On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Can't believe the last thread has already filled up!

Thank you to all of you for the incredible support shown in the last thread especially @amdone123.

Everyone is welcome! This is a safe, non judgmental space.

Sorry about my inability to tag everyone but if others can that would be great!

5 days done and into the early hours of day 6 for me - and I still haven't even wanted a drink! I remember when I did Dry January before it was all I could think about from the start, then I got rat-arsed on Feb 1st to make up for it. Hoping this bodes well 😅

@wellitywellness I've been reading the book by David Nutt you quote in my blog - I wouldn't say I was an alcoholic either but definitely in the problem drinker territory. Close to alcoholic territory in the past also going by some of the descriptions, although I've never been physically dependent.

@Freezingfeetwarmheart well done on Day 5 - it's good that you're not craving or anything.
I'm not craving it, but I am, at odd moments, thinking about it.
When I'm working, I'm thinking along the lines of a reward - big problem for me.

I need a plan for Sat and Sun - a reward that's not alcohol. I have been thinking about this already so I'm going to rest at weekend - watch films, read, sleep, bit of pampering and cook something nice.
I love cooking and am pleased that I no longer need a glass of wine in hand to do it.
A reward is actually staying in, and not having to leave the house.

@Amdone123 that actually sounds like a lovely weekend!
My tricky times will be when I'm stressed mainly. Or when DH fancies a drink and I don't - I think this will be OK so long as this alien "not actually wanting one" feeling continues!

As we get close to the weekend I’m feeling a little less confident.

I have a lunch (all you can eat buffet) on Saturday so that will be easy to not drink at but Sunday is the day I will really struggle with as my DH and I usually would go out for a boozy lunch. As it’s the first Sunday AF I think it may be best if we don’t do a lunch out at all so there is no temptation.

@Amdone123 your weekend plans sounds great! Putting effort into cooking a nice meal is a good reward for a week at work.

The few days of being AF have made me realise this is a much better route for me, for now. Once I start I CANNOT stop (drinking, that is).

Wow, this thread is fast moving! I've got my first day back at work today, and am feeling grot - trying to take it easy and not go hell for leather, so I won't be too exhausted later and find myself craving wine. I'll try a Goodrays instead and feed back!

@wellitywellness the goodrays drinks are great! The orange and grapefruit one was my favourite. I find that one does have a mild calming effect and just feels like 'something'. Also the ingredients are all really good too. I think I prefer it to a glass of wine!

Morning everyone. I was driving last night up until about 7.15 pm, massive relief to get home - a long drive in the dark with drizzle. I craved putting my PJs on and watching mindless TV more than alcohol. It was quite an emotional day.

AF#3 More time & energy to build real connections with people

@Amdone123 Was that a one-off with your dog/have you got to the bottom of when s/he was unsettled?

I was aware that the following things helped to keep me AF on the meal out: DS (and SIL) not drinking either, mocktail menu (had two and then switched to lime and soda and then just water as the sweetness became too much), being with people I have plenty to talk about with (unlike DH sometimes I think now - he talks about work a lot and alcohol helps me engage with that more, oh and not get irritated as he gets increasingly drunk) and being 100% sure that I would regret even one glass.

Hello all! Sorry very late to the alcohol free party, but am on Day 4 of my first ever Dry January. Always found excuses to not do it before but I really need to tackle my alcohol consumption and poor relationship with it. Not feeling very confident but taking one day at a time.
Does anyone else imagine the Big Brother voice over man saying "it's Day 4 in the DJ hoose and pedestrian is feeling nervous "?

Checking in for day 4 with my changed username.
Still going strong here so far, was tempted last night but had an AF beer instead

@Pedestriancrossing hi and welcome! Well done on Day 4. I think I have said the big brother voice to myself 🤣 - you'll find on here we all have similar thoughts !

@Coppergate7 yes, dog is suffering from old age symptoms. Thinking about it, I was more unsettled so woke him.( I was getting irritated due to something else - I recognised the pattern).
He's great today, in fact we've only just woke.

All good here, day 4 and yes @Swannyb it's a much better way to live for me, too. So many benefits, I just have to keep remembering this.

@Amdone123 some pampering and cooking something nice sounds great, its one of my resolutions to start cooking more good food rather than the same 5 or 6 things, the joys of a fussy family, but i have decided they can at the very least try new things once! I'm so fed up of boring food!

@CrackersCheeseNoWinePlease love the name change 😄. Though I was very fond of the other...
I like af beer. I must get some - af perroni is really nice. Added bonus, I can stop after 2 glasses.

