On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Shiny new thread!

Thank you to @Amdone123 for the last few, she's been around longer than me and always so supportive and kind, thank you!

Tagging people I can from the last thread but please tag any others please!

@texy @Manyrivers @Bigbus @JulieHoney @Mj20 @Starlia

@texy my plan this week is to abstain. My intake has severely reduced over the last few weeks and I am enjoying the benefits. I'm hoping the less I have the less I'll want. Work stress is my biggest trigger and there is plenty of that around this week! That will be my biggest challenge, not to stop off on the way home for wine.

I fell asleep and the 'worldly traveller' is in a taxi coming home, so I'll catch up later !

Quick one - yes, best abstaining and @Determineddoris , you're so right. Even if we go in a pub, I can have an af drink - doh !
I've already decided that af kopperberg will be my go to drink.

@Needtokickthehabit , what about seeing your gp before you quit ? I'm worried. I know you said tapering - not really heard that before.

Well, the traveller is home. Before he put his case down, before anything, he noticed the clean house ! I knew he would. Result.

He's also brought a case of rum and liquers ( he doesn't even drink - not much anyway).
Thankfully, I hate the stuff.

Evening, all. Hope you're all ok.
Not a good day.
My dsis who lives about 3 hours away was taken to hospital this pm with a suspected stroke. I'm leaving early tomorrow morning to go and see her.
Once she's discharged ( whenever that may be), I'll go and stay with her for a bit as her dh is in the Navy - she's very rural, isolated really.
Take care, folks - I'll try to post soon as I can.
❤

Oh, I haven't drank - ❤

@Amdone123, I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. Hope she's ok! Wow well done for your resolve, that's amazing! Keep going x

Hey @Amdone123 oh gosh I'm sorry to hear about your sister! Hope she's going to be ok and recovers well, she's so lucky to have you! And bloody well done for not pouring even after this shock. You got this x

@daffodills1 how are you today?

@Needtokickthehabit did you manage a tapering schedule?

@texy sorry to hear you didn't sleep well last night hopefully you will sleep better tonight! Hayfever is a bitch!

@Amdone123 sending well wishes and a speedy recovery to your sister.

And here it comes, the post work stress and desire to dial it down with alcohol.

I've had all the usual head conversations,. Telling myself some beers or fruit ciders wouldn't be too bad on a work night, won't get a hangover from that etc, I can easily nip down to the shop, it would only take me 10mins.

Im posting on here for accountability. I do not want to drink tonight. I'm going to shower, change, drink some water, eat my dinner and watch TV. I have a mountain of chores to do but I can't face them today. Tonight I'm prioritising nd concentratinv on staying sober, and if its all I can achieve then I'm fine with that.

How's everyone else getting on this evening?

Thanks, folks.
It hasn't really occurred to me to drink today. Maybe if I'd had it in, but no, I need a good night's sleep ( as best as I'll manage) as I have to set off 5.30am.
@Manyrivers , yes, do all those things and concentrate like you say, on staying sober. You'll feel so much better tomorrow.

A good night's sleep will be brilliant thinking of you @Amdone123 !

@Manyrivers you are amazing !!!! Fighting those thoughts away ! I have to admit on the way home from getting kids I was thinking I could do with a drink but I quickly batted it away and drank my squash as soon as I got home..it's so hard especially with the stress of work etc you are doing brilliant and yes leave the chores for another day you got this girl!

@Amdone123 so sorry to hear about your sister. I hope they can work out what's going on and help her to feel better as soon as possible. I'm sure she'll be really glad to see you tomorrow.

@Manyrivers - I hear you and feel your pain. I've had non-stop zoom meetings for the whole day and shit just piling on more shit work-wise. I did some work on Saturday and Sunday this weekend to try and get ahead but by about 10.30am today I was behind again! I had PT this eve which was a great distraction but also had to be weighed and measured today plus the whole session was in front of a mirror so not feeling great about myself this evening! A bath and a yummy dinner sounds like a plan. It's the wine witch that's trying to get to you and will try any technique she can. I like to picture her peering through windows on her tiptoes dressed like Grotbags (remember her?!)

