On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat *2024*

[Swannyb]

@amdone123 @mj20 @touty @Hohofortherobbers @Coppergate7 @bigbus @colouringindoors @wellitywellness @Atacamadesert @Freezingfeetwarmheart @WouldRatherBeAPieceOftToast @Hohofortherobbers @mickandrorty @Mykittensmittens @afaloren @NoTeaNoShade @CrackersCheeseNoWinePlease @LynnThese4reSEXPEOPLE @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

@Touty well done. Airports seem to attract rude people and being tired is a massive trigger for most of us.
I hope you slept well and can focus on a good, therapeutic break for yourself.
@Needtokickthehabit hope you're ok ❤️

Day 6 here and that came around quickly. I'm hoping to get to Saturday in one piece. If on Wednesday, we have a pub lunch, my target will be just 2 glasses of wine.
On Saturday, there will be 8 of us and all are big wine drinkers. I know I won't go mad because my granddaughter is with us, but I'm wondering if I can actually, for the first time in my life, dilute the wine with soda water. 🤔

Morning all. Slept really well, which is a relief. Really need my sleep. Not very physically active at the moment. In fact have muscle pain in one arm, messing around with too heavy weights at trial session at the gym. Won't be going back there, as I felt 100 years old, extremely noisy and felt completely out of place. So it will be back to the pool, but only seriously when I get back from long holidays mid April.
Still doing OK moderating. Sticking to my rules of no solo drinking, not more than 2 glasses (except for Sunday where I slipped up). I know that I'm not drinking enough plain water, but I am drinking loads of tea and hot drinks.
Threw some very yummy cherry filled chocolates out, no-one around me wanted them. So had to get rid of them. To stop picking one up, each time I passed the box. Not doing too well weight wise. Nibbling too much. Bloody cheese!
@Touty enjoy your holiday! Agree that airports being great places to people watch and but very frequently at their worst (I love people watching).
@Amdone123 well done on Day 6. I actually like a rosé or white wine with fizzy water, especially in the summer. With lots of ice cubes too, more water than wine. Grown up squash.
Hope everyone else is doing OK. @Needtokickthehabit sending positive vibes.
And SSS.

@Amdone123 I think you could dilute the wine but I’m not sure how that’s going to taste, maybe that will be helpful too 😂 Do you have any other drinks you like other than wine? I’m wondering if you could try a flavoured tonic water (minus the gin, for example)

Went on Saturday night and had one glass too many which brought back the early morning anxiety attack - haven't had one since I stopped drinking for DJ it was a horrible reminder. Gladly went back to the AF for school nights plan. It's hard to say no to that extra glass of wine though.

@touty - half the battle is convincing yourself you really want to have an alcohol free holiday - hopefully you've convinced your sub-conscious, first nights are the hardest
@Amdone123 Day 6, well done! Going out with a crowd of impassioned wine drinkers sounds like a challenge - clever move to focus on your GD. I always plan to drink water when I'm out and then fail miserably - I think mostly because I need to focus on that plan immediately before drinking rather than days before.
@Needtokickthehabit hope things improve for you soon. You are not being judged - you didn't plan to feel this bad.
@Nowstrong well done on the moderating!

Thank you all for the support and non judgement, god knows I am judging myself mor than anyone.

Yesterday evening one of the kids was not well so I put down the booze and brought them up to my bed for snuggles and tv. Woke this morning and there are still 7 beers in the fridge however I am not going to drink them this morning. They may get drank later this evening but not this morning. I think I need to stop the day and morning drinking first and whittle it down but today I am determined not to touch one of them beers till much later in the day. I cant believe how many mornings recently I have been on the booze at this time but no more.

Morning all.

Needtokickthehabit sending you positive vibes. Hope you can get some help, I have been there and tried hypnotherapy it worked wonders because I guess I really wanted it to. Big hugs

Had a boozy weekend, can't remember being so smashed on Saturday, think is was because not really drinking all week and it really hit, also did not eat, so just need to be more mindful. Back to AF this week and is feels good.

@Needtokickthehabit good luck today. I know you said you spoke to your GP before but can you go back? If you've been drinking throughout the day you may need help tapering before you can stop altogether. There is no shame in asking for help when you need it.

@MoodyBlues1 ahhhh not eating is fatal!

I'm approaching a fortnight AF and I am beginning to feel a difference, especially in the mornings.

Morning all, lovely to wake to such positive threads. We're all doing well in our own way. Yes @Needtokickthehabit you, too. You're thinking about it, you're challenging yourself and you're trying to address the problem. You're not ignoring it. Tapering off is as @Formel said, probably best but consider the gp again?
@Swannyb thanks - if I drank beer or gin n tonic Saturday, it wouldn't touch the sides, so I'll probably go for beer.

I'm feeling miles better af. Even with the family problem, I'm approaching it in a calmer manner, in my mind.
I can't change anyone else, I can only work on me.

@MoodyBlues1 oh god, not eating yes, lethal. Thankfully, we're eating Saturday but I remember the days of no food. Great plan to stay af this week.

Not eating is my superpower too sadly which never ends well.

I will give more thought to the gp and see if I can get an appointment although not likely but will try.

For some reason I completely loose my appetite when drinking. Also hate the food over here.
Needtokickthehabit tell them it is a crisis. Even if you can cut down the morning day drinking at first. I know it is hard. I put rules in place for my myself that I would not have a drink till 7pm and starting making it later. I am now managing AF days now after years of everyday drinking.

