On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Shiny new thread!

Thank you to @Amdone123 for the last few, she's been around longer than me and always so supportive and kind, thank you!

Tagging people I can from the last thread but please tag any others please!

@texy @Manyrivers @Bigbus @JulieHoney @Mj20 @Starlia

Morning all haven't been around as had very busy week but pleased to report I'm 8 days AF today 😁 hopefully I'm onto another long streak now. Happy Sunday all, wishing you a successful day however that looks for you at the moment

@MsHybridFanGirl , that's brilliant. Well done.

@Determineddoris Yes, so I lost 2 stone doing low carb, I ate under 30 grams of carbs a day and I also introduced olive oil, real butter, mayo, yogurt avocado and high protein. I didn’t strictly follow keto as I think keto is 70 percent fat, which I think is hard to keep up with.

the downside is I had to forget pasta, potatoes and lots of bread, crisps etc. but I’m used to it now.

post menopause I just found I couldn’t lose weight eating carbs.

Ended up doing yet another day trip today on top of a [dry due to driving] housewarming yesterday afternoon/evening - exhausted! House is also looking a bit grim.

I'm having a glass of wine now. Not sure if I'm enjoying it. Same yesterday when I got home - I was one and done. I feel a bit directionless at the moment - so many things I want to change. I've got Thu, Fri and Mon off work (very unusual) coming up meeting a friend a 1.5 hr train ride away on Monday and was thinking about doing a last minute trip somewhere with DH for a night or two but I'm not sure that is wise now - I'm overdoing the busy! Too much too soon...it's what I'm working towards though. I think.

Great to read all this moderating and abstaining going on!

Another strange day. I'm feeling a bit like you @Coppergate4 , directionless ! I'm normally full of energy but today, a bit flat.
I had to force myself to go to zumba, which was boring I'm afraid ( different instructor). School fayre was lovely but tiring.
I've had 2 small glasses of white wine which I did enjoy but thankfully, no urge to carry on.
Unfortunately ( !!!), my granddaughter loves the tombola stall and wins Nana bottles of anything ranging from washing up liquid to red wine. So, now I have 2 bottles of white, 1 bottle of red and a bottle of pink gin, amongst other things.
But, no urge to drink them like I normally would. I'll probably have to get rid of it all, though.

9 days without a drink.

I nearly had one tonight; feeling down. I’ve realized that people don’t change, they might listen but then they carry on with their old ways anyway. So I know that I have to change. I thought a drink would just block out the sadness.

Stay with it Touty, you have this. Remember how tough that first day was and you got through it xxx

Im failing failing failing and doing it miserably. Night away with DP with wine, then by total surprise two different friends 'needed' me for things at the weekend while kids were with their dad so night one was a bottle and a half and night two... well around the same. Yesterday was beer cos I needed hair of the dog and kids are not back till tomorrow so I pretty much drank beer all day and went to sleep on the couch. Im awake now cos I slept so early last night. Im so annoyed with myself. My life is PERFECT and I have no reason for drinking bar habit. It is not lonliness, it is not over compensating for anything, it is not boredom as I have a full life it really just is habit and I want out of this habit.

@MsHybridFanGirl well done for your streak great news and @Touty I'm feeling all the mehs at the moment too so I'm feeling you but as @daffodills1 said remember that day one. I'm struggling ATM too esp reading people have been able to moderate which is well done btw but it makes me feel a bit pants but I'm carrying on regardless! How are you @daffodills1 ? @Coppergate4 and @Amdone123 you have both done a good job moderating!
@Needtokickthehabit wow love the positivity vibes about how you are happy in your life its good to read I just saw this and thought of you don't know if it'll help it's free today.

@Touty , well done on Day 10. That's absolutely brilliant. I sometimes think people look like they're listening but not !
Carry on, double figure today.
@Needtokickthehabit , try not to be annoyed with yourself when this happens. It just makes you feel worse. You tried, you're trying to address it. It is just a habit I agree but it's so difficult to stop.

Well, I drank yesterday. 1 bottle of red wine and 1 bottle of 5% white ( I'm not counting this. It was as strong as Pepsi max). Only had breakfast and smoked about 5 cigarettes.
I'm not beating myself up. I knew I'd drink it because it was there. And I made a fancy salmon tray make that needed a splash of red wine so there's my excuse.

@Determineddoris thank you have just ordered it.

@Amdone123 It is just such a vicious circle and any excuse goes. Today I feel physically like crap to be honest but so much to do. I will reward myself tonight with something but I am refusing to go overboard with it. I need to get myself sorted.

