On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Can't believe the last thread has already filled up!

Thank you to all of you for the incredible support shown in the last thread especially @amdone123.

Everyone is welcome! This is a safe, non judgmental space.

Sorry about my inability to tag everyone but if others can that would be great!

@Coppergate7 we're halfway through October, so what about aiming for the next 2 weeks ? One day at a time of course ❤️

@Coppergate7 had hot milk, with some Horlicks, last night, cuddled up in bed. Bliss. Tonight will do a replay. Have to get up very early tomorrow morning. Pretty determined to do my best. Will report back soon.
Take care everyone, stay strong.

Hello 👋

Can I join?

I've been drinking a bit too much. Not everyday, but too much on the days I do drink. I like the suggestion^^ of aiming for the next two weeks off completely, so I might go for that.

There are so many reasons for me to cut down or even quit completely. Just need to remember them 😬

@PrawnBhunaandaFlirtini hi and welcome on board, course you can join.
I have so many reasons why I'm better off not drinking / cutting back !
I wrote them down once, so many - you could try that, so you don't forget ?
Have you abstained before ?
Do you think you could do the next 2 weeks, or rather, what obstacles would be in your way ?

Thanks @Amdone123. I made a little list on my phone earlier and have been looking at it when I've started to think "fuck it, it's still weekend" etc

@PrawnBhunaandaFlirtini good start !
Would you drink now ? I'm an early to bed type - so it wouldn't occur to me to drink now, but I know it's when 'normal' people drink. I prefer daytime - lethal really.
I was just thinking that I should attempt the next 2 weeks. I'll be fine during the week, it's just weekend really, but I should really try.
If I'm af til end of October, I'll only have had 2 bottles of wine in this month, which is pretty good for me !

Morning all. How is everyone doing ?
@Bigbus @Coppergate7 @Easterdaffsx @EnuffEnuffNow @Hohofortherobbers @Mykittensmittens @Needtokickthehabit @Nowstrong @PrawnBhunaandaFlirtini @RocketRomanos @Touty @Tribute219 @TruthRevolution @afaloren and @Determineddoris , I know you're taking a break, but wanted to tag you.

All good here. Day 4 has crept up on me. My new job helps. Both actually. The 1st is with 30 x 10 year olds so who wants hangover for that and the 2nd starts at 4pm so I obviously can't drink before that. Too tired to drink after that, except on the last 2 Fridays when I've had 1 bottle.
Trying to aim for an af weekend but not putting too much pressure on self.
One day at a time.
It's more hot chocolate weather than chilled wine, anyway. ❄

Thanks for tagging me @Amdone123 Glad the new job is helping.

I’m doing okay. I had four AF nights last week = one more than I was aiming for. Last night was a moderating night and i only had 2 1/2 drinks. I went to bed at 8pm with my book as I knew starting a Netflix movie would just lead to more unnecessary alcohol.

It’s 8pm here and I’m in bed with book again having AF night. Still having the mental gymnastics. The Vodka Vampire is trying to suck out my willpower, whispering that since I didn’t have much last night I could have a drink with dinner, or I could do AF tomorrow instead. It’s insidious! Still feels like I’m a long way away from having a ‘normal’ relationship with alcohol.

Hope everyone else is good x

I’m here @Amdone123 - thanks for asking. How are you??

i’m on and off the wagon, mostly due to work stress - threat of redundancy stuff. Trying to stay positive but by the evening my brain needs an off switch. Having said that, wine isn’t helping me have nice sleep and the last few nights have been manic dreams all of a stressy type.

will try again tonight I think.

@Mykittensmittens awh that sounds stressful. No wonder you're escaping with a glass or 2.
Why don't you try again tonight and report back tomorrow ?
I'm good ta. I'm actually having a great day and before the wine witch knocked at the door. Told her where to go - I know for a fact tomorrow would be awfully painful if I drank tonight.

Hi there, I'm back, I've been hit/miss over the last few weeks, 2 nights AF a week at most. Need a reset, so AF tonight, hopefully till Friday too.....

Hello all, back on my weekday wagon. Only managed 2 days last week. Will do better this week.

I mentioned last week about a friend. Sadly, she died of drink related causes. She was 55. She had only developed a problem about 5 years ago. It can be that quick.💔 Husband and children left behind.

@EnuffEnuffNow well done on 4 nights AF. That is good.

@Amdone123 you are doing really well!

@Mykittensmittens it is hard not to reach for the bottle in times of stress. As amdone123 says, try for AF tonight.