Today I walked 19 k steps and I just slept for 2 hours. I’m not sure if coming here was the best idea, I thought I had this under control but drink is on my mind but I haven’t had any. And I’m feeling quite lonely.

part of me just wants to go home to escape my feelings.

@Touty well done on the walking and you must have needed the sleep.
Sorry you're feeling a bit lonely. Maybe see what tomorrow brings - being there might take a bit of getting used to.
Hope you start to feel better.

Well I've had a mainly moderate February- until this week! It's all coming to a head with the in laws. Well I say that, as it has seemed that way millions of times lately then everything just carries on as normal and they keep on doing whatever the fuck they like! But this week we are hoping something will actually get sorted, as the relevant authorities are now concerned enough to be stepping in and helping us out a bit.....

So yes, I am pretending this week hasn't happened then back on with the moderation for March. I quite like the sound of Moderate March 😁

@Amdone123 thank you. I survived yesterday. I bought some af gin and tonic in cans so I found them helpful.

I will do some more walking today.

Ok moderation last night night one. I drank 5 of the 7 beers and when I tell you that is restraint for me currently it really is because leaving the other two would normally play on my mind but I have a different outlok now. I took out an actual notepad last nigt and wrote out all the good things that I can achieve if not drinking. I also totted up how much I have been spending and nearly vomited. All that on NOTHING. I mean it is astounding and while 5 beers to a 'normal' person is a lot for me recently it is nothing. I know I cannot go cold turkey AND I have a night out Friday but if I get it down to a normal level and then work on a few AF days a week that is my goal at this point.

@Touty walking is great for clearing your mind. You're doing so well not drinking - I know it's hard 💪
@Needtokickthehabit well done for your great start. Baby steps and keep writing it all down. I always do that when it gets too much. Or on your phone in the notes part - then you can read it back.

Day 7 here. I'm sat in the hairdressers and the thought of wine this afternoon crossed my mind. I know it's not a great idea so I'm trying to ignore it. I always think maybe 1 glass, but it's never 1 glass.

Needtokickthehabit That is a brilliant start . Writing things down deems like a good idea.
Amdone123 Ooh enjoy the hairdrrssers.
Another AF night for me, had the worse nights sleep ever ( probably about 2 hours) but I feel ok weirdly.

Hello I’ve been keeping up with all your news. @Touty enjoy your holiday! I would really struggle to be AF because I associate alcohol so much with treats and nice times. But I have to remember times when I’ve been by myself and I’ve drunk a bottle of wine then woken up in the night is such a panic - it’s horrible!

@Needtokickthehabit that’s a great plan - just a few beers a night for a few days instead of where you have been will be a great step forward.

@Amdone123 i hope you had a good afternoon and if you did have a glass of wine it was nice.

I went out tonight with a friend. I planned to have 3 single gins with slimline tonic and….i did! Usually I have these plans then just order wine instead but I stuck to my plan and had a lovely evening. It’s so weird - I keep thinking I should be drunk but I’m not!

@Bigbus that's a brilliant result, well done!
3 g n ts would be a great target for me when I go out. I'll try for a Bigbus Target 🎯
What an amazing feeling too, feeling sober but you still had a lovely time.

I'm day 8, and didn't drink yesterday. I knew deep down it wouldn't be a good idea. I was craving a glass though when relaxing in the evening and this is why I don't have it in.

Very proud of myself today.
I went for a long walk before work and stopped for lunch and a glass of wine. The wine was so nice that I thought after work, I'll buy wine to take home.
At work I drank water and tea and decided against buying wine as the moment had passed. It was a lovely moment but I didn't need to carry on.
Passed 3 shops on the way home but played it forward.
Possibly a first for me that 💪

Well done @Amdone123!

Into my third week AF now (sounds so much more impressive than day 16 lol) and I love not being hungover in the morning but starting to miss the sense of relaxation in the evening. I know that the reality is that it isn't relaxing in the least, it causes stressed mornings and anxiety during the day, but it's hard to let go of the psychological associations.

@Bigbus yes it has not been easy but I’ve managed to distract myself.

Today was a struggle - I had the booze monster shouting in my ear, I nearly gave in, but I know if I give in now I’ll have to deal with booze every day either thinking about it or drinking it. And then I played it forward and I knew that I wouldn’t just have one drink, it would be a few.

After my rock bottom event at new year I really need to kill the booze.

8 weeks sober.

The results are in: 13 dry days in February, after about 9 years without a single dry day. Winning! 😍

@Touty well done on 8 weeks - you're doing really well. And especially as you've batted away the cravings, that's really difficult to do. Are you enjoying your mini break now ?
@sixthvestibule wow, that is absolutely brilliant. Will you set a target for march ( I'm thinking 15 af days ? ❤️), or just see how you get on ?
@Formel week 3 is really good, well done you. I was just thinking about the relaxation side and my 1 glass. I read that really you only need one glass - it does the job of relaxing you. The ensuing glasses you don't really need ( more of a want). It's difficult to stop at 1, I know, but it just made me think.

My first half of February was pretty diabolical ( 6 bottles in 2.5 weeks), but I'm pleased that the last 10 days, I've only had 1 bottle and 1 glass. I'm pleased that I didn't just carry on and that I found the strength to reign it in.

March, I'll be trying really hard as 1) I need to lose 7lb to get to my target and 2) I need to not spend pounds to reach my savings target.
I'm going to have a few af weekends as they're Key for me. If I do drink, it'll not be a 2 bottle occasion as frankly, I just can't do that anymore.