@mickandrorty definitely. I'm no Gordon Ramsey but I make some lovely dishes. Last week I made chicken fried rice, so nice. This week I'm trying beef in Yorkshire pudding wraps with mini roast.
How did you get on last night ?

@Amdone123 chicken fried rice sounds tasty i might have to try that. Yorkshire pudding wraps also sound really nice! I made my first ever curry from scratch on Monday and it actually came out pretty well its given me confidence to try something else now.
I could of done better (a lot better) but I was up without feeling like death this morning, I will try again tonight, its just so hard!

Am doing really badly. Need an idea evening without drinking :(

@WouldRatherBeAPieceOftToast can you try to have this evening af ?
Do you need a plan ? Something to distract yourself, something af in to have, some nice food ?
@mickandrorty is right. It is hard. For me, I see it as a treadmill sometimes. It's hard to step off, but once you do, it gets a bit easier.
@WouldRatherBeAPieceOftToast what can you do this evening instead ?
Keep posting - we're all here for you.

Maybe try adding 30 mins onto whenever you start drinking and then see how you feel when you get there - delaying is progress if you don’t think you can tackle a day stopping completely, sometimes I find I can keep delaying and the end up AF when I didn’t think I could - other times I just end up having one less drink and being in a slightly better place to build upon the next day. Good luck!

I'm feeling on top of my game today.
Day 4 and no cravings / intrusive thoughts. I'm determined to not drink tomorrow evening. Strangely since I planted THAT seed, it's working the same as the other !

Yesterday morning was a different matter. Was asking myself why I join fora or sign up to initiatives such as Dry Jan.
I was definitely tired.
Worth using the HALT technique, I think.
Hungry, annoyed, lonely, tired ?

Well, today was an absolute pigfucker of a day all told - both first one back at work after the Christmas break and an emergency vet's appointment in the mix for my poorly feline boy (currently curled up next to me, all dosed up on a heady mix of opioids, antibiotics and painkillers...).

I really, really wanted a red wine, but a call to my mum helped - and am now trying this Goodrays CBD drink - it does actually give the mildest of highs, but not enough to touch the edges today!

Anyhoo, here is today's offering - which is based on close reading of the lovely David Nutt's 'Drink?' book, and actually makes for some pretty encouraging reading in some ways. I definitely feel empowered off the back of this, that's for sure... Hopefully it helps one or two others on here as well...

https://wellitywellness.com/2024/01/04/dry-january-4-drink/

Echo other people's comments on the increased importance of food - Options belgian hot chocolate is definitely my friend at the moment, and have a giant box of Lindor to eat up as well... Am avoiding certain foods that just 'go' with wine - anything Italian and weekend 'treat foods' basically - in favour of more wintery warmer dishes (hearty stews, soups etc.) or "lunch" foods for dinner, where that same association doesn't exist.

@wellitywellness sorry to hear you had a bad day ( and a poorly cat), but well done for swerving the red. It takes a lot of willpower.
I've never read any quit lit, but reading on your blog the science behind it - I've found interesting. Maybe because it's not a book !

Yes, food and wine. That's why I struggled when cooking, they just went hand in hand, but I gradually stopped and now it doesn't bother me. Gives me hope that !
I've been drinking nescafe caramel lattes and adding caramel flavour drops - really nice. No chocolate for me - not much anyway.

Thanks @Amdone123 - my initial aim was to write summaries of all the books I read to go back to, and then I thought why not share...? Glad you are liking it!

Oh lord. I’m in such a bad, keyboard stabby mood that I made a big post then reported myself by jabbing the wrong buttons - what a knob

@wellitywellness i was basically saying I tagged you on the other thread about the drinks and how I find them (the CBD ones!)

Morning - into day 7 for me. I did start thinking about drinking more than I have been last night, but not enough to want one yet. Probably because I've been reading some more of Professor Nutt's book, maybe I should quit the quit lit too, or stick with the harsher ones if I must 😅

@wellitywellness sending love to you and your poorly cat, we have had a couple of those lately and lost one of them at the end of November, certainly didn't help my drinking.

As it's January, as well as the not drinking I am trying to eat healthy- and every single year I make a new year's resolution to learn the guitar but never last longer than April! Thankfully the few months every year is making me a LITTLE bit better when I come back to it every year and now it's at least giving me something to do with my hands instead of drink!

@Mykittensmittens hopefully your post isn't so stabby it's gone against community guidelines and will be reinstated soon 😅