Day 1 or 1000 all welcome on the tulips and snowdrops thread 🌷

[AFmammaG]

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/alcohol_support/4930949-tulips-snowdrops-and-another-day-1?page=40&reply=134961706

Ladies I’m making this new thread as we’ve gone up to 993 posts on the other thread and I need to link it before we fill up!

Will post a proper into later.

thanks @AAFmammaG for the thread. Day 12 for me, since joining the April thread at day 1.. the early evening slot is definitely the trickiest, when I would have the first glass of wine, but beyond that I'm loving waking up fresh, listening to all the podcasts, and reading your stories. thank you for being a safe place where I can stay accountable

Day 3 (another day 3! 🙃) but feeling really positive, so am going to follow this thread for a bit of solidarity in the tough times. X

Lurked on the other thread, going to lurk on this one too!

Having a wobble guys!

It's Friday , bank holiday, suns out and DH has just cracked open a nice cold can of beer...

I WANT ONE
😩

I keep arguing with myself ..
Oh one won't hurt ..
But it will .. because I can't moderate
And thats the whole point of me wanting to just stop it once and for all !
Arrgh

I've poured myself a lemonade with ice and lemon .. refreshing.. but not hitting the spot

I wanna feel that fuzzy relaxed feeling !

Well done @VanLife33 - you will definitely be pleased in the morning. Stay strong people - you got this!

I can highly recommend the AF Martinis for a warm fuzzy feeling!

The moment has passed
thankfully it was only fleeting

I've eaten now so maybe they helped!

Hi all

Day 5 for me. It's not been too tough until now but I am struggling so much today. It was a stressful day and I would give anything to crack open a bottle of wine to relax and unwind, but I know that I'll end up drinking the whole bottle, feeling like crap and regretting giving into the devil tomorrow

Well done @AFreshCleanStart

Sorry for the late post! I’m dry! I’m just getting an early night and have a busy weekend. I had a pub dinner tonight and despite others drinking, I wasn’t tempted. Think being the OP on this thread helps.

Well done to those struggling but resisting tonight @VanLife33 & @AFreshCleanStart. Agree with those saying focus on the benefits! Nice calm sleep, clear head in the morning, that air of smugness while your other half drinks! Whatever works for you! I’m out early tomorrow so won’t be able to post until later but I’m rooting for everyone, those posting, those lurking and those not yet able to get through day 1. Remember for most of us we are trying to undo the habit of a lifetime in a matter of months. This isn’t easy! Go us!

@PissPotPourri your comment about Eurovision made me laugh out loud! The struggle is real!

Hi everyone and thanks for the new thread @AFmammaG
Day 205 for me today. I've had a really stressful week at work, a year ago I would have downed wine to 'switch off' in the evenings, then celebrated having got to the weekend. But today I'm proud of how I've handled it all - calm, assured and in control despite the uncertainty (sometimes downright unpleasant), way would I have felt like this when I was drinking. Reason number 999 not to drink - I actually deal with things like a proper grown up, it's very empowering after years of focussing more on hiding my love of booze.

Have a great weekend everyone and it's so great reading your updates, meeting new people who are just finding us or were lurking on the last thread xx

Hi all - great to hear everyone’s updates - day 2 for me (for the 100th time) done and dusted but I’ve ate constantly all day - and so much crap! I never ate anything between Monday and Wednesday night (and when I did eat on Wednesday it promptly came back up 🤢) so that’s my excuse for gorging.

something happened today that made me really look at my DH in a negative way. Nothing really bad, just a very negative comment about one of our DC. I then started thinking about things he does that I don’t like but I’ve basically had him on a pedestal our whole 30 year relationship- it’s made me realise need to put myself first and stop trying to please him so much. He’s not a bad man but I’ve been so desperate to be “a great wife” I’ve let him have all his own way.

also just watched an Amy wine house documentary on prime and it’s really given me a kick up the arse to stay sober and get my self respect back.

so back to healthy eating and the gym tomorrow- I need to lose 3 stone 😱

Hope everyone is having a Good Friday night and that the weekend is AF ❤️

Dropping in to say good luck. 8 years ago I was you'all. Now I've been sober all this time and life is just so much better than when I was drinking. One day at a time - you can do it !

@AFmammaG @Steppered thank you both. Just fed up of it really, can’t go a day. Drink time wether I want to or not. Happy have a drink, sad have a drink.

So exhausted from it, rules my life and all decisions I can make

@Bringonthesunforthewashing so sorry to hear you are struggling. I was in that place right up until this thread started at the end of the summer, but here I am with nearly 250 days under my belt. I cannot say for sure what made me be able to achieve it this time but I did do a hypnotherapy session I bought online. It was actually to moderate as I had no intention of quitting so it’s a bit odd. And I also had a boozy family event where one of my relatives had a skinful and was a complete and utter bore. I had also been putting off a blood test because I was worried about my liver. Lots of small things I guess.

What have you tried so far? It’s not for everyone but I still use alcohol free options to mark an occasion. Many of us were just going to bed super early. Some people were lighting a candle or having a bath. Or going for a walk or cycle or the gym. What might work for you?

Got out for a walk today and listened to a podcast. In it they said they were so tired of failing at moderating that they realised the way to stop failing was to stop trying to moderate. That’s totally me. I’ll be ok for a little while, try to convince myself I can do it and then spectacularly fail and the self loathing sets in.

@Bringonthesunforthewashing, could you try brushing your teeth mega early? Or leaving the house to walk or similar. The tool I found most useful was breaking that routine of arse on sofa, wine in hand.

@Pippa246 best of luck for day 3, I hope it went smoothly. I’ve done a heap more exercise since I joined these boards. I average 45mins a day, I cycle to work and sometimes go to an exercise class in the evening. I haven’t lost any weight 😆 BUT I haven’t gained any and my shape is certainly different. I think I’ve dropped a dress size.

Well done @MissSmith80 for not falling off the wagon. Being able to manage emotions better is definitely something I have experienced. I love feeling more in control.

Are you allowed non alcoholic beers? If so, I’m on day 74

@Tigger1895 absolutely!!! Well done on 74 days!

Hi all, joining from another thread. Day 125 AF. Definitely seeing myself as a non drinker now which is just as well as moderation doesn't work for me!

Hi all, hope you have enjoyed your weekends, it's so helpful to see all of your posts.

I was at a wedding yesterday, followed by a hotel stay. It's completely fair to say I wasn't really looking forward to it, but I actually had a really good time and stayed sober. I really enjoyed the ceremony and the meal, though the evening was more difficult. Once I realised I didn't want to sit right next to a blaring speaker and moved out into a comfier area I had a really good time and caught up with people. Nobody was completely hammered (though I'm fairly sure I would have been) and so the conversation was good. Even better, my DS9 also had a fab time - he suffers a bit with anxiety so it was great to be properly there for him, and he did so well, playing and chatting with people he'd never met before. But the best feeling was this morning! Went to bed at 1am and had to be up early for a train, but felt great - organised, clear headed, calm. 10/10 recommend. Day 131 done 😊