@RocketRomanos so sorry to hear about your friend, that's heartbreaking.
I saw someone I used to work with today. She was telling me her sister - who used to work with us sometimes - is in hospital with ulcerative colitis. She's been told to stop drinking completely ( she was a 2 bottle of wine a night gal ).
I dread that happening to me.

I do feel like I'm doing well, actually. I did go to another surgery and got the paperwork to join. I haven't submitted it yet. I got cold feet ( about taking the antabuse). I'm going to blame my dh because he started talking about a holiday next Easter and my first thought was, How on earth can I go on holiday and not drink ?!!
I can't imagine it.

Hi there @Amdone123 im ok ta, I’ve had another few set backs recently with more people coming on holiday wanting to drink, I did have a plan and organized walks in the day which worked initially. I just have to be more determined to say no.

The longer nights are here now and I find it much easier to abstain in the winter. I want to give it up as moderation does not work for me I am a binge drinker.

@Touty I'm glad the longer, winter nights are better for you. They are for me although I actually hate winter and love summer. Although as I'm getting older, I'm embracing the dark and cold. Every evening I'm to be found sat in bed, warm n cosy, dog snoring and hot chocolate on the go. So, maybe not too bad at all.

I would call myself a binge drinker, too though I have moderated recently.
There are people though who would say my 1 bottle of wine a week is still binge drinking and others who say moderating is a joke.
Who knows ?
I guess we can only do / find what's best for us.

And best for me, too is not drinking at all. No doubt about it.
Woke up today, feeling really refreshed and positive, even looking forward to work. And I've lost 3lbs this week - I never lose weight when I drink more than 1 bottle a week.

My lapse continued I'm afraid. Wine at home every evening for the last 5 days - not masses but...

Today is my first day of half term. So re-set time. I've got to drive tonight and won't get home until 8.30 pm, so it should be easy to resist by then and break this run. Fingers crossed. I don't want this. It was just the easy option...definitely want to go back to changing my lifestyle (and by default life) and step #1 in the is seriously moderating the booze.

Congratulations on the 3 lbs @Amdone123 !

@Coppergate7 thanks.
At least you know what you definitely want. It's just a matter of that first step towards resetting. Which I make sound simple there, but is actually the hardest part.
You can do it.

2nd night off the wine, feel better for it already although the chocolate digestive intake has sky rocketed

LOL @Hohofortherobbers - whatever it takes!

I was AF too last night. I didn't get in until 8.30 pm, which obviously helped. Then I went out again at 10 pm to collect DH from the station (after work meal with two colleagues), who was quite drunk. I really don't like talking to him when he's had that much so I went straight to bed to get away from it. It has made me want to stay sober that's for sure.

Morning !
I'm often to be found in bed with a chocolate bar or two. Rock n roll.

Had a bad day yesterday. I was verbally and very unfairly attacked at work. It was actually the 2nd time this week but I let the first one go, put it down to stress.
Colleague extremely upset and apologetic. I forgave her but then spent all afternoon and evening crying. Floodgates opened.

Was so tempted to drink and actually hesitated outside the shop later last night, but decided it wouldn't help.
The good news is I got 6 numbers on the lottery. The bad news is 3 were on one line, 3 on another 🤣
Day 6, and roll on half term.

Oh @Amdone123 - I'm so sorry you had to endure the brunt of your colleague's unprofessional emotionally immature attack. How horrible. Sounds like they've at least recognised that they need to work on themselves/get some help.

Amazing that you realised booze wouldn't help whilst in the thick of it.

LOL @ the lottery ticket! Pity it wasn't a rolldown - still, hope the two LD tickets are even luckier for you! 🍀

Hello all, thanks for tag @Amdone123 and so sorry you went through that yesterday, can you escalate it? You should never be spoken to like that at work, esp by a colleague.
@Touty we are all here for you, how are you feeling today?
Sorry I haven't been around but I am switching off more and more from social media as it's not healthy plus I'm still going strong not drinking at all (think coming up to 5 months soon) I don't even think about it anymore tbh but have not really been out to restaurants or parties etc that part of my life , even if I'm losing "friends" so be it. Mostly toxic anyway, negative vibes are not for me..they say they miss me and I never come out but they just want he numbers I think and the jokes from me but I am concentrating on my own extended family and myself.
Take care everyone x

Congratulations on nearly five months @Determineddoris !

I've done the same with social media & a toxic friend situation fairly recently. Can't say it was without angst but it is much better now. MN is still an issue though - I keep coming back for this thread but don't seem to have the self discipline not to read/get sucked into posting (different username) on AIBU/relationships etc. Wastes so much time amongst other things. It is just an easy escape, like alcohol I guess.