On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining - new thread for summer 2024

[Bigbus]

@amdone123 @touty @coppergate7 @swannyb
@Hohofortherobbers @YoghurtPotWashingMachine @Mj20 @Freezingfeetwarmheart @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

The last thread got full before a new one could be started. I’ve tried to tag some of the regular posters but I don’t really know what I’m doing! Let me know if this works and please tag people I’ve missed.

@Jbob1976 20 days is amazing !
Don't know about you but the first day is always the hardest for me. More the thought.
You're doing so well in that you're recognising your triggers ... can that change?
Do you have a bestie who can help or can we on here do anything ?
I've recognised that 5-8.30 is my trigger time ..... stress when dd 14 )additional needs) gets in and the evening meal and trying to unwind from a super stressful job.
I look forward to weekend wine and that along with amazing sleep / mornings / presence / focus / weight and even clearer skin will get me through 5.30 until 8 tonight
That amd anand an appointment with the dental hygienist .. I swear I need GAS AND AIR when she gets that damn scraper device out !

Happy anniversary, @Amdone123, that's wonderful.

@Jbob1976

What would happen if you DIDN'T drink tonight? If you poured it down the sink, or locked it away?

@Jbob1976 just checking in to give another virtual hand hold. Hope you're ok this evening.

Morning, folks, hope you're all ok.
I ended up having a bottle of prosecco last night, only because dh bought it for me. I really enjoyed it. I definitely wanted to carry on, but I rarely go out for it ( she says. Last Thursday I ran to the shop like Usain Bolt), so I'm pleased about that.
I'm ok today - I think I would have been tempted this evening anyway so all good.

Afternoon all! AF day 4. Not much else to say really, well not anything of any interest. Feeling very positive and am active. Sleeping really well. Thinking of you all. Sending positive vibes as usual. Stay strong. Waves at devils and angels alike. I'm such a bore 😉

OMG!!! Have I actually killed the thread? Fell off the wagon, well sipped slipped, then fell. On a Thursday too. Festivities planned this weekend here, Bastille day and all that, it will most probably pour with rain if the forecasts are correct, so will have a good excuse to stay at home and not be tempted to have any naughty drinks, or sausages and chips. Will see. Absolutely fed up of the weather though. Wet and not too warm.
Hope you are all doing OK. Sending best vibes possible and hope someone will come back soon. Missing you all.

@Nowstrong 🤣 - I knew you'd think that !
I started to post yesterday but drank wine instead - again, dh bought it for me.
I'll be glad when summer and holidays and football are over.
I won't drink this evening though I'm tempted as I'm so tired - a massive trigger for me is tiredness.
Got a very special event tomorrow and I need to look my best, so vanity will probably save the day.

@Amdone123 hope you look gorgeous and enjoy your day.

Good morning everyone and sorry I haven’t posted for a while - I’ve read everyone’s posts. I had my event last Saturday and did drink quite a bit (including tequila 🤢) but I actually had a really brilliant time, ended up out dancing which I haven’t done for years and got home at 3.30am with the sun coming up! I did have a hangover but I remember everything, didn’t embarrass myself and got home safely. I think I managed it by buying small glasses (125mls) and chatting a lot. It was a one off and that’s really something I want to be able to achieve - have the occasional blow-out without doing anything stupid or dangerous.

last night went for a meal with some friends. I managed to moderate pretty well - I asked for a small glass of wine in the pub and my friend was trying to persuade me to have a large (even though he doesn’t drink!) but I stood firm and ended up feeling good at the end of the night.

Number of days drinking might need to come down a bit. I manage AF 3 days a week most weeks without any bother but I think 4 or 5 would be better

I hope everyone has a good week. To those struggling I can remember not that long ago when 1 bottle of red wine in an evening was a quiet night! I was easily getting through 5 bottles a week just at home as a minimum. It’s easily done and a hard habit to break.

Hi to everyone
I love how this thread is so supportive and non judgemental as we all are on different stages of our journeys.
I m on AF Day 19 here.
Have been out twice, admittingly not long nights out, maybe 2 hrs but stuck with AF beer, and it was fine. I didn't really notice a difference.

Big challenge will be Sunday when I m out with friends to watch the football final. I plan to start off the eve with an AF beer or 2 and then I ll see. I d love to be able to moderate but I m afraid i won't be able to hit the stop button. We ll live in hope. I m not saying I won't drink, and if I want one I ll have one but I need to be mindful and not slip back into old habits.

So 19 days off alcohol and have more energy, sleeping better. Face is less puffy. Wine belly has reduced, I'm eating well, exercising, but I haven't even lost a single pound!! So disheartening but at least I feel healthier. Have a lovely wk end everyone.

Hello all

I’m still here but it hasn’t been a great week. Stressful with various things going on so ended up drinking every night. Hate what it does to my sleep but still do it!

Going to a mini festival at our local pub for a bit this afternoon but am not going to drink. But will probably drink tonight at home.

Will get back to AF from Monday for a few days.

Yep - still here too.
Not doing great - football, anniversary, football, 1st Holy communion, football, the list is endless.

I'm 2 weeks dry. Had the shakes (or something like them) one morning and it scared the crap out of me!

It's not easy but it's not hard at the moment. Biggest improvement is sleep, though woke up strangely early this morning. On new meds as well which might be helping in some way. Keep going everyone and have a nice Sunday.

Morning all.

Didn’t end up going to festival yesterday so that made it easy to not drink in the afternoon.

Had two glasses of white and a glass and a half of red last night. Didn’t actually quite finish the red either. Went to bed early instead!

@OhShitImNearly40 well done on 2 weeks, that's great. Have you had any cravings, or urges?
If so, what did you do instead ?
@Peridot1 I find if I have no social engagements, I can abstain. I still have moments when I drink at home, in fact I prefer that, but I can also abstain better.

