So I'm happy my new place won't have the same.

My alcohol cravings have really gone down over the past couple of weeks (I'm on day ... wait...off to check I Am Sober...day 36). Some days I'm finding the thought of drinking wine a bit gross?! Progress I think.

@ForeverTipsy what great news! I feel you on the bit missing out of the celebration but really you would be drinking away your good feelings - enjoy every second of your excitement without dulling it with alcohol! And you’re so close t reaching 50 days which just seems monumental!

Day 20 and I’m so excited to have made it this far without any real problems- yes I have cravings but I e taken drinking today off the menu so I’ll have to make a conscious decision in the morning that I’m going t drink - there’s no way I’m that crazy!

DH had 4 AF days this week and I can see him trying to drink slower when he is drinking - it’s still irritating me but I’m trying to just focus on me and my battle.

hope you all have a great weekend x

Just checking in to see how we are all doing! I’ve booked my 3 monthly blood test for Saturday (this includes ALT & AST) so am preparing myself for some horrible numbers - last done in October and all were good but I got a little out of control in December so expecting to see the results from that …

Day 23 here and not really having any significant cravings - maybe for a couple of minutes here and there but fine apart from that. Saving an absolute fortune now I’m not buying any booze although I’m drinking so many cans of sparkling water - hope to not need the placebo effect at some point - I pretend they’re alcoholic! Always thought I didn’t really like sparkling flavored water but actually it’s bloody great….

hope you’re all doing well and out living your best af lives …

Hello. I've hit my six weeks milestone so chuffed with that. New job going well but I'm shattered. Too tired to want wine ! Though I did crave it on a stressful afternoon yesterday I can't lie. Kids were being awkward and miserable and I wanted a cold glass of white to "take the edge off". Resisted and kept busy so all good. Still over compensating with food and hot chocolate but Rome wasn't built in a day.

@Seenoevil33 what are those tests? Something to do with your liver? I hope you're pleasantly surprised. And which cans of flavoured Fizzy water are you enjoying please? I've got a fridge full of Trip as subscribed.

@ForeverTipsy congrats on 6 weeks - well on your way to 2 months!

Day 25 for me and another winter storm trapping me inside…

The tests are standard for my rheumatologist as I’m on some heavy drugs which can affect liver - up until now all have been good so fingers crossed.

im in Canada but the sparkling waters are Bubly - come in loads of different flavours… I also have a fridge full of cbd drinks which I mix with sparkling water so that 1 can lasts for the whole evening - I really enjoy them

@Seenoevil33 sorry to hear of your health problems, I can see why you're determined to cut right back on booze if you're on heavy meds that can affect liver function. Will you be on those for life? Good luck Saturday.

I'm on the CBD oil drinks tonight...I'm finding it so so hard not to celebrate a very successful first week in a fab new job with my usual drink...was SO tempted to pop a bottle of fizz earlier!! My youngest kept me strong, reminded me not to lose my streak and said I can do it. Had a friend over and she was saying about going home and having a nice big glass of wine, and she was heavily encouraging me to do the same. Usual stuff of "you've done so well! 43 days is amazing! Why not have a night off and celebrate? Just one? You can restart tomorrow?" Etc etc.

But I'm in a bubble bath with a book and my Trip drink in a nice wine glass. And posting here! This has been the hardest day yet but I can do it.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

@ForeverTipsy well done on resisting. We will have days like this - I know I do - especially when I’m happy or excited. I’m just still making a commitment each morning not to drink for that day - it gets me through those moments(hours) because the earliest I can break my commitment is the next morning…

also let’s focus on how incredible we will feel when we get to 100 days! A brief moments isn’t worth going through Day 1, 2, 3 …. Again

so well done to you and to your youngest who is clearly very proud of you.

Thank you so much @Seenoevil33 - your words of support and encouragement mean a lot. And yes, I hope my youngest is proud of me like I'm proud of him ❤️

It's the anniversary of my mum dying today. Another day where I'd normally raise a glass. Though alcohol was a significant contributing factor to her passing at age 59, so the past couple of years I've made a conscious effort to not drink alcohol on this day. So hard though.

@ForeverTipsy lets raise a glass of sparkling water for your mum - I’m sure that she would be in awe of your determination to succeed!

Morning all (it is where I am at the moment), I had one glass of red wine on my flight here, which to be honest I could have gone without as it wasn't the best you could drink. However, I was looking for the relaxation or wishful thinking. I did manage to sleep 2 hours on a 10 hour flight. Did up on my film watching though.
Yesterday I caught up on my sleep (blissful) and today I'm continuing my travels AF and refreshed.
Sending understanding wishes for the anniversary of the loss of your mother. Mine passed many years ago. Much too young but also most probably quickened by too much alcohol in her younger years. As for my dad, it definitely killed him in the end.
So I'm proud to have dropped the habit which did run in the family. Even my sister is now (it seems) being more careful.

Sending lots of positive vibes to all. Am on phone and have a dreadful memory so can't tab usefully. Stay strong

It feels like ages for me, but it's not quite 6 weeks (that's Monday). So I guess 40 days at the moment.

Well done everybody, keep on keeping off it

Six weeks today. Yesterday was a hard day. My DM died suddenly in September and I've been meaning to go through her jewellery (needs done for reasons to do with the will). So yesterday we went though everything and took pictures of it all, and stored it properly. There was a smell of her perfume in the air as we went through the boxes, not an easy thing, very sad. I really wanted a drink after doing that, not gonna lie.
But I decided I'd rather wake up today with 6 weeks in the bag, than have a drink. So I stayed "aff it"!

@BezMills awesome achievement! Look at you! I got to 4weeks yesterday and felt flat. Much better today and looking ahead to the end of February- I will not drink today ….

4 weeks is a good run, keep on keeping on