@Amdone123 yes, I know what you mean.

I’ve been thinking about how alcohol makes me passive. There are certain things and relationships that make me sad; usually I will just have a drink or three to make myself feel better. Without the booze I find myself thinking about how to change things, how to change myself so that I am emotionally more independent.

I used to think, well at least I can drown it all out with a few vodkas later, life ain’t so bad etc. Now without booze I feel forced to deal with reality every day.

@Touty , definitely, I'm an overthinker. I definitely drink to escape. And when I was teaching, I was always thinking about different activities I could do with the kids to make them more engaged. I never switched off - I'm sure that's when it all started.

I can really relate to that @Touty .

I sat here 'waiting' for it to be time to have a glass of wine - not because I particularly want a glass of wine but I want an escape...from what I'm not sure. The abyss of the evening and the reality I probably won't do anything productive with it? Rumination over minor irritations and relationships? The habit of feeling the need to celebrate the end of a difficult/average/good/great/shit working day?

I can relate so much also. I spent all day looking forward to leaving work so I could drink.. my anxiety has been horrendous

I'm going to be a nana !
I mentioned on here a while back that I'd heard some news through the grapevine but was waiting for it to be confirmed.
Another reason to stay sober and be as healthy as possible. ❤️

@Coppergate4 yes, I know what you mean. I was just thinking about what it is I miss about my nightly large vodka and tonics, it’s not the actual booze it’s to escape, well the thoughts in my head I suppose, round and round they go negative thoughts, I start to wonder, whether I’ve lost touch with reality.

@Amdone123 congratulations 🎉

So good morning to all. I had a seriously productive day yesterday and 'only' had half a bottle of wine which is good for me. I have been reading up on withdrawals from alcohol and wonder if I would be ok to go cold turkey but I am not actually ready for that yet and I know this so if I can cut down first that might work although it could be a fairytale I am telling myself too...

Hi all, hope you are all doing ok whatever the day has bought you! Congratulations @Amdone123 ! I love babies so much honestly and dogs but can't have any more babies and no dogs and allergic to cats...
@Needtokickthehabit interesting about the cold turkey do you think you would get withdrawal pain etc? How much were you drinking before ? I was drinking a bottle of wine plus a day but been cold turkey quite a few times so maybe my body got used to it. I'm 4 weeks today!
My bloods came back and funnily enough the diabetic level didn't come down so still pre diabetic and it showed I have high cholesterol and lack of VIt D! Wth so yeah no more basically food I enjoy. I also was reading and it says smoking causes high chol.too! But at the moment that's my vice but I didn't smoke today we were at Wimbledon! Whoo was so good sat in the rain for a bit but was good court 1 and then some of the outside courts. I was surprised we got there as H had a accident last night and was in A+e most the night but turns out no broken bones just cuts and blood everywhere! He was cycling on his daily commute and a car came out of nowhere and he went into the car....and it was raining quite hard too poor thing but now he's milking it telling me to do all the housework and bins!

Congratulations @Amdone123 that’s lovely news. As you say, a great incentive to get healthy. I’m 46 and my kids are 11, 14 and 16. I keep thinking how old they’ll be when im 56 or 66 and how I really want to be around as long as I can. I’ve lost 1 stone 5.5 lbs so far! This is what is keeping me moderating I think.

@Determineddoris I’m off to Wimbledon tomorrow. I can’t wait! I will have a drink though but I don’t want to get drunk so think I will be able to moderate.

@Needtokickthehabit if you go cold turkey is there anyone at home with you? How much and for how long have you been drinking? Some areas will offer a home detox if needed.

@Amdone123 I hope you are enjoying the tennis!

Good wishes to all the moderates and abstinents!

Not a clue the last time I had a booze free night but it is definitely over 3 years and at that it might have been one or two nights and then I would reward myself. I dont crave alcohol during the day (unless a heavy night the night before) and I can get up at 7am and go to work and not have a thought of wine all day for the most part but it is still a reward and it got worse during covid cos working from home meant not needing to moderate for driving the next morning etc.

Just checking in - no booze today. I don’t seem to have lost any weight despite it being 11 days sober. If anything, I think I’ve put on a few pounds. I think I’ll have to cut out the zero alcohol lager, too many carbs.

Hi all, just checking in too. Had a difficult week but things starting to feel a bit better. I began therapy today and have been reading up about 'survival mode' and realise how detached I became from everyone. Starting to feel a bit better. So grateful for the thread, thank you