Speaking of social engagements, I have nothing now until 2 weeks, so I'm going to try really hard to abstain.
I need a break from it.

@Amdone123 had a few fleeting ones but nothing too awful. Been drinking loads of pop instead. Quite a bit of snacking as well!

Well I was doing so well - AF for 7 days and then I crashed and burned last night. Made the mistake of a glass of wine in the afternoon outside at the pub which of course lead to more. I'm staying with PIL atm and got back pretty drunk and then went to the pub with DH to watch the football. I vaguely remember chatting absolute shit to my FIL and maybe even possibly crying (came here to visit my 8 week old niece and I think I might have been crying over wanting another but not being able to go through with it - had multiple miscarriages before DS). I'm so embarrassed today and I feel like utter shit. Heart rate is high today because alcohol is a trigger of my newly discovered condition so it's safe to say I feel fucking horrible. What a mess.

Hope everyone is doing better than I am today!

@enoughisenough4 try to put it behind you, now. You did nothing wrong and even though you feel embarrassed, there's no need - you're only human and I'm sure your fil won't think any less of you.
I hope you manage to get through today - I'm always glad when the day after the night before is over.
Nice bath, early night.

@enoughisenough4 I can imagine though, how after 7 days af, sat in a pub, all the football mania, lead to more. It's so difficult.

I didn't drink yesterday but only because I was tired and hungover. There's even fancy wine in the fridge. My head was banging by the time the football started ( 8pm is my bedtime), and I even thought, oohh have a glass of wine. Honestly, what batshit is that.

@enoughisenough4 I really need to have a dry spell so if you ( and anyone on here, of course) want to do the next 5 days af with me, I'm available. I want to do 10 but I'm breaking it down.

Morning all! Didn't do to well during the weekend, but moderated well, and did a lot of walking on Saturday. Sunday had kids for lunch, my DD's partner was feeling mighty sorry for himself with a hangover, so it was a quiet one.

Went carb mad in the evening, nibbled, then had lots of cheese on lots of toast, and a couple of spritzes, large ones. Three to be honest. Then I had a right go at myself and took myself off to bed early in a huff.
This morning I was surprised that I did sleep OK, got up, made up with myself and became very active. Case is packed for tomorrow, leaving at the unholy hour of 03H45.
As I am feeling very guilty about the Spritzes, and trying to forget about the carbfest, I have renewed my swimming subscription and booked into 18 aqua fitness classes for when I get back. I have sport later this morning, so I'm off the naughty step. But I must admit that this makes me SO mad with myself as I'm trying to lose weight. This is not how to go about it, having a snack, spritz and carbfest.
Anyhow...back on the wagon it is. Will be greatly moderating on holiday as in Morocco and alcohol doesn't exactly flow freely, even if I do know where to get some nice Rosé as a treat. Also will be with very strict second DD who will keep us all on the sport and healthy eating track. So win, win.
I really don't know why I can't stay AF for more than a few days at a time. This is really getting to me. Don't know how to get past this blockage. I'm really admirative of those who are succeeding in more than 6 days. Cheering you all on from the side lines. I don't know if it's real cravings or "don't care" moments. I'm even thinking of seeing a therapist to help me. I haven't been even tipsy for months and months. I just enjoy the slight relaxation feeling that a couple of glasses of wine give me. Very happy to stop at 2. Why I made spritz, even though with fizzy water, I just don't know, I had ice cold rosé on hand. Just can't be totally AF for more than 4 days at the moment.
Perhaps I should just accept that 4 days AF, then 2 or 3 days moderating, is better than drinking everyday. But I want to be doing more AF days at a go.
@enoughisenough4, you're only human and well done for the 7 AF days.
@Amdone123 I'd like to do 10 too. Just can't seem to manage it.
@Wakeupcall12 wow! Well done on 19!
Well off to sport. Enough droning on, but writing it all done is really therapeutic for me. Sorry for such a long winded, moaning, woe is me, post, because I am in fact feeling very positive.
So AF day 1 again here. Sending lots of encouragements to all. SSS

@enoughisenough4 - that sounds tough. As @Amdone123 says put it behind you. I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as yours u think. And it sounds as if there is a few things you might need to unpick in your head - which won’t be helping.

@Amdone123 - I’m definitely on to go AF till Friday. So four days. And then I’ll see. If I could reliably do four AF days a week most weeks id be happy.

I drank last night. Usual couple of glasses of white before dinner and then red after. Didn’t think it was too much but woke up in the night feeling crap. And then remembered I hadn’t drunk any water at all yesterday so think I was dehydrated anyway. I didn’t stay up late - we watched the football but I went to bed at half time as it was a bit boring and decided I’d rather read my book.

So I have a bottle of AF mojito drink in the fridge for the next few nights.

@Amdone123 @Peridot1 another one for four days here.

The AF during the week I seem to be managing (just) but my drinking has shot up at the weekend in the last couple of weeks. Need to try a lot harder this weekend. It's annoying because I feel so much happier in myself when I moderate successfully.

Well I fell at the first hurdle tonight! DH offered me a glass of wine and i was so fed up looking at the rain that I said yes. However I only had the one and made it last two hours. So not too bad I think.

Still pissed off at the weather and contemplating building an ark!

@Peridot1 , I've fallen too - I know I can't have it in the house, but I didn't bring it !!
In previous times, I'd have poured it away - but yeah, just excuses here.
I was contemplating giving it to a neighbour- but I don't know them that well - erghh, I'll pay tomorrow.

I was a friend tonight - my best friend's mum is definitely on her way out - no excuses but , she did need me ❤️
I'm sick of making excuses though.