@Determineddoris you're doing so well with your squash and taking control. It's a bit relentless but every time you do it you're building up your strength. A bit like me tonight with those F'ing dumbells 😂😂

Hi thanks. I don't feel as worried this evening. I think I had hangxiety earlier today from the beers last night. I was googling the other day about how to quit drinking and came across tapering so decided to do it this way. I hope it works.

I have a plan. I just now need to stick to it. My plan tonight is half bottle of wine. I have literally just showered and gotten into bed clothes and into bed and the wine is beside me. There is no more in the house. Tomorrow my plan is quarter bottle. I have not gotten further than that as I need to be sure I stick to the two days first.

@Needtokickthehabit that sounds like a good move. You build trust in yourself too when you can show yourself how strong you are. Ow will you manage the quarter bottle? By buying a small bottle? Might be hard to try and leave a larger bottle open and just stop.

I've been very restless tonight but also exhausted which makes for agitated slug vibes. Early night and hopefully tomorrow is a better day!

Hope everyone's evenings have been positive

Oh tonight I only bought a half bottle. There is no way a full bottle would get left with half in it. Tomorrow I will just buy a quarter bottle. Once I am showered and moisturised etc i would never leave the house again so it is more stretching the evening out before having the wine that is the harder part for me.

@Determineddoris, I made it back into work after a week off sick, so anxious as I get so worried about time off and making things harder for colleagues
The whole day was a battle of anxiety but I got through it and it's a positive step.
Trying to avoid the wine in the fridge (didn't know it was there as I'm 100% sure I would have drunk that over the weekend- I'm drinking a Vodka before bed instead and trying to taper also

Good Luck @Needtokickthehabit and @daffodills1 - tapering is a good idea if you’ve been drinking a lot everyday for a long time. If you need to, then you can pause at certain stages. For example, if you manage quarter of a bottle but feel like you’ll relapse if you try to abstain completely then stick to 1/4 for a few more days. 1/4 of a bottle is better than what you were drinking. And if you crack and have a bad day remember it’s part of the process of recovery - it’s not always a straight road and try to see any slip-ups as part of the learning process and not a reason to give up trying. If you do have a bad day, don’t feel like you can’t come back on here. We’ve all had our ups and downs.

best of luck to you both.

Good Morning,

@texy The grotbags image made me laugh! I do remember her.

How is everyone else doing today? @daffodills1 @Needtokickthehabit hope your evenings went to plan and if not there's always a chance to reset today.

No prizes for guessing I'm feeling glad I didn't drink last night, really aware I'm always only a split second away from making my usual choice. I don't keep any alcohol in the house and this is a definite factor for me. After my decision was made not to drink (and I was really struggling in those moments), I had a nice evening and did do those pesky chores after all. My intention is not to drink tonight. I have another stressful work day ahead which by 6pm will no doubt test me.

Have a good day everyone

@Needtokickthehabit and @daffodills1 you're doing really well. It's so hard to make a start and you're there, doing it! Well done. How are you both feeling today?

@Amdone123 hope your visit goes well and your sister is feeling better.

@Manyrivers how are you feeling this morning? Hopefully the bath, food, tv combo helped ⭐️

Oh @Manyrivers we cross-posted. Happy you're feeling glad you didn't drink, I am too. I agree with the not keeping it in the house, that is a great strategy. I can't do that as my partner drinks (fairly heavily actually, I'm realising) and now my step daughter is home from uni so it's like open-season on weekday drinking which is harder some nights than others. Last night was hard!

So many lovely supportive messages thank you all so much!

Night one of having half a bottle instead of a full one or sometimes it crept to two bottles, went well. I feel good this morning. I was in bed asleep by 11.30 and did not wake till 8.30. I did wake for an hour around 3.30am but was able to go back to sleep and no restless legs which I have been putting down to peri but wondering about that now too.

Today I am working from home and it is sunny outside. This is my achilles heel because I can log in and out when I please and sometimes I have gone and bought beers cos they are much lighter in my head than wine and just drank from early evening till bedtime so it is forcing myself out of the habits that I need to do too.

Best of luck to all today in your non drinking or lowering endeavours.

I have just taken my first two milk thistle tablets.